News flash: Republican Senator John Cornyn thinks the government should stop doing some stuff.
"It may be necessary to partially shut down the government in order to secure the long-term fiscal well-being of our country," he opined.
Sheesh. Republicans will make any lamebrain argument for strangling the government in the bathtub, won't they? Of course, we don't know why we should pay any attention to Cornyn in the first place, since he's a proven failure at jobs he's been given — but we've decided to have some fun with him anyway.
See, Cornyn didn't provide any specifics on what parts of the government should close up shop. So we cats suggest the following:
All military bases in the Lone Star state.
Patrols along the Texas-Mexico border.
The Agriculture Department office that handles price supports for Texas ranchers and farmers.
The National Weather Service division that monitors Texas tornadoes and hurricanes in the Gulf.
And finally, any department in FEMA that processes emergency payments to Texas disaster victims — especially after 67 House Republicans voted "no" on the Sandy relief bill today. We cats HISS.
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