De Adder Du Jour

 

Michael de Adder is just one of the best political cartoonists around. We cats wish him a happy birthday today, too! And we PURR.

(IMAGE: deadder.net)

Cat Fight! John Cornyn Vs. Ken Paxton

By Baxter

If you want to find some fun this Memorial Day weekend, look no further than Texas, where John Cornyn and Ken Paxton are scrapping like mad, wet cats before Tuesday's Republican Senate runoff.

"In a race that’s been defined by personal shots, the latest online dust-up between the two underscores the difficult path forward for the Texas GOP," POLITICO reports. "The fighting between the two camps has gotten so ugly that some Republicans are fearful it will dampen turnout in the midterms, hurt down-ticket Republicans — and possibly cost them the seat." (Yes, please.)

Meanwhile, we cats have returned from being away a few days to find the "Senate-Republicans-are-livid-about-Trump's-Paxton-endorsement" story still going strong. Kind of surprising since they're mad about a whole bunch of things — particularly about Benedict Donald's zillion-dollar terrorist slush fund. (After all, they can read a poll.)

But it's not difficult to understand they're so pissed about Trump stiffing Cornyn. John Cornyn may be an unexciting institutionalist to the MAGA faithful (and to anyone else who gives him at least a moment's thought), but in GOP circles he's been a prodigious fund-raiser. He chaired the National Republican Senatorial Committee during the 2010 and 2012 election cycles, and has always been tight with the moneybags types. And he's been generous to his Senate colleagues.

Imagine if you're a baby Republican from a state like, say, North Dakota, with a limited universe in which to raise cash. A good fund-raising friend like Cornyn can not only help get you elected/re-elected, he can help keep the Senate in your party's hands so you can taste at least a little bit of power on Capitol Hill.

If you drill down far enough — and it usually doesn't take long — you'll find that every story like this springs from a question of money. What will Senate Republicans do for spare change, without their longtime friends John Cornyn and (since he's retiring) Mitch McConnell? They could end up in the minority, and guys like Ken Paxton won't raise a dime for them. But he'll post a few mean tweets. We cats PURR.

CRAP (Congressional Republicans Always Punt)

By Sniffles

John Thune and his merry band of spineless Senate enablers were — well, not so merry today. With the entire world throwing up over Benedict Donald's billion-dollar slush fund for Trumpsters who beat cops, their reconciliation bill was stuck. Finally, they just called it a day and went home. (This was after House Republicans put the Iran war powers resolution on ice — they didn't have the votes to kill it.)

Meanwhile, Americans are paying a shit-ton more for gas, groceries, and healthcare, and the GOP — in charge of all branches of the federal government — are doing nothing about any of it. It's not governing by morons — it's complete and utter non-governing. (By morons.)

It's becoming increasingly clear that if you stand up and say no, good stuff happens. Remember, Democrats refused to bend on funding for ICE and border patrol. Eventually, the Republicans buckled and passed Homeland Security funding, thinking they would take care of the rest in reconciliation. Well, it didn't quite turn out that way, did it?

Donald, wanting billions for his silly ballroom and for insurrectionists, has put his party — you know, the one that the media say he has in an "iron grip" — in this terrible bind. And now, we have unhappy Republicans in disarray. Hanging tough pays off. We cats PURR.

Paxton Wins Endorsement — Cornyn, Senate Republicans, And Texas Kids All Lose

By Hubie and Bertie

The Republican Senate runoff in Texas is next Tuesday, May 26. And now the hapless incumbent, John Cornyn, has gotten a nasty surprise.

Benedict Donald had neglected to support either Cornyn or his crazy and corrupt primary opponent, state Attorney General Ken Paxton — even though he had promised an endorsement ages ago. Then, he somehow let it slide, and some pundits and observers were wondering if he'd just stand aside and let things play out.

Well, not anymore. Today, Trump endorsed Paxton.

Cornyn is stunned, and Senate Republicans are furious. Paxton, they believe, is the much weaker candidate, so Trump may have just handed the seat to Democrat James Talarico (wouldn't it be loverly)? Majority Leader John Thune, who had been lobbying Donald for Cornyn, tried to get past reporters without saying much of anything beyond "It's his decision." We cats offer a shake of the hand and a fat Daniel Webster cigar to the first journalist who asks, "And you're surprised?"

Any Republican who's shocked by this is too stupid to be in the Senate. But there they are. It's baffling how they continue to delude themselves about the malevolent toddler who controls their party. Each one of these guys is certain that he'll be the one to figure out, sidestep, or somehow survive Trump's wrath.

And one other thing: If they had been paying attention, they would have noticed Paxton's "settlement" with Texas Children's Hospital last week. The unholy agreement is making the hospital pay $10 million in Medicaid reimbursements (even though it denies any fraud took place), fire five doctors who provided gender-affirming care, and establish a "detransition clinic" (ugh). In other words, Texas Children's caved to Paxton and agreed to bully trans kids.

Did these shocked Republicans not figure out that maybe Paxton timed the settlement to force an endorsement in his Senate race? After all, transgender people are one of the groups at the top of Trump's hate list. It's kind of beyond coincidental, don't you think? We cats HISS.

Le Chandail De Hockey

By Miss Kubelik

The jury is out on the new Quebec premier, Christine Fréchette. Everybody hated her predecessor, but we're expecting Fréchette to still champion a separation referendum — even though a majority of Quebec voters are not interested. (Can't let Alberta have all the fun, right?)

But she sorta gets points for giving French President Emmanuel Macron a Canadiens hockey jersey today. (The name on the jersey is Canadien forward Alexandre Texier, a native of Grenoble, France).

She has to be happy that her gesture turned out not to be an empty one, since the Habs managed to eliminate the Buffalo Sabres in the Stanley Cup playoffs tonight. But we'd caution her on the fall referendum. Canada is feeling especially unified these days, and we can all thank Benedict Donald for it. Like the Republicans' efforts at gerrymandering, perhaps the Canadian separatists should be careful what they wish for — or at least come to realize that they've chosen the wrong time. We'll see. In the meantime, we cats PURR.

