Tweets We Wish We'd Written

Oh, this is so good. We cats PURR.

Smoke Gets In Our Eyes

By Sniffles

Before we get into tonight's topic, let's just back up one second to observe that wildfires are burning not just in Ontario, but in Michigan, too. The problem is that it's kind of hard to tell Canadian wildfire smoke from American wildfire smoke. But Benedict Donald doesn't care.

"The United States is being unnecessarily invaded by filthy, polluted, and unhealthy air," Trump bleated (when he wasn't indulging in endless whines about the 2020 election — which means we now should mention that NBC, ABC, and CNN declined to air him last night).

Trump has latched on to the wildfires as another excuse to threaten tariffs against our Neighbor to the North. Canadians must be awfully tired of all this. After all, they're dealing with the smoke, too (see above). Let's just say that, if they're drowning their sorrows in their air-conditioned homes, they're not doing it with American spirits and wines — since Trump has given them absolutely no reason to abandon their boycotts of US goods.

Prime Minister Mark Carney, who's been running rings around Benedict Donald recently on trade matters, had a mild but firm response to Washington's bluster. "Climate change is the responsibility of everyone," he said, after drily noting that the US has reduced its investment in clean energy. "Truly everyone — including the United States."

Donald is looking awfully tired and limp these days. During his little-watched "election fraud" speech last night, he sounded raspy and unfocused, as if he'd spent an afternoon breathing in Ontario smoke. People have speculated that his lungs are filling with fluid from CHF. We have no idea, but we're less worried about Trump than about his true-believers who will try to enforce his fascism after he is gone.

It'll take a lot to recover from the damage of Trump 2.0, but it will all start this November. In the words of Joyce White Vance, "Your vote matters. Prepare to do whatever it takes this fall to cast it. Let’s put a stop to the lies once and for all." We cats PURR.

(PHOTO: Evan Buhler, Montreal Gazette)

Target: Jon (And You)

By Hubie and Bertie

So Trump is speaking to the nation tomorrow night about — what, exactly? Iran? Greenland? Election security? A "potpourri"? We have no idea. But rumor has it that he's going to "reveal declassified intelligence" on 2020 "election fraud" in Georgia, and call duly elected US Senators Raphael Warnock and Jon Ossoff "illegitimate."

This will be Trump's newest salvo in his war against the 2026 midterms, which he knows he's going to lose. But it's not going to work, for lots of reasons. One, for us, sticks out.

First, for a little refresher course, let's step back a few years to the resignation of Georgia Senator Johnny Isakson, who stepped down in late 2019 due to health reasons. Governor Brian Kemp then appointed Kelly Loeffler to serve the remainder of Isakson's term. Loeffler was an ineffective doofus who was primarily known for her good hair. (She's head of the SBA now, and is currently stinking up the place with her performance there, too, as you'd expect.)

Anyway, Raphael Warnock beat Loeffler in the special election runoff on January 5, 2021 — the same day that Jon Ossoff beat Georgia's other Senator, David Perdue. That election flipped the Senate to the Democrats. (And we all know what happened on January 6.)

The thing is, though, after that, Warnock ran for a full term in 2022, and he won — so how by any logic could he possibly be "illegitimate"? It also means he won't be up for re-election again until 2028. By our way of thinking, then, Trump's targeting of Warnock and Ossoff is really mostly about Ossoff, who is on the ballot this fall. 

Despite Kellyanne Conway's mocking tweet back in 2017, Trump and the Republicans are scared of Ossoff — big time. And Ossoff's masterful performance during the Jay Clayton/DNI hearing today will only increase their fear (that, and the margin by which Ossoff leads the hapless, election-denying fool Mike Collins in recent polls).

Here's a swell idea that applies to both Georgia Senators: The moment Trump starts speaking tomorrow night, go to Ossoff's site (and Warnock's site) and send each of them a few bucks. Make a statement. Tell Trump you won't let him deny Georgians' votes — and yours. We cats PURR.

