A Month To Remember

By Sniffles

Happy Leap Day. We cats have spent some time this afternoon thinking about Black History Month 2024. We don't know about you, but for us it was one of the most educational Black History Months ever.

Some of this was intentional. For example, historian and commentator Michael Harriot crafted a superb Twitter thread to teach followers about how the Dark Ages were only "dark" if you were talking about white people in Europe — that in Africa and the Middle East, brown and Black people were creating algebra, the decimal, and the concept of zero. (And by the way, it was the white Southerners in the antebellum US who were uneducated, not the Black people they kidnapped and enslaved.)

Some of it just happened in the news. The Trumpster defendant's attempt to besmirch Fani Willis and get her removed from her racketeering 2020 election case in Georgia brought Willis herself to the stand, where she schooled a whole bunch of us on things like why African-Americans keep stashes of money in their homes. Her dad, civil rights activist John Clifford Floyd III, explained further: "It's a Black thing," he said. "Most Black folks hide cash or they keep cash. You always keep some cash because I've been places and just because of the color of my skin..." Say no more, Mr. Floyd, point taken.

And then of course there was Beyoncé. The fury in MAGA world that an accomplished Black performer would dare produce a country album seemed like a headline from another world. Country, like any other major American music genre, has its roots in the Black experience. And then tons of people took her cover of "Texas Hold 'Em" and put their own special spin on it. Ain't America great? We cats PURR.

No One Is Riding To The Rescue (And Maybe That's A Good Thing)

By Hubie and Bertie

Once again, it looks like the Supreme Court will be driving furious people to the polls. That is, if the outrage that we're seeing today on social media translates (as it surely will) into votes. 

As for us, we're never thrilled with SCOTUS these days, but we're not wringing our paws, either. When it comes to Benedict Donald's criminal trials, we agree with Lawrence O'Donnell — the one MSNBC talking head we can actually stand, so if we happen to surf by and see him, we'll stop and listen. Lawrence says he doesn't care when the trials take place, because Trump and his party are going to lose in November anyway. 

Yup. The GOP is splintered and broke, financially held hostage by an equally cash-strapped nominee-to-be. The House Republican caucus is an embarrassing mess. And Donald is disintegrating mentally by the day. All of this is happening in the midst of GOP primaries that have been rigged as winner-take-all, so there's no way delegates can dump Trump in July without a bloodbath. Meanwhile, the Democratic turnout machine is purring along, the economy is healthy, and so is Joe Biden.

Do we have work to do between now and November 5? Absolutely. But if we do it, we should be able to have the election we want. We are the cavalry — so let's saddle up! We cats PURR.

(IMAGE: Deviant Art. You have no idea how many images of cats riding horses are on the interwebs!)

What Donald Doesn't Have

By Miss Kubelik

Hmmm, from his lawyers' request today, it looks like Benedict Donald doesn't have the money to appeal the $464 million judgment against him in his New York civil fraud trial. He wants to post a $100 million bond while he appeals the decision instead.

Poor baby. Despite his lies about easily having $400 million in cash lying around, he's begging for mercy and contemplating a fire sale on his properties. And the whole time, the clock is ticking.

You know what else he hasn't got? Unbridled support from Republicans in the primaries. The Michigan contest yesterday was the fourth state in which he's underperformed public polling leading up to Primary/Caucus Day. The last two public polls in Michigan had Trump beating Nikki Haley by more than 60 points, but he won last night by 42. It's very much like what we saw in Iowa, New Hampshire and South Carolina.

If this seems like a lot of Inside Baseball, it is, but take it from us — Trump has a big problem. Despite the brouhaha that the media made about the "Uncommitted" vote in the Democratic Michigan primary, Benedict Donald has a far more serious challenge ahead of him in the GOP. With all of his criminality, the waning appeal of his MAGA shtick, and the fury of women post-Dobbs, a sizable slice of the party is opposing him — either by voting for Haley, or, particularly in the case of Iowa, staying home. And many Republicans have told reporters that they're open to voting for Biden in the fall.

Icing on the cake: The RNC is as broke as he is. We cats PURR.

