Sunday, October 20, 2024

Tying One On


By Miss Kubelik

Perhaps a microphone going silent for almost 20 minutes is preferable to... um, whatever Benedict Donald said about Arnold Palmer yesterday in Latrobe, Pennsylvania. (On the other hand, it gave the Harris-Walz campaign another opportunity to be clever. And Stormy Daniels, as you'd imagine, was simply not to be outdone.)

We'll say no more, except to note that Palmer, like most professional golfers, was a big-time Republican.

Things just kept rolling today for Donald, who, still in Pennsylvania, toddled into a McDonald's and "worked" the fry station. "Worked" is in quotation marks because the restaurant was actually closed to the public for the duration of Trump's silly stunt. What's worse, his fry-cook apron did absolutely nothing for his figure (this will drive him crazy once he realizes it). Did his team not tell him he was going to have to wear that thing? The 1988 Michael Dukakis photo op that tanked immediately sprang to mind.

However, Trump is not the first Republican to try to fake his way through normalcy in an apron. Remember when Paul Ryan visited an Ohio soup kitchen in 2012? His advance team did such a lousy job that the meal was already over and the staff had tidied up. So Ryan was left washing clean pots in a spotless kitchen, and was rightly ridiculed for it.

At least the apron didn't make him look fat. Poor Donald! How simply frightful! How humiliating! How delightful! We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

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