Large Numbers

  

By Zamboni

For awhile this morning, the lede story on the homepage of The New York Times was about its latest NYT/Siena poll, which had Benedict Donald's approval ratings — across the board — in the toilet.

It's really tough to find a historical precedent for numbers like this. You're reaching back to Richard Nixon in the last throes of Watergate (approval at 24 percent), but the poll's internals tell an even starker story. It's so bad that you'd be forgiven for expecting to see Rabbi Korff show up in the East Room soon.

Trump is underwater with Latino voters by 51 points. Down with young voters age 18 to 29 by 57 points. Lagging among independents by 43 points. These three groups were key to his win in 2024, and it makes you wonder how wiped out the Republicans would be without all their desperate, racist gerrymandering and voter suppression.

The poll also found Democrats with an eye-popping 14-percent advantage on the generic ballot — despite the corporate media's lazy drumbeat that nobody likes us. Heck, the poll shows Latinos favoring Democrats by 30 points. When will the press wake up and smell the cafecito? We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

Disrespecting Our Honored Dead

By Baxter

We cats were trying to think of the most affecting video to accompany the story about FBI Director Kash Patel's special "VIP snorkel" excursion at the USS Arizona memorial last summer.

Was it the newsreels from 1941? (Too many "Jap" references, ugh.) Or the clips from 1943's Air Force, or 1953's From To Here to Eternity? In the end, we decided on Pearl Harbor (2001), which, despite its faults, really packed a punch about how ordinary people — military and non-military alike — experienced the attack.

We're only doing this to (we hope) show how disrespectful it was for FBI Idiot-in-Chief and third-rate podcaster Kash Patel to have snorkeled above the USS Arizona memorial last year.

VIP snorkels are only granted on rare occasions. As in: You have the cremains of an Arizona survivor, and you want to scatter them there. Otherwise, recreational excursions are strongly discouraged.

Benedict Donald has already called the Americans who fell at Normandy "suckers and losers." Now, we have this Patel party dive on the Arizona. How revolting. And how much more will it take for Americans to turn on these Trumpsters? We cats HISS.

"Play-It-Down-The-Middle" Bill Cassidy Loses Big

By Sniffles

Louisiana Senator Bill Cassidy lost his primary for re-election yesterday. In fact, he came in third. The last Republican Senator to come up this short was Luther Strange in Alabama, in 2017.

But Luther Strange didn't vote to convict Benedict Donald in his second impeachment trial. So there you go. (We'll see if the Trumpsters can similarly unseat Kentucky Rep. Thomas Massie on Tuesday.)

We cats are not crying big tears over Dr. Cassidy, since he compromised all his principles to shepherd through RFK Jr.'s confirmation as HHS secretary. Sorry, Bill — you've actually also violated your Hippocratic oath. Allying with the Trumpsters not only has put Americans at risk but has been a death sentence for thousands of people abroad who depended on support from USAID. We don't know how you can live with yourself, but perhaps you have some innovative coping mechanisms.

Anyway, as the saying goes, Everything Trump Touches Dies. The other interesting aspect of yesterday's election is that Democratic turnout was nearly 345,000 votes — a respectable number in a crazily red state. We're thinking that people of color and other minorities don't like it when the ruling class decides to try to erase them. Maybe they channel that anger by turning out to vote instead. We cats PURR.

Tidbits And Cat Treats: Stuff We Don't Love Edition

By Hubie and Bertie

There are times when the news isn't so bad. This past week didn't qualify. Here are the stories that we found especially annoying today.

Why in the world would Governor Jared Polis commute the unrepentant Tina Peters's jail sentence? Especially now, with all the Trumpy election f*ckery going on around the midterms. This is a despicable act — and by a Democrat, no less. As Senator Michael Bennet said, Peters "broke the law, undermined our elections, and was convicted by a jury of her peers. With Trump continuing to attack Colorado, we must stand strong for our institutions and the rule of law." (And Jared, you can kiss any Presidential ambitions you had goodbye.)

In the category of "Not A Surprise," SCOTUS has refused to let Virginia use the new map that the voters endorsed and which the Virginia top court unceremoniously tossed out. You'd think we'd be used to it by now, but the hypocrisy of the Roberts Court is still breathtaking — they allowed Texas's mid-decade gerrymander, even though it wasn't approved by anybody except Greg Abbott. Maddening.

On the sporting side, about 13,000 fans turned out in Quebec City's Videotron Centre last night to watch the Montreal Canadiens beat the Buffalo Sabres — on a jumbotron, not on the ice. No players skating in front of them, but they still cheered the Habs on to victory. But hey — let's try a new expansion team in Arizona or Atlanta instead. NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman just knows it's going to work this time.

And of course the biggest and most awful thing is the rapid re-descent into Jim Crow that we're witnessing since the Supremes' Callais decision. We haven't been this depressed since they overturned Roe and Southern states rushed to deny women their bodily autonomy. But if you're looking for a way to vent your frustration, make plans to join an All Roads Lead to the South rally tomorrow. We cats PURR. 

First Nations Should Come First

By Miss Kubelik

Quite a smackdown yesterday for the silly separatists in Alberta, Canada. A judge in Calgary squashed their petition for an independence referendum, saying that Alberta should have checked in with its Indigenous citizens and how they think secession would affect their treaty rights.

No surprise that the Maple MAGA white guys who want to leave Canada brushed the First Nations off. But how sad for them, since they swore they had collected well over the 178,000 signatures needed to force the referendum onto October's ballot. (They also managed to screw up by posting the private data of almost three million Albertans on the interwebs, and somebody may get hauled off the hoosegow over it.)