81 Percent Is 81 Percent

By Zamboni

Numbers guys whose smarts and analysis we respect agree: The alleged Gaza protest vote had modest support in yesterday's Michigan Democratic primary.

"'Uncommitted' didn't really get that big a share of the vote," says Larry Sabato of the University of Virginia Center for Politics. "Yes, it got 13 percent, although that's not terribly larger than the Uncommitted vote against Barack Obama in 2012...You could spin the results as being bad for Biden...You could also spin the results as being good for Biden, because turnout was robust and he still got a very large chunk of the vote."

("Very large chunk," in this instance, is 81 percent. Not too shabby, especially when you take Trump's underperformance in the same state on the same day. More on that later.)

We cats got all our primary night news from the interwebs, because cable TV is insufferable, and last night was no exception. It's very frustrating that so-called journalists appear to think that hewing to their scripted narratives is more important than how people actually vote. Just when we're ready to hack up multiple hairballs, though, Sabato has beamed in with a very mild-mannered observation.

"This might, collectively, be the least-competitive Presidential nominating season in modern history," he says. "There's usually a lot to talk about during primary season, but this time there isn't. We are building toward another blockbuster Presidential general election. But the primary season isn't providing much drama. So there is a desire to hunt for drama."

Thanks, Professor Sabato — what a low-key, super-nice way of saying that the media are only interested in likes, page views and clicks. We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

How To Co-op A Meme

By Baxter

MAGA Republicans and the Fox "News" crowd are never happy with anything Joe Biden does, but they're particularly bent out of shape that he's embracing the Dark Brandon persona — the way he did on The Late Show with Seth Meyers last night. They even resent it when he goes out for ice cream! Cry harder, folks. We cats PURR.

Just Six Out Of Ten

By Sniffles

Before we turn our attention to Michigan on Tuesday, let's look back on how Benedict Donald has done in the last three Republican contests. Hmmm, we cats sense a soft underbelly to GOP voters' fealty.

Trump underperformed pre-election public polling by seven or eight points in all three states. He was polling at plus-37 in Iowa, but was plus-30 in the final results. In New Hampshire, polls expected him to win by plus-18, but in the end he won by plus-11. And in South Carolina yesterday, he came in at plus-20 instead of the expected plus-28.

Still big margins, but a warning bell for Team Trump, assuming they know anything about politics. Yes, polling is a mess these days, but it looks like the "weak" Trump voters are turning against him when push comes to shove. In fact, an exit poll in South Carolina showed that 40 percent of the Republican electorate said they would not vote for Trump in the general election. Wow!

Have you seen any coverage of this? Bet not. But the entire punditocracy would be exploding if Joe Biden was losing 40 percent of Democratic voters. (He won 97 percent of the vote our Palmetto State primary yesterday.) When will the talking heads and other idiots abandon their stupid narratives and focus on how weak Trump will be in November? We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

P.S. Looking for a good time? Check out the Trump Debt Calculator, your handy reminder that, thanks to prejudgment interest, Benedict Donald's legal obligations from the E. Jean Carroll and NYAG civil fraud decisions continue to mount by the moment. We cats PURR.

Farewell To Flaco

By Hubie and Bertie

Yes, we cats are bird predators, but we still feel pretty bad about the death of Flaco, the owl who escaped the Central Park Zoo and contentedly roamed New York City for a year.

Is it because, as a free bird, he looked at us through our windows instead of us looking at him in a cage? Whatever. He definitely captured everybody's imagination — no matter our backgrounds, experiences or beliefs. That's the power of nature. We cats PURR.

The GOP War On Love And Joy

By Miss Kubelik

We cats are running out of ways to say "Another bad day for the Republicans." But goodness gracious, what a pickle they're in after that wacky decision in Alabama on in vitro fertilization.

Frankly, we can't imagine that GOP assaults on reproductive choices like IVF and access to Mifepristone, the so-called abortion drug, are going to end up being successful— because too many people are making too much money off of both. And you know that everything comes down to the almighty dollar, right? So while the Alabama Supreme Court's ruling on IVF was awful on its face, it was easy to predict what would happen next: that the Republican Party would run as fast and as far from it as they could — like kids who have kicked over a hornet's nest.