Cartography

  

The photo that Benedict Donald shared earlier on social media was AI-generated, and, as you can imagine, ridiculous. We won't repost it here, but it involved a nonexistent meeting in the Oval Office and a silly map. In short, he's back on that annexation train again, which means Jon Ossoff is right: Trump is spiraling. Here's a map that's much more accurate. We cats PURR.

Keep Cool

Benedict Donald is descending into new levels of madness (how scared is he of Warnock and Ossoff?), but you don't have to care. It's too hot, anyway. So put the phone down, fix a cold drink, and put on some music. The news will still be there when you get back. We cats PURR.

Let The Combat Begin

By Miss Kubelik

One thing is certain: There is no shortage of awful people in South Carolina jockeying for Lindsey Graham's Senate seat.

Nancy Mace, surely, has been working the phones since midnight. Others in the mix include Pamela Evette, Nikki Haley, Joe Wilson, Ralph Norman, Russell Fry... the list goes on. All possibilities. All gross.

The good news is that they are so many, because the best outcome would be a knock-'em-sock-'em, dirty-double-crossing cat fight of a special primary that will kick off with filing day, July 21. The primary itself could take place in mid-August. Then we'll see what happens on Election Day, November 3.

Meanwhile, the governor will no doubt appoint a fill-in Senator, who could then also compete in the primary, or just be a caretaker until whoever wins in November takes over. We don't care — as long as the candidates rip each other to shreds over the next few weeks.

One thing we don't want is for Benedict Donald to put his thumb on the scale and clear the field. But even if he does that (and he's threatening to), the Democratic candidate, Dr. Annie Andrews, would be handed an excellent talking point — something like "First, Republicans try to pick their voters by gerrymandering. Now, they're trying to pick South Carolina's possible next Senator. Dictator Donald is denying you a choice." (Team Andrews, please wordsmith it.)

Speaking of Dr. Andrews, today would be an excellent day to send her a campaign contribution. Do it for Lindsey! We cats PURR.

(IMAGE: This Lindsey Laff is being shared on social media and is AI-generated. As for the newspaper... well, IYKYK. We cats PURR.)

Time For Some Serious Bunny Butt

By Zamboni

The "sudden passing" of Lady Lindsey Graham calls for some down-the-rabbit-hole time, folks. Get ready.

For all his (many) faults, Graham was a firm supporter of Ukraine, and often served as the designated hoser-down on Benedict Donald's love for Putin (and contempt for Zelenskyy). In fact, he had just gotten back from Ukraine yesterday — Margaret Brennan of CBS reports that she spoke to him on Friday before he left Kyiv.

"He was excited to share the news that the Trump White House had finally given him the green light for Congress to move his long-sought bill to put significant financial penalties on Russia by punishing buyers of Russian oil," Brennan said. Hmmm... that doesn't sound like something Vlad would like, does it?

Now, check out this tweet by Sir William Browder, author of the Magnitsky Act.

"Not to be a conspiracy theorist," he said, "but Lindsey Graham was the leading driver of the devastating sanctions bill against Russia... he had just returned from Ukraine, where it's not unknown for Russian agents to operate. Russians are expert at administration of poisons that look like heart attacks. All tests should be done immediately to rule out foul play. I've seen enough Russian-related suspicious deaths to know this is the only course of action."

Oh, Bill, do please indulge in conspiracies. We're already awash in them with Mitch McConnell. (And here's the kicker: If Putin decided to off Lindsey, that means Benedict Donald knew. Prove us wrong.)

With Lindsey, as with Mitch, social media is the place to be for ghoulish grins today. MAGA might be appalled, but their behavior is hardly exemplary (see: Trump's tweet on the death of Robert Mueller), and besides, it's so much fun to mock the newly deceased when it's someone like Graham. As the old saying goes, the dead should make it harder for us to speak ill of them. Stay tuned for our comments on the South Carolina Senate race. In the meantime, we cats PURR.