Moral of the story: You can't hold a referendum on whether to take something that isn't yours in the first place — like land covered by treaties that predate the creation of your province. The separatists' racism and sense of entitlement blinded them to this simple fact. We cats HISS and them and PURR at everything else.

"Be Very Careful What You Pray For"

By Zamboni

The world is on tenterhooks, waiting for the results of FBI Director Kash Patel's alcohol test.

LOL. Like it's gonna happen.

So let's talk about something that did happen: The South Carolina state senate has refused to consider redistricting itself for the 2026 midterms. The vote was 29 to 17. The Republican governor didn't back redrawing the districts, either, but last week, the state house went ahead and passed a calendar extension to get it done. Yesterday's senate vote was a smackdown of that vote — and of Benedict Donald.

None of this especially noble. The state senators didn't suddenly wake up and realize how wrong it would be to erase the votes of more than a million Black citizens. They just didn't think they could redraw the maps in time for an early June primary. And maybe they took note of Jim Clyburn's warning the other day: Trying to wipe out his district could put three and maybe four Republican seats in play. We cats PURR.

Rock-A-Bye, Donald

By Baxter

After the rumpus that the media kicked up over Joe Biden's debate performance nearly two years ago, why don't journalists ask what the heck is up with Benedict Donald? Biden's bad debate was a single event. But Trump has appeared both mentally and physically compromised for months, in many different ways.

Today, he fell asleep during a public event (again). He can't walk a straight line from Marine One to the White House, and he when he descends the stairs from Air Force One, he grips the handrails for dear life. Every month he disappears for days at a time, and then re-emerges with bruises on the back of his hands, slathered in bad makeup.

He rarely holds road rallies now, and when he does go out in public, there are strange bulges under his suit that suggest Foley catheters or ventricular assist devices (placed as a bridge to a heart transplant).

Yes, it's an old saw at this point, but can you imagine if Joe Biden did stuff like this? Jake Tapper would be busy churning out his seventh book. (That's how many deadly sins there are, you know.)

The press's lack of curiosity has naturally left the rest of us to indulge in speculation. Currently, the favored narrative is that Team Trump is quietly preparing not just for a Democratic Congress (yes, please) but for a time, perhaps soon, when Donald is decedent or completely incapacitated — when the ruse can't be sustained anymore, even with our compliant, knee-bending media. The question in our furry minds is: What, if anything, are the Trumpsters telling Vance? We're guessing, not much. It might be the most flagrant instance of keeping a veep in the dark since Roosevelt and Truman in 1945. We cats HISS.

You Should Be Dancing, Yeah

By Sniffles

Sir David Attenborough's birthday bash in London wasn't the only fabulous party this weekend. Hungary's new Prime Minister, Péter Magyar, took the oath of office yesterday in Budapest amid daylong celebrations that inspired some, shall we say, ecstatic moves from the incoming Health Minister, Zsolt Hegedűs.

Here's a reminder, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls: The Trumpsters were so openly rooting for Hungary's far-right, anti-EU autocrat, Viktor Orbán, that they sent the Vice President of the United States, JD Vance, over there last month to campaign for him. Disgusting and humiliating — for Vance. Orbán lost in a landslide. Someday, Americans will be able to dance like this, too. We cats PURR.

Sir David At 100, Part Deux

 

Big party at the Royal Albert Hall last night. It looks like a lot more fun than the Bezos-benighted Met Gala this week. The only problem with this video is that there are no cats in it. But we PURR anyway.

Peace, Not Apartheid

By Hubie and Bertie

Full disclosure: We cats are white. And we couldn't care less about the prediction that by 2045, the United States will become a minority-majority country. Are we falling down on the job as the dominant caste? Should we be defending our whiteness more?

Nah. In fact, total nah.

Who cares about that crap? In a democracy like America claims to be, racial imbalances are not supposed to matter, right? But — oh! Maybe we're not really a democracy, or white folks wouldn't be so worried about being outnumbered. Is that it? Yep, that's probably it.

There's always been a gap between what the US stands for and what it really is. We all know this. Thomas Jefferson may have written that famous line about everybody being created equal, but he was an enslaver, and his definition also didn't include non-property-owners, or Indigenous people, or women. But his words are immortal — so we've spent the last 250 years trying to live up to them. Sometimes we've done well. Most often, we haven't. It's a continuing struggle.

Even knowing this, though, it's been mighty dispiriting to see the developments over the last week: the Supreme Court obliterating the Voting Rights Act, the Southern states' rush to gerrymander Black people out of existence, and Virginia's top court tossing the Commonwealth's new map out on a technicality.

The Republicans' goal is clear. They're freaked out about 2045, so they're trying to make America a 21st-century version of apartheid South Africa, through draconian immigration enforcement and voter suppression. To see what they're doing in Tennessee, as just one example, is wildly depressing. But we can't believe they'll be successful in the long term.

First, the political and economic forces against the GOP in 2026 are just too strong to overcome. In a wave election, all the gerrymandering and suppressing in the world still won't be able to cancel out the will of the voters. (Important message here: Let's make it a wave, everybody. It doesn't happen without us.)

Second, the United States of America is a far more diverse country than apartheid South Africa ever was. We are too big and too cumbersome for minority rule to be effectively enforced (apartheid South Africa was, at most, 40 million people, with Black Africans accounting for 75 percent, while the current population of the US is 340 million, with 50 million identifying as Black). Still, the racist Trumpsters will try for it. But we have to believe most people in the US are not okay with segregation. Paws crossed.

We have our marching orders. The states will continue to wrangle over redistricting, but we have to keep registering people and getting out the vote in numbers like we've never seen before. We must have that wave election — not just to recapture the House, but also the Senate.

