The photo that Benedict Donald shared earlier on social media was AI-generated, and, as you can imagine, ridiculous. We won't repost it here, but it involved a nonexistent meeting in the Oval Office and a silly map. In short, he's back on that annexation train again, which means Jon Ossoff is right: Trump is spiraling. Here's a map that's much more accurate. We cats PURR.
It's been a really weird week, but there's much to feel positive about (despite what the MSM may be feeding you). Here are a few reasons why we cats are feeling optimistic in the wilting summer weather.
Despite his threats to wait until 5 PM on Monday, Graham Platner has formally withdrawn from the Maine Senate race today. For those of us used to a measure of graciousness from politicians (and yes, we realize that was a long time ago, or, at least, prior to Trump), this was a breath-exhale moment. The last thing we needed was for Platner to act like an entitled white Bernie Bro, and we're glad he didn't.
So the good Democrats of Maine can get on with nominating a new candidate to run against Susan Collins. As long as the special convention doesn't turn out to be a bloodbath, we cats think this is a good thing. It can only help gin up media coverage and enthusiasm — and of course we know now that Team Collins is disappointed (or is that "concerned"?) that they won't have the checkered Platner to run against.
The Cook Political Report updated its Governor Ratings to label four currently held GOP-held seats — Ohio, Nevada, Georgia, and Iowa — as toss-ups. (Of the four, Fox News polling has Keisha Lance Bottoms leading 52-47 in Georgia, Rob Sand leading 53-44 in Iowa, and Amy Acton leading Vivek Ramaswamy 50-49 in Ohio. The Cook ratings are subscriber-only, or we'd link to them, sorry about that.)
Meanwhile, Benedict Donald is refusing to sign the housing bill — allowing it to become law without his signature at midnight, and without any of the hoopla that Republicans had hoped would buy them good feelings with the voters come November. Sad!
The Gordie Howe Bridge between Detroit and Windsor is set to finally open July 27, after Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney — the newly acknowledged leader of the free world by no less than The Wall Street Journal — got Team Trump to agree to a deal on toll revenues. Wow, folks, this is a really beautiful bridge (see above).
Finally, OMG, L'Affaire Mitch. Est-ce-qu'il est mort, ou vivant?
Nobody seems to know. What we can report per our research is that according to DC law, the next of kin (or designated surrogate) does not have to be physically present at the bedside to direct that life support be withdrawn. However, a witness must be there with the healthcare provider when the direction is given. So, Elaine Chao's presence is not required, but a witness's is? Film at eleven.
Not much is certain right now, except for this: 1) McConnell's staff is stonewalling. 2) Senate Republicans who say they've talked to Mitch are lying. 3) The EMT team rolled him into the ambulance with "no urgency." Live your life in such a way that all this doesn't happen to you, and that people don't make fun of you when it does. We cats HISS.
We cats no longer live in New York's 21st Congressional District, thank goodness. We were recently redistricted in NY-20, but the border between being represented by MAGAt Elise "Elsie" Stefanik and Democrat Paul Tonko is maybe a block away. If someone opens a can of tuna in a house in the 21st, we hear it.
Which means that we drive around NY-21 a lot. Before yesterday's primary, we couldn't help noticing the dearth of yard signs for Republican Congressional candidate Robert Smullen — among many, many (ugly) ones at the side of the road for his Trump-endorsed opponent, Anthony Constantino.
This was strange. Smullen was officially endorsed by the New York Republican Party (hi, Ed Cox!). Surely that meant he had the full weight of county parties' organizing muscle behind him... right?
Another oddity: Constantino supporters far outnumbered Smullen stans at a candidates' forum in Saratoga Springs last week. Although bad behavior by both Constantino and his fans caused the event to spiral into chaos (see above), Smullen's lack of visibility in the crowd was campaign malpractice. If you can't turn your people out to a candidate Q&A, you won't be able to turn them out on Election Day.
Spoiler: He didn't. Smullen was crushed by Constantino by 19 points.
We cats are enjoying this very much. Smullen will be listed on the Conservative Party line on the November ballot, and now he has to figure out if he's going to stay there and fight, or throw in the towel to a guy whose hand he refused to shake after a debate in May. And while party leaders in the 21st district are grudgingly endorsing Constantino (even though he didn't meet with many of them during the primary to ask for their support), the state GOP has a conundrum on its hands — thanks to New York's weird multi-party ballot and Benedict Donald throwing a monkey wrench into everything.
(And what will "Elsie" do? Will she finally get off her ass the fence and endorse Constantino? All she's done so far is tweet an anodyne statement, saying the primary was a "hard-fought election and the voters have
spoken loudly." How bold! How trenchant!)