The National Republican Senatorial Committee has raced out a statement to its candidates, urging them to oppose the Alabama decision. Nikki Haley, having first said that she thinks fertilized embryos are children, is now furiously backpedaling. They've all suddenly seen the numbers — polls that indicate the zillions of voters who have had kids via IVF, and that say upward of 80 percent support it as a family-planning option. What a bunch of sorry-ass amateurs they are. (Or maybe just woman haters, who knows?)

And then of course you have right-wing maniac Christopher Rufo coming out with a full-throated statement against recreational sex. Do we think that's why President Biden has said in a recent interview that the key to a good marriage is having fun in bed? There are no coincidences where Dark Brandon is concerned. We cats love the bind that Republicans have put themselves in, and we PURR.

CPAC Goes Poof (Not A Pun)

 

By Zamboni

Wow! Looks like the organizers of CPAC 2024 should have picked a smaller venue than the Gaylord National Resort & Convention Center. They're not exactly packing them in, so perhaps they should downsize next year — if, indeed, they even decide to hold another one.

The event runs through Saturday, so we guess there's a chance that this room gets filled at some point. But the vibe is definitely one of indifference and lethargy — or maybe fear of being groped by Matt Schlapp, LOL. The low turnout is particularly interesting coming on the heels of Benedict Donald's money troubles. His campaign raised $3 million less than Nikki Haley did last month, and it has 200,000 fewer donors than it did four years ago. Add the fact that it spent more in January than it took in — on legal fees, we assume — and you're looking at a weak, maybe even flatlining 2024 for the Trumpsters.

(Nevertheless, the media seem intent on portraying Joe Biden as the "beleaguered" candidate, but that's a subject for another post. Warning to journalists: We will not be kind.)

Why is Donald doing so poorly? Do his previous donors have a problem with paying for his lawyers? Are they bored with the same old shtick he rolls out at his "shows"? Are they tired of all the losing when he promised them nothing but winning? Or — and this is the first thing that crossed our minds — are a lot of them dead from COVID? Perhaps it's all of the above. At any rate, we cats love it, and we PURR.

Another Reason To Take The House Back

By Baxter

Just think of what a Democratic House could do to punish James Comer and Gym Jordan for either 1) being duped by Russian agents, or 2) knowingly colluding with them to impeach a US President.

Yep, it appears that one of those two things has got to be true, because Alexander Smirnov, the "star witness" in the GOP's laughable Biden impeachment probe, has been charged with lying to the FBI — peddling a story that has since been revealed to have originated in the Kremlin. (Remind your MAGA friends that the prosecutor who charged Smirnov was appointed by Benedict Donald.)

Running with the fake Burisma allegations, either knowingly or un-, will be bad news for Comer and Jordan if they find themselves with Speaker Hakeem Jeffries come January 2025. Democrats could vote to remove them their committees and censure them. And they could be fat targets for investigation, too. It would be worth everyone's time to figure out if these two lowlifes conspired to defraud the United States.

When did Jim and Gym learn that the FBI suspected Smirnov of lying? Once they did know, why didn't they instantly retract his story and distance themselves? What contact, if any, did they have with anyone linked to the Russian agents who were pushing the lie? Depending on the answers, criminal charges could loom.

But we won't find out unless we win the House in 2024. Let's get to work, everyone! We cats PURR.

Silence Of The Bushies

By Sniffles

Considering how bad the Republicans have gotten, we're almost tempted to remember the days of the Bushes with nostalgia. Almost. George H.W. Bush gave us Clarence Thomas, among other outrages. Smirky, of course, gave us Iraq, Samuel Alito, the botched response to Hurricane Katrina, and the 2008 economic meltdown. Good times.

But bending knee to Benedict Donald has brought the GOP lower than low. It's astounding how they've pivoted on Vladimir Putin and Russia. While it's the MAGAts in Congress who are holding up funding for Ukraine, the rest of the party has been nearly silent as Russia continues to score victories on the battlefield. Except for a small group of opinion leaders such as Max Boot and David Frum, Republicans are happy to either keep their heads down or — like Tim Scott or JD Vance, who are auditioning as Trump running mates — to bleat their fealty to Vlad.

