via GIPHY
By Zamboni
We cats will not be watching the Olympics. If you're a faithful reader, you know we have a long, proud history of hating the games. You should hate them, too. Here's why:
1. The IOC is one of the most corrupt, evil organizations ever to walk the earth. They grease each other's palms, give dictators a platform on which to preen themselves, make cities jump through stupid hoops to host, bankrupt the ones that are chosen, and refuse to cancel games in the wake of murders and other outrages. They make the Republican Party look decent and honorable.
2. The Olympics are in Korea. They eat dogs there. Okay, we cats don't like dogs much, but that still grosses us out.
3. Russian athletes are being allowed to compete even though Russia is supposed to be banned from the games. See #1.
4. NBC is covering the games again, which means more insipid athlete profiles, commercials that pose as "news," and endless, endless jingoism. But at least, no Matt Lauer.
5. That doctor in Michigan who abused Olympic gymnasts — which everyone seemed to know but nobody did anything about. We cats HISS.
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