And once we do manage to get back into control, we have to follow South Africa's example in one respect: Hold a Truth & Reconciliation Commission. Unless we grapple with our racist, enslaving past, and are willing to extend the American dream of life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness to all people, we'll still fall short of the ideal that the Founders envisioned. We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

(IMAGE: Nicole Hester, The Tennessean)

Sir David At 100

By Miss Kubelik

On this, the eve of naturalist Sir David Attenborough's centenary — which, we're happy to say, he's with us to celebrate — we cats are in search of some gentler news.

So what better opportunity to revisit his memorable walk through the Buckingham Palace gardens with Queen Elizabeth in 2018?

You have to think that the Queen's interest in global warming was encouraged by her son Charles, but also by her keen sense of succeeding generations and what issues and challenges they will face. (The impending collapse of the Atlantic Meridional Overturning Circulation is our latest freakout, not to mention the 2026 El Niño, which promises to wreak some additional havoc this year.)

"I won't be here then," the Queen said, quite sensibly, eight years ago. But the rest of us are, at least for now. And in spite of everything, the United States is still the country the world looks to on existential issues like climate change. We have to lead on it, which means that we have to vote all these Trumpsters and Republicans out of office — this year, in 2028, and beyond. Let's get working, everyone. In the meantime, happy birthday, Sir David. You inspire us all. We cats PURR.

Chedrick Crushes It

By Zamboni

The press is buzzing about all those Indiana Republicans who got their heads handed to them in yesterday's primary election there (except for the one high-profile Trump resister who survived). But there was also a special election in Michigan, which (as you'd imagine, given the state of journalism today) isn't getting nearly as much attention.

Democrat Chedrick Greene was elected to the Michigan State Senate, which will keep the chamber in Democrats' hands until the end of 2026. Greene is replacing a Democrat who was elected to the US House of Representatives, and he'll run for a full term in November. Meanwhile, the Republican he defeated yesterday will have to earn his place on the November ballot in a contested GOP primary in August. (Greene is unopposed on the Democratic side.)

What's astounding, once again, is that Greene won big with 60 percent, in a district that Kamala Harris won in 2024 by just one point. Hello, everyone! We Democrats are still overperforming like gangbusters, but you wouldn't know it from reading corporate media. The story in The New York Times made absolutely no mention of Greene's margin of victory — journalistic malpractice, as far as we're concerned.

So forgive us if we find this result more important at the moment than Trump retribution in a solid-red state like Indiana. We cats congratulate Chedrick Greene, and we PURR.

Dear Donald, We All Hate You

By Baxter

Washington Post owner Jeff Bezos and his blow-up sex-doll wife may be presiding over the Met Gala tonight, but his newspaper, along with Ipsos, just published a poll that shows Benedict Donald in deep doo-doo. (Bezos's paper also won a Pulitzer Prize in Public Service today, in spite of everything he's done to destroy it.)

But back to the poll. It's brutal.

• Sixty-two percent of respondents disapprove of Trump overall.
• Seventy-two percent disapprove of how Trump is handling inflation.
• Seventy-six percent disapprove of how Trump is handling the cost of living.
• Sixty-six percent disapprove of how Trump is handling Iran.
• Sixty-five percent disapprove of how Trump is handling relations with our allies.

Have we ever seen numbers like this? This might be one instance in which Trump's bombast is justified (but of course about the wrong things, from his point of view). We cats will try not to ask how the media would handle this if it were about Joe Biden.

Well, we know the answer to that. Meanwhile, Republicans are saddled with catastrophe, but still don't seem to be able to grab an off-ramp from the disaster that is Donald. They won't support a War Powers Resolution, pull back their support for ICE, or condemn the non-release of the complete Epstein files. To those of us clear-thinking Americans, any one of these stances seems commonsense and obvious. But they're caught between a rock and a hard place — partially because they've already gerrymandered themselves into ruby-red districts where it would be fatal for them to break with Trump.

Meanwhile, the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee has added eight newly competitive candidates to their "Red to Blue" initiative — including two in Texas's recently redistricted map, LOL.

You know, it's only May, and a long way to November. But you'd be tempted to think that things have gotten so dire for the Trumpsters and the GOP that try as they might, they won't be able to redraw their way out of it. That would be hilarious, and would make us cats PURR.

Rococo Loco

"The White House was designed by James Hoban, an Irish architect who migrated to the US for economic opportunities (what a great American story!). He originally designed it in the Neoclassical style, drawing on Palladian and Georgian influences.

"Neoclassicalism was a reaction against the Rococo movement, which reactionaries saw as overly ornate and frivolous. A bit of gold used sparingly and strategically can look fine in a Neoclassical building, but the amount Trump used has so radically encrusted the room that it's now in Rococo territory, making it look like a mismatch of aesthetics.

"The Oval Office offends on at least three levels: the ersatz nature of the decor, the way it grates against Hoban’s Neoclassical vision, and the way it misunderstands the classical-republican symbolism that the White House was meant to project in the first place.

"As others have noted, this is the kind of decor you'd expect from dictators who rob their own country."

—Derek Guy, on Twitter

Geography

We don't know how Round One of the Stanley Cup playoffs will end up, but we can say for sure that the island of Montréal looks like this right now. (Even after last night's game.) We cats PURR.

Our Plan

This says it all. We cats PURR.

Charles Schools The Trumpsters

"The Founding Fathers were bold and imaginative rebels with a cause. Two hundred and fifty years ago— or, as we say in the United Kingdom 'just the other day'—they declared independence. By balancing contending forces and drawing strength in diversity, they united 13 disparate colonies to forge a nation on the revolutionary idea of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

"They carried with them, and carried forward, the great inheritance of the British Enlightenment—as well as the ideals which had an even deeper history in English common law and Magna Carta.

"These roots run deep, and they are still vital. Our Declaration of Rights of 1689 was not only the foundation of our constitutional monarchy, but also provided the source of so many of the principles reiterated, often verbatim, in the American Bill of Rights of 1791.