Open support for Russia is sickening. But it's the gutless silence that really galls. You really have to wonder why Smirky and Jeb! haven't stepped up to defend their late Poppy, whose worldview the spineless Republicans insult every day. And where the hell is Condoleezza Rice, former Secretary of State and alleged Soviet expert? We can't find any recent statement from her, either in her no-doubt-highly-paid speeches or in her Twitter feed. There's one anodyne comment about Navalny, with no mention of Putin — otherwise, a lot of golf and football.

Will anybody ask them for comment? Or does institutional memory not exist in journalism anymore? We cats hack up a hairball, and we HISS.

Happy Presidents Day

By Hubie and Bertie

Note to anyone foolish enough to buy the latest gewgaws that Benedict Donald is hawking: You won't see your purchase for months, if at all.

"Trump Fragrances are expected to start shipping in June 2024. Trump Sneakers are expected to start shipping in July 2024 for the gold High-Tops, and the Potus 45 White Knit and Red Wave Knit are expected to ship in August 2024. Shipping and delivery dates are estimates only...We cannot guarantee when your order will arrive."

If you're not one of those folks, you can spend Presidents Day savoring this latest poll of Presidential scholars on the best and worst POTUSes. See if you can guess where Benedict Donald lands. We cats PURR.

What We're Seeing (Shout-Out To Tish James)

"At his core, under all the pomp and bluster, Trump is insecure and fearful. He craves respect and legitimacy. Unable to obtain it on merit, he falsified narratives. He began this many decades ago, before politics. He lied about his inheritance, grades, skill, wealth and acuity.

"He inflated his wealth and deflated his inheritance to put forth an exaggerated perception of his business prowess. This was his original Big Lie. He created a contrived image that became a House of Cards, and as it crumbled, it was rescued by Mark Burnett (creator of The Apprentice) and by Russia.

 

"The events of this past week cut him deeply, as it attacked his essence — his wealth — his mystique. He was a narcissist and sociopath since he was young, but he's more 'owned' by his dysfunctions now than ever before. The NYAG case undermined it, a narcissist's nightmare.

 

"Yesterday, he got booed at the Sneaker Con event. We would see and hear him booed more often if every single event, rally and appearance wasn't rigged and staffed and secured against it. We won't see many impromptu appearances going forward, and my guess is he'll never debate.

 

"I'm frequently asked about narcissistic collapse. There's still time before that — sorry. But he cannot stop campaigning, and when he does, he cannot stop confessing and projecting. I'll be watching how often he speaks to two things: his wealth/success, and his cognition.

 

"PS:I expect we'll see him sweat and sniff and sundown more. And repeat nonsensical narratives, like magnets and whales. But I'll look for signs of real fear, as he puts forth bluster and defiance: His wealth. His cognition. And how he processes immunity being denied by SCOTUS."

 

—The Shallow State

Da Svidania, Aleksei

 

Reporters need to ask "Speaker" Mike Johnson and his Putin-loving Congressional Republicans when — not if, but when — they will support immediate aid to Ukraine. If this means following them home to their districts during their Presidents' Day two-week vacation, so be it. But will they? We cats aren't holding our breath, and we HISS.

Posting This Today For No Particular Reason

 

Two things we liked most about Fani Willis's appearance in Fulton County court this afternoon:

1. Her Power Pink outfit. Feminine, but also Don't f with me.

2. "A man is not a plan." Fabulous — especially when she started by saying to the feckless Trumpy attorney, "Let's go on and have a conversation." We thought, Uh-oh. Add that to your repertoire for the next time someone really annoys you. We cats PURR.

Elsie's Bad Night, Squared

By Miss Kubelik

Is anything stupider than Benedict Donald's "thumb's up" gesture? Yes, actually — Elise Stefanik.

"Elsie" heartily endorsed criminal grifter George Santos for NY-03 in 2022, and then after he crashed, burned and was expelled from Congress, heartily endorsed token woman of color Mazi Pilip (above), who got her clock cleaned by Democrat Tom Suozzi last night. This Elsie humiliation is so fun that we cats are willing to put up with the press's "badly needed shot of optimism for Democrats" framing in exchange.