Mitch, Still Missing

By Baxter

It's been a month, and still no explanation from Mitch McConnell's Senate office or from Senate Republicans about his current medical condition and his prolonged absence from Capitol Hill. And since we have a yawning vacuum, people (especially online) have rushed to fill it. This is no way to run a railroad.

We couldn't care less about Mitch McConnell, but we do care about transparency. Is this a dry run for the day that Benedict Donald checks out? Surely this White House would never, ever, be honest with the American people if Trump keeled over one night. We cats HISS.

(IMAGE: Mike Luckovich, Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

Tidbits And Cat Treats: Mitch, Est-il Mort? Edition

By Sniffles

It's been a really weird week, but there's much to feel positive about (despite what the MSM may be feeding you). Here are a few reasons why we cats are feeling optimistic in the wilting summer weather.

Despite his threats to wait until 5 PM on Monday, Graham Platner has formally withdrawn from the Maine Senate race today. For those of us used to a measure of graciousness from politicians (and yes, we realize that was a long time ago, or, at least, prior to Trump), this was a breath-exhale moment. The last thing we needed was for Platner to act like an entitled white Bernie Bro, and we're glad he didn't.

So the good Democrats of Maine can get on with nominating a new candidate to run against Susan Collins. As long as the special convention doesn't turn out to be a bloodbath, we cats think this is a good thing. It can only help gin up media coverage and enthusiasm — and of course we know now that Team Collins is disappointed (or is that "concerned"?) that they won't have the checkered Platner to run against.

The Cook Political Report updated its Governor Ratings to label four currently held GOP-held seats — Ohio, Nevada, Georgia, and Iowa — as toss-ups. (Of the four, Fox News polling has Keisha Lance Bottoms leading 52-47 in Georgia, Rob Sand leading 53-44 in Iowa, and Amy Acton leading Vivek Ramaswamy 50-49 in Ohio. The Cook ratings are subscriber-only, or we'd link to them, sorry about that.)

Meanwhile, Benedict Donald is refusing to sign the housing bill — allowing it to become law without his signature at midnight, and without any of the hoopla that Republicans had hoped would buy them good feelings with the voters come November. Sad!

The Gordie Howe Bridge between Detroit and Windsor is set to finally open July 27, after Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney — the newly acknowledged leader of the free world by no less than The Wall Street Journal — got Team Trump to agree to a deal on toll revenues. Wow, folks, this is a really beautiful bridge (see above).

Finally, OMG, L'Affaire Mitch. Est-ce-qu'il est mort, ou vivant?

Nobody seems to know. What we can report per our research is that according to DC law, the next of kin (or designated surrogate) does not have to be physically present at the bedside to direct that life support be withdrawn. However, a witness must be there with the healthcare provider when the direction is given. So, Elaine Chao's presence is not required, but a witness's is? Film at eleven.

Not much is certain right now, except for this: 1) McConnell's staff is stonewalling. 2) Senate Republicans who say they've talked to Mitch are lying. 3) The EMT team rolled him into the ambulance with "no urgency." Live your life in such a way that all this doesn't happen to you, and that people don't make fun of you when it does. We cats HISS.

The View From The Other Side

"Susan Collins's fight to hold onto her seat just got messier.

"Republicans had welcomed Graham Platner as a foil to Collins, who is trying to win a sixth Senate term in a state that voted for Kamala Harris in 2024. But now, while Maine Democrats prepare for an intense two-week sprint to replace Platner, Collins's team will have to start from scratch in their strategy against a new nominee — who may not be known until close to the party's July 27 deadline to declare one.

"And according to a person familiar with the campaign's thinking, Collins's team had viewed Platner as a uniquely vulnerable opponent whose personal controversies could help offset a big challenge in 2026: running as a Republican in the era of President Donald Trump.

"Polling published in late June showed Collins and Platner in an extremely close race.

"'She can certainly win, but they didn’t want to change candidates,' the person familiar with the campaign's thinking said. 'The stuff we already knew about Platner was going to propel Collins to overcome the Trump anchor. Now it’s going to be a Democrat with a cleaner record, presumably.'"

—POLITICO, July 9, 2026