Reading the story of Rudolph Norris, a low-level drug offender whose endless federal sentence was recently commuted by President Obama, we cats were struck by the contrast between the former inmate from Maryland and a certain convicted criminal who used to be the Republican Governor of Virginia.
Here's Norris — free after 22 years, grappling with the Internet and cellphones, and firmly resolved to get a decent job so he can start paying taxes — swearing that he's going to live up to the President's confidence in him. And here's "Transvaginal Bob" McDonnell, kicking and screaming and whining about being hauled off to a cushy federal hoosegow for a mere 24 months.
Never mind that we cats think McDonnell's abuse of Virginia women while he was in office makes him worthy of many more months behind bars. We think it's pathetic that after multiple unsuccessful, self-pitying appeals of his 11-count public-corruption conviction, he refuses to grow the eff up and take it on the chin.
After all, Rudolph Norris didn't languish in jail. He started researching case law in his prison library, trying to figure out how to get around his absurdly disproportionate sentence — aided, deliciously, by a fellow inmate who was in for insider trading. Ah-ha, we thought: Maybe Transvaginal Bob — a lawyer — can help someone like that when he goes to jail. (Note that we said "when.")
So suck it up, Transvaginal Bob. You're making yourself look like an ultra-weenie, when you should be taking a page from the ex-crack-seller who is determined to turn his life around. Because Rudolph Norris spent 10 times longer in jail than you ever will, and is 10 times the man that you'll ever be. We cats HISS.
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