Tidbits and Cat Treats — Pre-Turkey Edition

By Baxter

Oh, Lou Dobbs, please, please run for President. We cats don't care whether you're a Republican or an Independent. We just want you to suck all the oxygen out of the room, eat up a lot of money that otherwise might go to the GOP, and drive more Hispanics and minorities into the Democrats' arms. Plus, you'll be one more cartoon figure — move over, Palin, Huck and Gingrich — taking on a real President. (We do, though, find your hypocrisy astounding. A guy as rich as you doing the populist pose. Give us a break.)

Speaking of hypocrisy, consider the Catholic Church. Bishop Thomas Tobin of Rhode Island recently demanded that Representative Patrick Kennedy refrain from taking communion because of the Congressman's support for abortion rights. Sounds like a red herring to us. Tobin is trying to distract us with this faux communion issue — and what better way to grab headlines than to involve a Kennedy? — because his fellow church leaders in Connecticut have been ordered to release documents about priestly sex abuse on December 1. Stay tuned, everyone.

Why do we have the feeling that the so-called "abrupt" resignation of RNC communications director Trevor Francis was actually in the works long before, and that somebody convinced him to stay just until the November elections were over?

David Frum has gotten into more trouble with the nutbag Republican base by suggesting that GOP men like Sarah Palin a lot more than GOP women do. We cats disagree with Mr. Frum on many things, but not on this. We all know that if Palin looked like Barbara Mikulski, none of this would be happening. (Forgive us, Senator! We love you!)

Finally, we cats don't know about you, but we never want to be at an event where it's okay to announce, "We're fixin' to introduce the ladies." Which means we're glad we didn't attend the Republican Governors Association meeting. Ugh. Excuse us, but we feel a hairball coming on.

Senate Turns Back Republican Filibuster, Opens Health Care Debate

"Now, this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning."

—Winston Churchill

Do As I Say, Not As I Do

By Zamboni

One of Sarah Palin's many undesirable traits is her constant desire to have things both ways.

Example: If she'd been in elected office 30 years ago, as a right-wing Republican she surely would have campaigned against the Equal Rights Amendment. Yet today she expects us all to join her in outrage over a "sexist" magazine cover. (Sorry, ma'am, but we cats haven't cared about Newsweek since they hired Karl Rove as a contributor.)

Another example: We find it really interesting that Palin — as someone who opposes reproductive rights and believes that all pregnancies should be carried to term — seems to be falling down on the job when it comes to parenting herself.

It's a question we haven't seen posed since the great "book" tour began:

Who's taking care of that baby she had last year?

"We Can Take It!"

By Sniffles

We cats are amazed at the reaction to Attorney General Holder's (correct) decision to try the September 11 conspirators in New York. While we now fully expect the Republicans to oppose everything the Obama Administration does, they still somehow manage to surprise us with their — well, their idiocy.

We say "idiocy" because the railing right-wingers are the very people who always rush to extol all things American (and, in the process, slander those whom they find less than patriotic). But too often, they fail to understand that which they extol.

Do the Republicans not believe that an American court will render justice? Do they fear the first amendment of the Constitution? Do they doubt the mettle of Manhattanites — not to mention all other Americans?

The lack of logic is breathtaking. The Attorney General's decision is as American as apple pie. We should be standing up proudly to the rest of the world, saying, "Look at us! How many countries on the planet could be so grievously wounded and still treat the accused in such a democratic fashion?"

The right wing is very fond of quoting Winston Churchill. Funny how they can't see that a terror trial in New York could be our finest hour.

"Another Palin Story? Just Shoot Me!"

By Baxter

In an era in which anybody, no matter how ordinary, can become a celebrity, we cats would like to say goodbye to someone who was truly accomplished: the actor Edward Woodward.

Mr. Woodward first came to our attention in 1980, in "Breaker Morant." It was a film about so many serious topics — the twilight of empire, the agony of an unwinnable war, the insanity of the death penalty — that we wonder how much patience audiences would have for it today. In another of our favorites, he did a spirited turn (no pun intended) as the Ghost of Christmas Present in 1984's "A Christmas Carol."

That's just a sliver of his impressive filmography, and we cats will miss him. But we secretly suspect that he died just to get away from the relentless coverage of you-know-who's book tour.

Bow Only to Miss Manners' Judgment

By Zamboni

Oh, boy, here we go again. The right-wing nutbags must be going bananas over President Obama's latest bow to a head of state. This time it was to the Emperor and Empress of Japan, with whom he lunched in Tokyo.

While we cats see nothing terribly significant in the President's gestures and are certain he is doing them to be polite, we wish he'd cut it out. Not because it inflames the crazy base of the Republican Party (which we enjoy), but because it's simply wrong.

Decrees no less an expert than Miss Manners:

"Royal personages... do not have the right to receive physical obeisance from American citizens. One does not bow or curtsy to a foreign monarch because the gesture symbolizes recognition of her power over her subjects."

Okay, Mr. President? Can we stop now?