The truth, which political pundits and other idiots refuse to recognize, is that Democrats have been wildly successful ever since June 24, 2022, a date that will live in infamy — when the Supreme Court stripped millions and millions of women of their right to bodily autonomy. Turns out that people don't like the idea of Republicans making pregnant women bleed out in hospital parking lots.

But that's not all, folks:

"Snowmageddon" didn't materialize. Yesterday's Nor'easter was gone by noonish, and the roads got cleared. A Republican group even paid for plows! And Central Park looked lovely.

Asian-American voters are close to 20 percent in NY-03, concentrated in Queens. Representative Grace Meng busted her ass in the AAPI community for Suozzi. Go, Gracie!

The polls were wrong again. They had Suozzi narrowly ahead, and he won by eight — a 16-point swing from 2022. The media, of course, will never stop hyping them, no matter how flawed they are.

Mike Johnson just can't seem to lead Congressional Republicans to victory. How embarrassing that they get whooped in NY-03 mere hours after they impeached a Cabinet Secretary by one vote. Will Benedict Donald call for Mikey to be overthrown over this?

As Mitch McConnell has been known to grumble, poor candidate quality in winnable seats hurts Republicans. Mazi Pilip was inaccessible, incoherent, bad in the debate, and a no-show to a lot of events, relying on surrogates (who apparently didn't do a very good job).

Finally, yes, this result is about Suozzi leaning into GOP hypocrisy on immigration. But maybe it's also about the fact that the economy, thanks to Joe Biden, is doing really well. We cats PURR.

"Don't Bother / They're Already Here"

"I’m emotionally exhausted. A week from today, people of my district will begin voting for me or my opponent to represent their voice in DC, BUT the institution has gained yet another bruise delivered by the Clown House Republican majority.

"I wake up, every day, and take my oath seriously — only show up to work and be met with people hell-bent on sideshows instead of solutions. These people are dangerous.

"The few Republicans that joined us still hold some reverence for our work. The others are just doing whatever they can to please a man who truly earned his impeachments and should have been convicted. But maybe convictions will come from the nonpolitical juries that he is trying his hardest to avoid."

—Congresswoman Jasmine Crockett (D-TX)

Flake Rate, Part Deux

By Zamboni

Big winter storm in NY-03 tomorrow. It's a good thing that the Tom Suozzi for Congress campaign banked all those early votes, because travel to the polls in the George Santos special election will probably be difficult. As one of our favorite Democratic strategists points out, "In 2022, about 70 percent of the votes were cast on Election Day. I would estimate it will be a smaller share, both because high-propensity voters skew to early voting, and the snowstorm.  

"Speaking of snow, since the GOP enters Election Day with a deficit in the early vote, it stands to reason that anything that limits Election Day turnout is bad for them...Suozzi and Republican Mazi Pilip are both relying on a lot of their supporters to come out tomorrow. Pilip just needs more." We cats still have our paws crossed, and we PURR.

A Note From Beau's Mom

By Baxter

We cats have no desire to give Robert Hur and his silly documents report any further oxygen, but we have to share what landed in our email in-box last night from First Lady Jill Biden. Not sure there's any point in discussing this anymore — she's said it all. We cats salute her, and we PURR.

"Rather than just saying the case was closed, as they have for others, the Special Counsel claimed that Joe 'couldn't remember the year his son died.' Believe me, like anyone who has lost a child, Beau and his death never leave him.

"I hope you can imagine how it felt to read that attack — not just as Joe's wife, but as Beau's mother.

"I don't know what this Special Counsel was trying to achieve. We should give everyone grace, and I can't imagine someone would try to use our son's death to score political points. If you've experienced a loss like that, you know that you don't measure it in years — you measure it in grief.

"May 30th is a day forever etched on our hearts. It shattered me, it shattered our family...What helped me, and what helped Joe, was to find purpose. That's what keeps Joe going, serving you and the country we love.

"Joe is 81, that's true — but he's 81 doing more in an hour than most people do in a day. He has delivered on so many of his promises as President precisely because he's learned a lot in those 81 years. His age, with his experience, is an incredible asset, and he proves it daily.