Take heart, New York Republicans. You're not the only ones suffering from Trump wreaking havoc in your party. Look what happened on Capitol Hill today: a canceled bill signing, a shouting match at lunch. The GOP is such a bunch of happy campers right now. We cats PURR.
(IMAGE: Alexander MacDougall, The Times-Union)
There's a nasty (i.e., very fun) fight going on between the Republicans who are vying for Elise "Elsie" Stefanik's Congressional seat in NY-21.
As we posted a little over a month ago, the Trump-endorsed candidate, Anthony Constantino, is giving a whole lot of headaches to the more traditional, state-party-blessed hopeful, Assemblyman Robert Smullen. No love is lost between these two dudes, and when they met in a debate last week, the fur kinda flew.
"Both candidates adhered to the rules of decorum during the debate, confining their statements to their allotted time and requiring little intervention from [the] moderator," Yahoo news reports. "But they continued to attack each other in harsh terms, with Constantino casting Smullen as an unknown 'C-lister' who has failed to adequately support Trump. Smullen countered that Constantino is 'unfit to serve' and noted his campaign had once hired a man accused of murder."
(Note to the file: That last bit is true. We kid you not.)
"The caustic parley that has defined the primary race spilled over when Constantino reached across his podium to offer Smullen a handshake," Yahoo continued. "Smullen ignored Constantino, gathered his belongings, and walked off the television studio set."
Wow. Smullen later explained that he wasn't going to shake hands because Constantino had sent him a mean text. (The text was not nice, but it was also ridiculous.) This gave Constantino another line of attack, and made Smullen look petty — positively Trumpy, in fact.
The snub reminded us of Ann Richards's reaction when her Republican opponent for Texas governor, Clayton Williams, pulled the same stunt on her. It was back in 1990, when Trumpian behavior was still unknown. "Oh, Clayton," she said, "that's bad." Yup. We cats PURR.
There are times when the news isn't so bad. This past week didn't qualify. Here are the stories that we found especially annoying today.
Why in the world would Governor Jared Polis commute the unrepentant Tina Peters's jail sentence? Especially now, with all the Trumpy election f*ckery going on around the midterms. This is a despicable act — and by a Democrat, no less. As Senator Michael Bennet said, Peters "broke the law, undermined our elections, and was convicted by a jury of her peers. With Trump continuing to attack Colorado, we must stand strong for our institutions and the rule of law." (And Jared, you can kiss any Presidential ambitions you had goodbye.)
In the category of "Not A Surprise," SCOTUS has refused to let Virginia use the new map that the voters endorsed and which the Virginia top court unceremoniously tossed out. You'd think we'd be used to it by now, but the hypocrisy of the Roberts Court is still breathtaking — they allowed Texas's mid-decade gerrymander, even though it wasn't approved by anybody except Greg Abbott. Maddening.
On the sporting side, about 13,000 fans turned out in Quebec City's Videotron Centre last night to watch the Montreal Canadiens beat the Buffalo Sabres — on a jumbotron, not on the ice. No players skating in front of them, but they still cheered the Habs on to victory. But hey — let's try a new expansion team in Arizona or Atlanta instead. NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman just knows it's going to work this time.
And of course the biggest and most awful thing is the rapid re-descent into Jim Crow that we're witnessing since the Supremes' Callais decision. We haven't been this depressed since they overturned Roe and Southern states rushed to deny women their bodily autonomy. But if you're looking for a way to vent your frustration, make plans to join an All Roads Lead to the South rally tomorrow. We cats PURR.
"The American people must not look away, as they have done so often in the past. They must pay attention to the President’s deterioration, and insist that the House and Senate start acting like functioning branches of the government by asking the White House to explain what is happening, without insults or evasions, before the eyes of the country and the world."
—Tom Nichols, The Atlantic
By Zamboni
Not a good weekend for Benedict Donald and his fellow warmongers. Eight million people turned out across the country yesterday for No Kings 3. CPAC was a desultory disaster. Experts are predicting that oil could hit $200 a barrel if the Iran folly stretches into June. And now Pope Leo has smacked Trump upside the head. "Jesus does not listen to the prayers of those who wage war, but rejects them," Leo said in his Palm Sunday address. "Even though you make many prayers, I will not listen: Your hands are full of blood." Whoa. We cats PURR.
(IMAGE: Michael de Adder, deadder.net)
By Miss Kubelik
NBC News is out with a new poll that shows Benedict Donald laboring under a 54 percent disapproval rating. Hmmm. If you ask us, his numbers are probably a lot worse. Oil prices have jumped, the Dow is sinking, and that's on top of the unspeakable images from Dover this weekend. As it turns out, wearing a baseball cap and looking down your pants at a dignified transfer ceremony doesn't go over well.