"And those roots go even further back in our history: the US Supreme Court Historical Society has calculated that Magna Carta is cited in at least 160 Supreme Court cases since 1789—not least as the foundation of the principle that executive power is subject to checks and balances.

"This is the reason why there stands a stone, by the River Thames at Runnymede where Magna Carta was signed in the year 1215. This stone records that an acre of that ancient and historic site was given to the United States of America by the people of the United Kingdom, to symbolize our shared resolve in support of liberty, and in memory of President John F. Kennedy."

—King Charles III, Address to Congress, April 29, 2026

In All Our Hearts Command

By Sniffles

It's been a crappy week, thanks to the Supreme Court, the Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals (google "mifepristone" to find out why), and Benedict Donald posting another ridiculous Jesus meme that his evangelical apologists will refuse to find outrageous. But once again, the world of sports — specifically, hockey — is providing some reassurance.

Quick back story: Did you know that the Buffalo Sabres start each home game with both the Canadian and the American national anthems, even if the Sabres aren't playing a Canadian team? That's because so many Ontarians cross the border to attend. Or at least, they did before Trump started threatening and insulting them.

So it was pretty swell the other night when the anthem singer's mic cut out and the 19,000 fans in the arena immediately rushed to her rescue and sang "O Canada" for her. (Note: Thanks to Trump's tariffs and his menacing jokes about annexation and "the 51st state," one can assume that Canadians' presence in the crowd was sparse. These were overwhelmingly American fans who knew "O Canada" well.)

Donald Trump is a disaster for America and the world. But this terrific moment in the KeyBank Center is a reminder that bullies like him are destined to fade. Well done, Buffalo. We cats PURR.

Banning The Bolt

These Trumpy days call for welcome distractions, and the Montréal Canadiens are providing one. Game Six against the Tampa Bay Lightning in Round One of the Stanley Cup playoffs is tomorrow night, giving the Habs the chance to wrap things up on home ice. Meanwhile, Hydro-Québec has made it clear who they're rooting for by removing the lightning bolt from their logo. Fabulous and fun! We cats PURR.

De Adder Du Jour

(IMAGE: Michael de Adder, deadder.net) 

Happy Harper Lee Centenary To All Who Celebrate!

"Neighbors bring food with death and flowers with sickness and little things in between. Boo was our neighbor. He gave us two soap dolls, a broken watch and chain, a pair of good-luck pennies, and our lives. 

"Atticus was right. One time he said you never really know a man until you stand in his shoes and walk around in them. Just standing on the Radley porch was enough."

Who's In Disarray? (Hint: It's Not Us.)

By Hubie and Bertie

Governor Ron DeSantis may have unveiled his Florida gerrymander map, but one of its biggest critics, eight-term GOP Representative Daniel Webster, has just announced his retirement from Congress. Gee. When he was first elected, Webster was one of the craziest members of the Republican caucus. Now, he seems like one of the saner ones. That's what 25 years of gerrymandering have wrought.

However, the jury is out on the fate of DeSantis's map. Sabato's Crystal Ball rates at least one of the newly proposed GOP pickups as a toss-up, and an additional two as merely Leans Republican, throwing the whole rosy scenario into uncertainty. In short, be careful what you wish for — especially in a dicey year for Republicans like 2026.

Meanwhile, down in Texas — the seat of all these silly mid-decade reapportionment shenanigans — Democratic Senate nominee James Talarico is beating both John Cornyn and Ken Paxton in head-to-head match-ups in the polls. That's fun in and of itself, but check out Talarico's eye-popping margins among Independent and self-described moderate voters: He's leading by more than 20 points with Independents, and by more than 40 with moderates.

Holy smokes! If we were Republican, we'd be freaking out right now, because the GOP primary is doing absolutely nothing to help either Cornyn or Paxton with either group. Delicious!

We Democrats have been throwing money at Texas for years now, with nothing to show for it. If you're tempted to send Talarico a contribution, we won't stop you. But bear in mind, he's been a fundraising juggernaut. Maybe spread your love around to other Democratic candidates in Ohio, North Carolina, Alaska, Michigan, New Hampshire, and Georgia right now? Then we'll get back to you. We cats PURR.

Change Of Pace

 

This is a super-duper arrangement of "Layla," and, if you're feeling a little frazzled, a great way to start your week. We cats PURR.

Hillary Was Right About Everything, Part Eleventy-Million, Two Hundred Thousand Thirteen

"While the [Osama bin Laden] raid ultimately happened on Sunday night, Saturday night was first raised as a possibility. But someone pointed out that Obama was scheduled to be at the Correspondents' Association dinner that night, and his absence (and that of other top administration officials) could tip off the journalist-filled room that something was up.

"At which point, Hillary Clinton looked up and said simply, 'Fuck the White House Correspondents' dinner.'"

"You Helped Create This Monster, And Now You're Profiting Off Him"

By Miss Kubelik

On the eve of the ever-awful White House Correspondents Dinner, let's revisit Michelle Wolf's brilliant performance from 2018.

And let's all recall that the inside-the-Beltway journalists took great umbrage when Wolf called them out for their adoration of Donald. Sadly, nothing has changed. It may, actually, have gotten worse.

But here's one real difference between then and now: Trump, his family, and his Administration are plundering the US Treasury and fleecing foreign powers for billions.

Since the Republicans aren't inclined to do anything about it, we all have to wait for Democrats to take over — first Congress, and then the White House. At that point, we'll take a lesson from Watergate, and follow the money. In the meantime, we cats HISS.

J. Edgar Boozer

 

Every Little Breeze Seems To Whisper Louise

By Zamboni

If you're looking for something to propose in response to Benedict Donald's ridiculous Third Reich-y Washington "arch," folks on social media have the perfect solution: a towering monument to State Senator Louise Lucas, who championed the redistricting referendum that Virginia voters passed yesterday.