As for all those right-wing maniacs who frothed over a completely fabricated earlier Obama "controversy" — and you know what we mean — Miss Manners also has the final word: "The hand-over-the-heart gesture is optional for all."

Cat Fights! Deluxe Republican Edition

By Sniffles

The news is simply chock-full of Republican brawls these days. While we celebrate them all, here are a few of our faves.

Hutchison vs. Perry: We cats note with interest that Kay Bailey Hutchison, who is itching to be Governor of Texas, has decided not to resign her Senate seat after all. Perhaps she didn't want to equate herself with the recent sorry string of Republican quitters? We cats think she decided it would be too dangerous to hand a Senate appointment to her despised GOP rival, Governor Rick Perry — who could promptly solidify his standing with the whackjob base by choosing... oh, say, Lou Dobbs.

South Carolina GOP vs. Lindsey Graham: Poor little Lindsey. Far-right nuts like the folks at Free Republic have always hated him. Now his own state party has decided it likes him even less than it likes Mark Sanford. Lindsey is so unpopular back home now that we cats are wondering when, not if, that inevitable other shoe will drop.

Crist vs. Rubio: Speaking of such shoes, Florida Governor and Senate wannabe Charlie Crist has had a very rough week. He's been caught needlessly lying about his support of the stimulus plan, and now his telegenic right-wing primary opponent has been invited to keynote CPAC. We cats think Marco Rubio is a mental case, but Crist — ugh, what a revolting fake of a man.

Sarah Palin vs. Everybody: While we will spend none of our valuable time reading about the "book" tour, we are thrilled that what's-her-name's ghosted tome has reopened all those ugly McCain campaign wounds. (And P.S. to Katie Couric: Since the Alaskan quitter has accused you of leaving "substantive" interview bits on the cutting-room floor, we urge you to release all of your Palin tapes. Surely the more appropriate "S" terms for what you didn't air are "silly," "stupid," and "shockingly unqualified.")

RNC vs. The Unborn: Finally, although they are hastening to "correct" it, the fact that the RNC insurance plan covers abortion is another deliciously disgusting example of Republican entitlement. They think nothing of butting into the rest of our lives, but assume that the rules do not apply to them. We cats HISS at their hypocrisy. Did we mention how happy we are that they're not in power any more?

(IMAGE: Pelea de gatos en una despensa, Paul de Vos, 1592)

Just One More Reason Why We're Glad Bush is Out of Office

Somebody who actually cares about the soldiers who die under his watch observed Veterans Day at Arlington National Cemetery today.

UPDATE: If you don't believe us, read this account of the President's visit from The New York Daily News.

(PHOTO: Luke Sharrett, The New York Times)

Thanks, 42

By Baxter

We cats are very fond of former President Clinton. In fact, we'd go so far as to say that he would have escaped his second term completely unscathed if he'd only thought to proposition us instead of that Lewinsky girl. Of course, our scratchy tongues may have bothered him a bit. But he was clearly, um, a cat man.

Anyway, we were very pleased when we heard that Bill was heading up to Capitol Hill today to give Senate Democrats a pep talk on health care. It sounds as if he not only breathed new life into an understandably roiled caucus, he made incredible sense along the way. (And supported our post from yesterday, too.)

He said, "Just pass the bill, even if it's not exactly what you want. When you try and fail, the other guys write history.”

Bravo, Mr. President. We cats can only add the following words from a predecessor of yours: "No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings."

And to all 100 members of the Senate, we say this: It's time to find out who's a human being — and who's not. We already have plenty of nominees for the latter category. Prove that you belong in the former one.

Let's Talk Endgame

By Zamboni

What did we cats say about governing being complicated and difficult? The House version of the health care overhaul is not even 48 hours old, and an urgent fund raising appeal from the National Abortion Rights Action League has landed in our e-mail.

"The House passage of the Stupak-Pitts amendment is an outrageous blow to women’s freedom and privacy," the message says. "If this gets through the Senate, it will be tantamount to a FULL BAN on abortion access in the new system."

Sigh. We cats are not sure that Stupak-Pitts is what NARAL goes on to call it: "the greatest restriction on abortion in a generation." But let's not split hairs. Our point is, while we almost always agree with NARAL on the issues, we're going to let this one go.

Why? Because governing is complicated and difficult.

We need to give cover to all those Democrats who represent Republican-leaning Congressional districts and who voted for health care reform. It's more important to us cats to hold the House with a healthy 258-seat majority comprised of Democrats like Congressmen like Brad Ellsworth (D-IN). Because a lot of stuff has to get done.

In our view, it's not only important to get health care reform passed — it's crucial for abortion rights that we Democrats continue to control the White House and the Congress. The folks on the Supreme Court aren't getting any younger.

In the end, House members like Rosa DeLauro agreed, and voted for the bill. “I stood my ground,” the pro-choice Connecticut Democrat told Politico. “We all stand our ground. We also know, we all know, that you must focus on the endgame, and that’s to pass health care.”

So — sorry, NARAL. We cats won't be sending you any money today. We're too busy focusing on the endgame — not just health care, but Roe v. Wade. Try us again later.