"At some point in our lives, we'll all experience grief and loss. We'll go through challenging moments and twists and turns. But we find joy together, we persevere together, and ultimately we'll prevail together. Thank you for being a part of our campaign. Love, Jill."

A Quick Note On NY-03

By Sniffles

The early vote/absentee vote in the race to replace disgraced expelled very strange criminal Republican George Santos in Congress is looking promising for the Democratic candidate, former Representative Tom Suozzi: Early in-person votes are clocking in at nearly 38,000, with early votes by Democrats leading by 11.2 percent. Absentee votes by mail are at nearly 12,000 (with those by Democrats at plus-29 percent). These figures all outpace 2022.

This is good news, since getting votes "in the bank" frees the Suozzi campaign to concentrate on those who haven't voted yet and/or who are low-propensity. A strong early vote also can help motivate folks who aren't sure about turning out — it lets them know that their neighbors are voting, and maybe they should, too.

That's why Suozzi is criss-crossing the district today, holding GOTV rallies, meeting with canvassers, and marching in Lunar New Year parades — because today is the next-to-last day for early voting before Tuesday's election. There's a bit more urgency, too, with snow forecast for Election Day. And Long Island and northeast Queens have become dicey territory for Democrats these last few years.

Still, final polls have Suozzi ahead by about three points, so we're cautiously optimistic if he and his supporters can put in the work. They've gotten an extra push from their Republican opponent, Mazi Pilip, who's been doing all sorts of silly things lately — refusing to explain her positions on abortion and gun violence, and claiming she doesn't remember who she voted for in 2020. (Hint: It was Trump.) Our paws are crossed, and we cats PURR.

Who Has A Scream Now?

By Hubie and Bertie

Twenty years ago, Governor Howard Dean entered political history — and not in a way he wanted — with his "I Have a Scream" speech after coming in third in Iowa's Democratic caucuses.

After the event, his campaign staff was surprised at the coverage, which implied that Dean had gone completely off the rails. Those who had been in the auditorium knew that the roar of the crowd had been so deafening that Dean had had to shout to be heard. But as it turned out, only the Governor was mic'd — muting the crowd noise, and making the whole thing seem very different (and crazy) on TV.

Somebody on Joe Biden's staff must have been there, and remembered. Because in last night's presser on Robert Hur's documents report, everyone was mic'd — not just the President. Viewers got a clear sense of what it was like to be in that room, and it wasn't pretty. The White House press corps came off as the most uncontrolled mob in a government building since January 6, 2021. You couldn't blame viewers for thinking they'd start smearing feces on the walls.

We cats have never been worried about Dark Brandon and 2024. (Team Biden is clearly on top of their game.) What does worry us is the media's hostility — and simultaneous slavish devotion to Benedict Donald, because he gets them eyeballs, likes and clicks, democracy be damned. Which makes the White House's mic move last night even more brilliant.

As for this Hur person, like all MAGA Republicans, he tries to wound — but then carelessly overshoots the mark. Voters don't like cruelty toward a bereaved parent. Ultimately, it won't matter, because Hur's report will soon be subsumed by Benedict Donald's criming. But what the Trumpsters have yet to realize is that the majority of Americans are simply not as vicious as they are. We cats HISS.

A New Low

Take it from us, there is no way Joe Biden doesn't remember when his son Beau died. We cats HISS.

Elsie's Bad Night

By Miss Kubelik

Yesterday's shenanigans on the House floor were so astounding and embarrassing that Nikki Haley must be grateful they happened on the same day that she came in second to "None Of The Above" in Nevada. 

Maybe pundits won't pay her loss much mind, she must have hoped — particularly when they had utter Capitol Hill chaos to focus on and the spectacle of a bruised and stung Mike Johnson running far, far away from reporters at a speed that rivaled Josh Hawley's. (Sorry, Nikki, but it turns out they did notice Nevada after all.)

Benedict Donald mocked her humiliation, as is his wont — but rubbing Haley's nose in the dirt seemed to take on additional meaning this time, bolstering the contention of many that her veep chances are zero. Why should he pick her when he has so many other bowing and scraping sycophants to choose from?