Republicans, who kicked off all this redistricting nonsense with their power grab in Texas (a question which, by the way, they never put directly to the voters), immediately asked the Tazewell County circuit court to pause certification of the amendment, which was granted. 

But they're just delaying the inevitable. "Republicans have repeatedly taken challenges to the Virginia referendum to a local judge in the most conservative part of the state to get silly rulings that are immediately overturned on appeal," Democratic Rep. Don Beyer said. "The Virginia Supreme Court will have the last say on the referendum."

Benedict Donald must see the writing on the wall, because he's bleating about "RIGGED" elections again. What a pathetic, projecting loser. "What started in Texas didn’t stay in Texas, and what started here will not stay here either," Senator Lucas said. "Virginia sent a message: If you try to rig the system, we fight back. If you try to take powers from voters, we will take it right back." Can someone please get started on that Lucas statue? Meanwhile, we cats salute her, and we PURR.

Nightmare In NY-21

 

By Baxter

Every time we're even vaguely tempted to feel sorry for Republicans yoked to the antics of Benedict Donald, we instantly remind ourselves that they made their bed, and they must lie in it. (See above.)

They passed up so many off-ramp opportunities in the last 10 years. And now, things are much worse for them. Trump 2.0 is way more erratic and weird. MAGA is furious about the Epstein files, the war in Iran, and gas and food prices. Impeachment and the 25th amendment are openly discussed. And Donald just made the GOP's upcoming midterm massacre even bloodier — at least in our neck of the woods.

"President Donald Trump endorsed the CEO of a sticker company to fill outgoing Rep. Elise Stefanik's House seat," POLITICO reports, "[announcing] over social media Tuesday that he's backing Republican Anthony Constantino over Assemblyman Robert Smullen, the preferred nominee of the New York GOP and the state Conservative Party."

Constantino is a nutcase, and Smullen is pretty awful, too. With Trump's interference, what was already promising to be a fun Republican-on-Republican cat fight for Elsie's seat just got more delicious. And what a huge middle finger to GOP state party chair Ed (Tricia Nixon) Cox and the hapless county chairs in the district who had confidently endorsed Smullen before Sticker Mule Man jumped into the race.

As for Elsie, she's on her silly book tour, and no doubt will try to dodge questions. But Trump has just put her in another awkward position. Can she really stay silent? Reporters should hound her mercilessly.

Here's the best part: Smullen is guaranteed to be on the November ballot, on the Conservative Party line. If Constantino wins the Republican primary in June, we don't see how Democrat Blake Gendebien loses a three-way race. We cats PURR.

Happy Queen Elizabeth Centenary To All Who Celebrate!

 

April 21, 1926—September 8, 2022

Labor Pains

By Sniffles

If you've ever had a bad boss, you can imagine how relieved staffers at the Department of Labor must feel tonight.

Because Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer is out. Like Attorney General Pam Bondi before her, she is allegedly "returning to the private sector." Wherever she (God forbid) lands, you can only imagine she'll continue to terrorize employees with her boozing, her absences, her inappropriate requests, her misuse of financial and other resources, her affairs, and her handsy husband. Ugh. (And gee, drinking on the job. Can Kash Patel's defenestration be far behind?)

Although Chavez-DeRemer was really the only non-100-percent-MAGA person in the Cabinet — some in organized labor, like the Teamsters and the Transport Workers, supported her nomination — we cats agree with House Democratic Leader Hakeem Jeffries: The Republicans who keep voting to confirm clowns like her are just as much to blame for this screwy Cabinet as anyone. And sadly, they'll probably vote for whatever worse clown Benedict Donald picks to take her place.

Meanwhile, we'll keep playing the "What If Biden Did This?" game. Can you imagine if Joe, or any Democratic President, had lost so many senior people to scandal in his first 16 months in office? The media would have a feeding frenzy. But with Trump, a new and different outrage will keep us all spinning on the hamster wheel by tomorrow. Besides, the White House press corps is about to honor Trump at their upcoming silly dinner, so they're not about to hold him to account. (Of all the years to boycott the WHCD, this is the year to boycott it the most.) We cats HISS.

(IMAGE: Now-former Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer blows out candles at an office birthday party that she said under oath had never taken place. Whoops.)

The Wheels On The GOP Bus Are Coming Off

Please allow this lovely video to brighten your Sunday.

Meanwhile, the special elections roll on. Tuesday, Virginians will go to the polls to vote on redrawing their Congressional districts for the 2026 midterms. This fight wouldn't be happening if the Texas GOP hadn't started it, so if Republicans end up with just one Representative from the Old Dominion, they'll have only themselves to blame.

Are you a voter in Virginia? To check the status of your registration and for information on polling place locations, click here.

Magyar Deep-Sixes MAGA

By Hubie and Bertie

Another lopsided victory for Democrats in a special election last night: Analilia Mejia won Governor Mikie Sherrill's former seat in NJ-11 by 60-40. We can quibble later about whether Mejia would have been our first choice in the primary. The more important point is that she outperformed our 2024 margin in that district by five points, and bested Kamala Harris's Presidential margin there by 12 points.

People are motivated, and they keep voting in outsize numbers. This is what we need for November.

That point was proved by the election in Hungary last weekend. So many pundits and prognosticators said that Victor Orbán would never have to worry about relinquishing power because of how deeply he had gerrymandered the country, and taken over the media and the courts. But Péter Magyar's Tisza party's margin of victory was so enormous, there was no disputing it. Orbán caved. MAGA is sad.

(True to form, Benedict Donald promptly put his good buddy Orbán firmly in the rear-view mirror, because, you know, Orbán's a loser, and everything with Trump is transactional. Plus it's so convenient to just let JD Vance absorb the humiliation, right?)