Trump wants us to believe that the increasing cost of gas is just a "short-term" problem (it isn't), and that it's going to "drop rapidly" (it won't). Since he's always had people driving him around and has never run an errand in his life, it hasn't occurred to him that paying more for gas has far-reaching effects: DoorDash deliverers and folks like plumbers, roofers, housekeepers, and babysitters (in short, anybody who drives to your home to provide a service) are all going to have to jack up their prices. Are you moving this summer? You'll pay extra for the truck that hauls your furniture. Going on vacation? The cost of flying or taking the train is going to climb, too. It's not going to be a pleasant summer.
Republicans are already in a panic about the elections in November. Why else would they refuse to boot Tony Gonzales out of Congress and hope that his decision to retire would suffice? They must preserve that slim majority in the House, even if it means working alongside a guy who sexted a staff member into self-immolation. We cats HISS.
We cats were already feeling pretty good this morning about everybody who showed up for Tuesday's primary in Texas. "Democratic turnout reached record levels, as more voters participated in the party’s primary than in the Republican one," CNN reported. Turnout was strong in North Carolina, too. Excellent!
And then Benedict Donald proved the interwebs rumors right and fired puppy killer Kristi Noem. Fun!
What's even better is that Noem seems to think that "Special Envoy for the Shield of the Americas," which Trump totally made up when he sacked her, is a real job. "Thank you, POTUS!" she tweeted. Donald promised to provide more details about the "shield" soon, but considering his erratic behavior, we think there's a non-zero chance that that announcement never comes.
It's also pretty amusing, if in a grim way, that the media and the tweeters and observers are treating Noem's firing as a Donald decision. Trump is in such bad shape, both physically and mentally, that Stephen Miller is running the joint like no one has since Edith Wilson back in 1919. Gossip has it that Miller highly disapproved of Noem's extramarital nookies with Corey Lewandowski — which is hilarious when you consider who he works for. And Miller no doubt didn't appreciate Noem's stumble back in January, when she said, "Everything I’ve done, I’ve done at the direction of the President and Stephen."
(Speaking of adultery, how long, do you think, before the Noems land in divorce court? "Bryon" can't have been pleased to be a prop at yesterday's House hearing, even though he left before members started asking his wife about fucking Lewandowski on the plane.)
Markwayne Mullin, meanwhile, is a subject for another post. We're holding off because there's also a non-zero chance that his "nomination," if you can call a post on Truth Social that, eventually crumbles. But although the world is better without Noem at DHS, she's done a ton of damage that has to be repaired. And the tragedy is that Trump didn't remove her for her many failures and outrages — he fired her for making him look bad on television. We cats HISS.
Now that the two Worst Persons Who've Ever Lived have plunged us into a war that nobody voted for (not Congress, not us), people are asking: What is the goal? What's the plan? What's the strategy? (Is there one?)
It's kind of hard to tell, since Benedict Donald hasn't troubled himself to speak to the nation about any of this. In fact, he's been under wraps — he must still be recovering from that endless SOTU.
Unfortunately, however, we cats know what the plan is. It's as obvious as the fake-gold gewgaws currently besmirching every surface of the Oval Office: Decapitate the Revolutionary Guard. Suppress the popular cries for democracy. Instead, install the Shah's son Reza Pahlavi as a puppet president. Once in power, Pahlavi will be free to merrily grift and graft in the finest traditions of Donald Trump.
In return, Trump will get:
In short, no nation-building here — just corruption on the scale of an entire national economy. And if anyone tries to claim that the Constitution prevents a President from unilaterally deploying the military to build his business empire, there are five to six justices on the Supreme Court who would probably disagree. We cats HISS.
There sure have been a lot of boys (we won't say "men") twisting themselves into knots to absolve their behavior lately. (Tip: The behavior we're talking about is, um, not great. Or let's just say, bad.)
The latest self-excuser is Brady Tkachuk, who helped lift the US men's team to Olympic gold against Canada last weekend, but who has been mired in the "Everything Trump Touches Dies" syndrome ever since.
Asked how he could have laughed at Donald's dissing of the US's gold-medal women's team, Tkachuk babbled incoherently. "Honestly, it was just a whirlwind of a moment that (you) can’t really control what somebody says, and it’s just caught (me) off guard a little bit."
That's so, so lame. Especially since the White House just posted an AI video that had Tkachuk calling Canadians a very rude name, and in real life, Brady is captain of the — get ready — Ottawa Senators. (Tkachuk had to admit he's been on the receiving end of a lot of pushback from Sens fans. "It’s a funny feeling when you feel their support every day. And then, within two weeks, you’re public enemy No. 1," he said. Poor Brady! How simply frightful! How humiliating! How delightful!)
The funny thing about the men's players' hemming and hawing is not just that they must realize how Trump played them — and that they got fed McDonald's hamburgers at the White House while the women's team was treated by actor Stanley Tucci to a five-star dinner in Milan.