One particularly pleasing bit of fallout from the Alejandro Mayorkas debacle will surely be the denting of Elise "Elsie" Stefanik as "possible running mate" material. Benedict Donald doesn't like what the entire Republican House leadership looked like — losers. (Never mind that Trump is one of the all-time most accomplished losers himself.) Elsie had stood at the lectern to proudly predict an imminently impeached Mayorkas, only to be proven embarrassingly wrong hours later.

Ohio freshman Senator and slavering right-wing nutjob JD Vance, who has been busy licking Trump's boots on TV (and getting tossed off one show because of it), must have been thrilled. To Elsie, we simply say: "Ma'am — we don't know about this whole veep thing, but please find some clothes that fit you." We cats HISS.

A Riotously Wonderful Turn Of Events

By Zamboni

This epic day has made our furry little heads spin in delight. Benedict Donald has no immunity! House Republicans fail to impeach Alejandro Mayorkas! Ronna Romney will soon get the chance to be Ronna Romney again! Jennifer Crumbley gets hauled off to the hoosegow!

We'll have a lot to say on all of this, but one thing is on our minds tonight. Trump's response to the DC Circuit's immunity ruling was that it was "nation-destroying." 

"This cannot be allowed to stand," he bleated on his silly social media platform. "If not overturned, as it should be, this decision would terribly injure not only the Presidency, but the Life, Breath, and Success of our Country. So bad, and so dangerous for our Nation!"

Don't ask us to explain the capitalization, which is vintage Trump. But it's undoubtedly another attempt to gin up his supporters to get violent once Trump loses to Joe Biden again in November, which he surely will. So we should all get ready for a MAGA insurrection redux — but this time, things will be different. 

For one thing, a Democrat will be in the White House and, unlike January 6, will immediately call out the National Guard in DC. Likewise, no Democratic governor in a blue state will hesitate to keep the peace. But what will Republicans in the swing states do? Will Brian Kemp quell riots in Georgia? Will Joe Lombardo in Nevada?

If Ron DeSantis can dispatch the Florida Guard to "protect" Texas's border, why couldn't Gavin Newsom send the California Guard or Kathy Hochul send New York's to protect the citizens of other states from the MAGA mobs? You see what cans of worms these idiot Republicans keep opening? We cats prefer cans of tuna, and we HISS.

A New Colossus? No, Just A Colossal Republican Error

By Baxter

Remember when America was proud of the words of Emma Lazarus? "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free...I lift my lamp beside the golden door."

Well, a lot of us still believe in the poem at the base of the Statue of Liberty. But what a lot of dust MAGA Republicans are kicking up fighting about it. And what idiots they're making of themselves — opposing the bipartisan bill that the Senate has crafted to address the southern border, aid Israel, and send much-needed funding to Ukraine.

This is total craziness — particularly when the bill has been endorsed by the National Border Patrol Council, whose members aren't exactly Biden fans, and since it's being spearheaded by James Lankford of Oklahoma, one of the most ultra-right-leaning pasty faces in the Senate. In fact, Lankford seems a little stunned by it all, and has said so. And now they're scheduled to leave Washington in a few days for a two-week recess. What a clown show. 

"I do think," Democratic Senator Brian Schatz of Hawaii has tweeted, "that Republicans are underestimating how easy it will be to point out that this bill does the stuff they asked for and they suddenly opposed it because Trump wanted to deny Biden a victory. It’s quite easy to explain in the suburbs."

You go that right, Senator. We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

Drop Out, Dean

By Sniffles

Folks in the media are going to have to revisit their "no-enthusiasm-for-Biden" narrative. First, because it's full of holes, and second, because narratives are stupid and lazy. Dear journalists: Don't try to turn the news into something, please — just cover it.

Here's why. The Democratic primary in South Carolina was held yesterday, and voters turned out to give Joe Biden a 96-percent victory. This was after pre-primary polls had him winning, but by "only" 69 percent. Now, as you'd expect, the talking heads are frantically trying to wipe the egg from their faces and find something to bolster their storyline. Hey! How about an NBC News poll that has Benedict Donald ahead? (Never mind that recent national Quinnipiac poll that has Biden beating Trump by six points.)