Maybe the best thing about Magyar's huge win — aside from cutting off Hungary's version of CPAC from any further funding — is his speedy vow to shut down Orbán's version of Fox News/One America/Newsmax. Magyar called it "a factory of lies" and promised to create a "real, independent public broadcaster, one where the opposition finally has a voice too." As the saying goes, this is how you do it. Democrats, we hope you're taking notes, because the poll numbers for both the House and Senate this November are looking good. We cats PURR.

(PHOTO: Getty Images)

"Treason Worship Shouldn't Be Tax-Deductible"

By Miss Kubelik

Let's all just sidestep the repulsive news about Eric Swalwell, Benedict Donald's continued weird Jesus meltdown, and the deliciousness of JD Vance's sparsely attended rally in Athens, Georgia, to celebrate recent developments in the Commonwealth of Virginia.

Governor Abigail Spanberger has been impressive in her first 100 days — giving the Democratic response to Trump's silly State of the Union, signing a flurry of executive orders in support of housing, healthcare, and education, and backing legislation to enshrine reproductive rights in the state constitution. Now she's signed a bill that ends tax breaks for groups aligned with the former Confederacy. Only 161 years after Lee's surrender at Appomattox, but heck, we'll take it!

The affected organizations include the United Daughters of the Confederacy's Virginia division and the Confederate Memorial Literary Society, and for the life of us we have no idea why they didn't pay state property taxes in the first place.

"And oh, the horror," humorist and Substack star John Fugelsang wrote. "Somewhere, a bunch of genteel Lost Cause enthusiasts are clutching pearls —and wallets: 'If our Confederate organizations now have to pay property taxes, how will we continue honoring our ancestors who fought to keep other people as property?'"

Yes, the South lost the war but won the peace, thanks to the federal abandonment of Reconstruction, a hundred years of Jim Crow, and romantic literary and Hollywood treatments that whitewashed America's original sin right out of our collective consciousness. But there's no reason that taxpayers of the Old Dominion need to support Confederate monuments and mythologies. We cats PURR.

Time To Take The Keys Away

"This is not the behavior of a stable, healthy leader. Pope Leo, for his part, said he has no fear of the Administration and will continue to preach the messages of the Gospel. The rest of us, however, should be very worried about a Commander in Chief who is trying to govern the country between social-media binges, who attacks religious leaders in narcissistic frenzy, and who imagines himself as a deity. If an elderly parent did such things, most people would be concerned. The President doing such things is far more alarming.

"The American people must not look away, as they have done so often in the past. They must pay attention to the President’s deterioration, and insist that the House and Senate start acting like functioning branches of the government by asking the White House to explain what is happening, without insults or evasions, before the eyes of the country and the world."

—Tom Nichols, The Atlantic

How The Veep Sweeps Matter

By Zamboni

Eighty-one years ago today, Franklin D. Roosevelt died in Warm Springs, Georgia — stunning a world that had no idea how sick he really was. Most stunned of all was probably his Vice President, Harry S. Truman, who had been picked as a running mate only the year before. FDR probably didn't handle the Truman selection as gracefully as he could have, but it soon became clear that he'd made the right choice.

Some Presidents select their running mates wisely. (Walter Mondale is a case in point.) Others make really stupid choices — and then humiliate them in a million ways. Which brings us to the subject of JD Vance.

Vance has just suffered not one but two major embarrassments in less than week. He was dispatched to "negotiate" with Iran over the Strait of Hormuz, and he was sent to Hungary to campaign for the despicable strongman Victor Orbán. Iran rolled us in the first instance (and we're all about to pay more at the pump because of it) — and Hungary just overwhelmingly handed Orbán his walking papers. Orbán quickly conceded today's election, but surely only because the margin of victory for his opponent was so wide, he had no other choice.

There are two lessons for us here: One, the best way to defeat a fascist is to do it so resoundingly that he can't possibly claim fraud. Two, the person you pick to step in if you: 1) go under anesthesia, 2) unexpectedly suffer a cerebral hemorrhage at the Little White House, or 3) keel over in the golden-gewgawed Oval Office from too many Double Whoppers, really matters. We cats salute Harry Truman, and dump our dirty litter boxes over JD Vance's head. And we PURR.

Artemis Perfect

 "We went out to dinner and listened to re-entry in the car. Everything has been so shitty and nothing has been good, we really needed this win. So glad everything worked out. Welcome home."

Liberal Love-In

By Baxter

The Canadian Liberal Party is meeting this week in Montreal, and will wrap up tomorrow with an address by Prime Minister Mark Carney at 2 PM. No, we cats aren't there (yet), but we agree with former Prime Minister Justin Trudeau that for first-time convention attendees, to be able to meet in Montreal is something special.

A year ago, we cats would never have thought we'd write this, but the Liberals are riding high. They not only have historically positive approval ratings, they're also on the brink of a majority, thanks to a few by-elections that are scheduled for April 13. (Merci, Donald!)

Two elections are in reliably Liberal ridings, and the third is in Terrebonne, outside of Montreal, which the Liberals won last time by — literally — one vote. That result was tossed by the courts, and the re-vote is Monday. But because of the recent floor-crossings, Mark Carney doesn't need Terrebonne to get a majority.

Carney has been wily and smart, keeping his caucus together and wooing newcomers, inviting them to join his "big tent." This is all very impressive for an international banker who wasn't exactly known as a savvy politician before 2025. But as he is with the French language, Carney is a quick study. We cats admit it: We're star-struck.

Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre, meanwhile, is in a bad place. How many more defections can he survive before his party demands he resign? We're already seeing calls for him to step down, because his brand of "Maple MAGA" is just not playing well in Canada. And why should it? PP is incapable of surveying the landscape and pivoting to address the reality — all he knows are the talking points that Benedict Donald provides him, and they don't translate well. C'est comme ça que ça devrait être. We cats PURR.

Is The Other Stiletto Heel About To Drop?

By Sniffles

Remember that scene in All the President's Men where the Nixon spokesperson pre-emptively denies that the White House had anything to do with the Watergate break-in? To Woodward and Bernstein (or rather, Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman), that was an intriguing tell.