No, it's also because their frantic apologias closely resemble all the dudes who have been waffling about their ties to Jeffrey Epstein. There are no real apologies — just "regret" that they ever associated with him, and belated references to the suffering of the victims. (Reminds us of the US men's team awkwardly trying to express their respect and admiration for their female counterparts. Doesn't fly, guys.)
We're waiting to be shown men who are worthy of being called men. Who could they be? (Aside from Stanley Tucci, of course.) We cats are willing to entertain suggestions. In the meantime, we HISS.
Ew, no.
Better yet, would you commit suicide over him? By setting yourself on fire? Good God.
Incredibly, this dude will probably be in the House tonight for Benedict Donald's SOTU. He is Tony Gonzales, Republican of Texas, and he's embroiled in a sex scandal unlike anything we've ever seen. Word has it that Tony first pressured his Congressional aide, Regina Santos-Aviles, for nude pictures via naughty texts, and then eventually coerced her into adultery. (They were both married. Gonzales has six kids.)
Santos-Aviles's husband found out, and trouble ensued. Gonzales ended the affair in June last year, after which Regina ended it all, using one of the most ghastly suicide methods available. Jeez, give us pills any time.
Things have not gone well for Tonykins lately. The affair has rocked his upcoming March 3 primary against a former Republican opponent who almost beat him in 2024. And four conservative House Republicans — Thomas Massie, Lauren Boebert, Anna Paulina Luna, and Nancy Mace — have publicly demanded he resign. (He refuses.) Meanwhile, über-Christian Preacher of the House Mike Johnson, eternally hypocritical as always and worried about his slim majority, refuses to take a position on the resignation. But never fear — Mikey will "discuss the allegations" with Gonzales. Whew, we feel better now!
We're happy to have Tony Gonzales hanging around Republicans' necks for as long as possible. More GOP tsouris in 2026! We cats PURR.
Is this where we're at in the story of American democracy? A member of Congress, who's the same party as the President, feels compelled to post this message on a widely viewed platform — just in case? It looks like we've entered the Putin-pushing-you-out-a-window phase of Trump 2.0.
If we were reporters, we would shove this in the face of every elected Republican and ask for comment. Maybe especially Lisa Murkowski's, since she said publicly that folks in her party were "all afraid."
You know who wasn't afraid? Renee Good, who told ICE storm trooper Jonathan Ross, "That's okay, dude, I'm not mad at you." And Alex Pretti, who tried to help a woman that his killers had knocked to the ground. But Republican elected officials, Republican thought leaders, Republican ex-Presidents — they're all quaking in their boots, just as Murkowski said. They are pathetic and disgusting.
Take care, Congressman Massie. In a normal world, we don't agree with you on much — but you're doing the right thing on Epstein. (And oh, gosh, we Democrats must win the midterms.) We cats PURR.
Is there any better proof that the Trumpsters have their backs against the wall than Pam Bondi's behavior in front of the House Judiciary Committee today? When you've got nothing, the theory goes, then insult, obstruct, accuse, and yell (aka, "pound the table"). They think this will make the American people forget about Jeffrey Epstein.
Thanks for playing, Team MAGA. The Epstein saga is metastasizing, and Benedict Donald and his perfidious minions can barely keep up. House Democrats — and Kentucky Republican Thomas Massie — hammered Bondi on the Epstein cover-up, forcing her to lose her cool many times. News flash: When you allow yourself to get rattled, you're losing.
Bondi must have known this, though, deep in her heart (or whatever is where her heart ought to be). She had to know that Rep. Pramila Jayapal had boxed her in on apologizing to the Epstein victims. She also had to know that Jayapal had put her front-and-center in what surely will be one of the photos of the decade. (That's a group of Epstein survivors, plus Virginia Giuffre's brother, standing behind Pamela Jo, raising their hands to say that they'd never been asked by DOJ to testify about what Jeffrey did to them.)
Props to Pramila for that — nicely done. And Bondi just got nuttier from there. Donald will surely spend hours lauding her performance on social media tonight, but they have to know they lost the day.
At one point, Bondi called Ranking Member Jamie Raskin "washed up" and "not even a lawyer." Guess again, Blondie. Jamie Raskin is indeed a lawyer, as well as an expert on something Bondi knows nothing about: the US Constitution. Raskin is a graduate of Harvard, which is slightly more respected than (cough, cough) Stetson University College of Law. But true to her alma mater's name, Bondi proved today that she's all hat, no cattle. Meanwhile, the ghost of Jeffrey Epstein isn't going anywhere. We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.
(PS: Will someone in the Trump orbit please tell Pamela Jo that the Dow is not "over 50,000 dollars"? Thank you.)
—Dwight D. Eisenhower, Supreme Commander, Allied Forces
(IMAGE: The 45th Infantry liberates Dachau, April 1945)