As Jim Messina observed, the best predictive poll is to look at how people actually voted. The South Carolina results hint that the number of Democrats who think Joe Biden has been a terrific President at a challenging time — and who are quietly planning to vote for him again — is going to keep surprising clueless TV pundits.

This was very satisfying. Almost as satisfying as the fact that the ridiculous Dean Phillips came in third in South Carolina, at 1.7 percent, a whole percentage point behind that la-la-land nutcase Marianne Williamson. How sweet that is — especially after Phillips got backing from gazillionaire investor Bill Ackman (and scrubbed his campaign website of any mention of DEI right afterward). Black voters in South Carolina made it super-clear how they felt about that.

Time for Phillips to take everyone's advice and get off the pointless Presidential vanity train. We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

Woodrow, A Century On

 

By Hubie and Bertie

Woodrow Wilson died 100 years ago on February 3. He was only 67.

There's a lot of revisiting going on about Wilson's legacy these days. We cats agree that his racist past must be reckoned with. But what seems true is that Wilson was one of the most important Presidents — not because he was swell or loved — but because he set the standard for, and advocated for, the United States as a hegemonic world power, the champion of liberal internationalism.

Prove us wrong. In the meantime, we cats HISS and PURR at the same time. (And by the way, if you're looking for a top-rate Presidential biography, check out When the Cheering Stopped, by Gene Smith. Absolutely brilliant. We cats PURR.)

Numbers

By Miss Kubelik

Does President Biden really need to wear aviator sunglasses in the Oval Office? YES! — if he's doing business as... DARK BRANDON!

And Dark Brandon just delivered 353,000 new jobs in January, tons more than anyone predicted. DARK BRANDON RULES! Okay, we'll turn off the all-caps. But still and all, wildly impressive.

We cats, being Democrats, are very pleased at these economic numbers, even if it's taking the lamestream media a few weeks to catch up. The economy is doing great: Unemployment is at 3.7 percent, average hourly earnings are up, and the US leads the G7 in GDP growth. We've had the G7's best economic recovery from COVID, and the stock market is booming. So, yay!

To our fellow Democrats, here's the message: We cannot rely on the courts, which run according to their own timetables, to pulverize Benedict Donald. Yes, they will help, and yes, polls show that Trump's support would crater if he were convicted of a crime. But in the meantime, we must focus on completely destroying him and the Republicans at the polls in November. The economy will not be the only thing — but it will be a big part of everything. And these numbers are fantastic. Let's keep beating the drum. We cats PURR.

How Much Do They Need? A Lot.

By Zamboni

Google "RNC is broke," and lots of sad-sack Republican money stories pop up on your screen. And they're not new — they date from early last year, all with the same theme: Folks aren't giving. You'll also see links to sidebar stories about how unconcerned Ronna Romney is about all this.

Well, if Ronna's still sanguine, we have no idea why. According to their latest FEC report, filed yesterday, the Republican National Committee is in about the same dire straits that the Bailey Building & Loan was after the bank run. And no Donna Reed to bail them out, either.

The committee's total cash on hand is a measley $8,009,756. That's less than half than the RNC had back in 2011, when they were gearing up to face the last incumbent Democrat, President Barack Obama.

Democratic rapid response director Alex Floyd sums it up: "In real dollars, the RNC had its worst fundraising year since 1993. It also had its worst month for contributions in a decade. And to cap it off, they had a December burn rate of 137 percent, and spent more money over the past year than they’ve taken in."

(Republicans in battleground states have nothing to brag about, either. State parties in North Carolina, Arizona, Michigan and Nevada all are scraping the bottom of their financial barrels while they descend into bitter infighting, MAGA versus Never Trumpers — and, in some cases, MAGA on MAGA. You love to see it.)

There are so many reasons this is happening to our Republican friends. But one of them has to be that Benedict Donald forced Ronna Romney to clean house of all the non-Trumpy professionals and install clueless loyalists in their place. Surely that included anyone competent in the Fundraising Department. What a shame. We cats PURR.