The same kind of thing happened today. Moose & Squirrel made a speech in which she gratuitously brought up Jeffrey Epstein and declared, "I never been friends with Epstein." (Yes, that's a real quote from a woman who allegedly got an Einstein visa to enter the US and who is supposed to be fluent in multiple languages. PS: She also doesn't know how to say the word "trivial.")

Everyone is mystified. Why now? Tweeters and skeeters used to joke that the Iran war was launched as a distraction from Epstein. Was Epstein now being used as a distraction from the Iran war?

That wouldn't be surprising, since the consensus is that Benedict Donald got seriously rolled by the Iranians after he threatened to blow them up. He TACOed, of course — but it's no laughing matter. Here's how Obama deputy national security adviser Ben Rhodes sums it up:

"In the best-case scenario, Trump struck a deal to reopen a Strait that was open before the pointless war he started, with the IRGC demonstrating its control over the Strait and potentially extracting fees plus sanctions relief. Thousands of innocents —including hundreds of children — dead in Lebanon and Iran for no reason. US troops killed and wounded. US embassies and bases in the Middle East badly damaged. US standing in the world obliterated. US munitions badly depleted.

"Hundreds of billions spent. Prices up everywhere. More global economic fallout to come. Putin strengthened and enriched. Just a catastrophic situation even in the best of circumstances. A profoundly shameful episode in American history no matter what happens next."

The other prevailing theory about Moose & Squirrel is that something is about to explode from the Epstein files, and she was trying to get ahead of it. People, some of them goofballs, speculated if Russia, Iran, or Israel were involved. But we cats have another theory.

Maybe it's Denmark. After all, Trump has started bleating about Greenland again. Wouldn't that be delicious? We cats PURR.

Leo Can't Go Home Again

By Hubie and Bertie

Here's where the first American pope will spend the Fourth of July: Lampedusa, the southernmost island off Sicily, and the historical entry point for African refugees into Italy. It's also known for its pristine beaches, delicious cuisine, and Sea Turtle Recovery Center. Sounds fabulous — but surely Leo will use his visit to stress the importance of welcoming the refugee (or, as Jesus put it, the stranger).

This is where he's going instead of accepting the Trumpsters' invitation to celebrate Independence Day in a broiling-hot Washington, DC filled with Hitlerian Trump monuments. Can you blame him? Especially after what apparently happened at the Pentagon this past January.

Reports abound that a Defense Department under-secretary named Elbridge Colby summoned Cardinal Christophe Pierre, who at the time was the Vatican's ambassador to the US, and told him, "America has the military power to do whatever it wants in the world. The Catholic Church had better take its side." Rumor has it the Avignon Papacy was pointedly mentioned. The Cardinal was, um, not pleased.

And, it seems, neither was Leo. Not only has the Vatican permanently shelved any possible trip to the US for him in 2026, it's broadly hinting that the Pope may never come here at all — at least, not as long as this Administration is in charge. That must be disappointing for Benedict Donald, who loves to cozy up to famous folks who have golden gewgaws in their homes. Proximity to such people gives him validation.

Interestingly, Leo hasn't backed off his criticism of the Trumpsters one bit, and in fact has doubled down. So whatever the goal of this silly January meeting was, it looks like it backfired big-time.

Sadly, Americans who were hoping to see Il Papa toss out the first pitch for the Chicago White Sox this summer are out of luck. But we hope Leo enjoys some scuba diving and fresh seafood and couscous on Lampedusa instead. He deserves it. We cats PURR.

Here's Another Statement We Liked Today

 

Jason Carter, Chairman of the Board of Trustees, The Carter Center

The Bat Man Speaks, Trump TACOs

By Miss Kubelik

Pope Leo may not have taken off after Benedict Donald with a baseball bat today, but when he spoke out against Trump's Iran threats, he might as well have. Leo knocked it out of the park, and as we all now know, Trump caved. Sadly, the farce will start all over again in two weeks.

This is why we try our damndest to limit our exposure to Donald Trump. He's simply not healthy for children and other living things.

We saw a lot of talk on the interwebs today about Congress. Leo himself actually suggested that Americans call their members and Senators to get them to do something. (Did the Capitol switchboard crash? You can only wonder.) We cats mostly lurked on the social platforms, but whenever we got the chance, we reminded tweeters and skeeters that Republicans are in charge of the House and Senate, not us. In Trump's first term, when we had control of the House, we impeached the motherfucker not once but twice. It was Republicans who refused to convict. Which would have prevented him running again.

Meanwhile, we're wondering if Trump's "civilization will die tonight" tweet will have any effect on today's special election in GA-14. The former Congresswoman from that district, Marjorie Taylor Greene, published an absolutely scathing anti-Trump, anti-Iran-war post yesterday. Will that have any effect on the margin? Shawn Harris won't win — but could he come close, and put another scare into the GOP? (Right now, Harris is only three percentage points behind with 40 percent of the vote in.) That would make us cats PURR.

(UPDATE, April 8: Looks like Republican Clay Fuller ended up beating Shawn Harris by 11 points. Less than two years ago, MTG won re-election by 30 points. We hope Harris is willing to run again in November — it'll be fun to make Republicans spend money in a district they should be able to completely take for granted. We cats PURR.)

"Not What They're Paid For"

 A contemplative Randy Rainbow turns in one of his best. We cats PURR.

Time For This Again

"It's really difficult to cover [Trump] in a way that conveys how unhinged he is. That's kind of how people are trained to do political journalism. It's like, OK, what did he say that was newsworthy, what's new? So you kind of pick up those things and convey them to your audience. But in reality, when you actually watch his rallies, you see that they're full of hatred, he's lying constantly, and a lot of it is incoherent.

"It's true that he talks to the press a lot. But he doesn't really convey meaningful information."

—Aaron Rupar, in The Times