Welcome The Stranger (And The Strange)

By Miss Kubelik

More than 260,000 Canadians have signed a petition to Parliament to send Donald Trump's US ambassador Pete Hoekstra back to the US, never to return. In the meantime, though, Canada is kinda stuck. Hoekstra is where he is, and sometimes you have to do what you have to do.

Meaning, invite the cretin to something you'd rather not have him anywhere near, like the 25th anniversary September 11 commemoration ceremony in Gander, Newfoundland. Ugh.

The town known worldwide for its graciousness, decency, and above-and-beyond friendliness on 9/11 will have its character tested by hosting someone who's completely ungracious, Trumpily indecent, and openly hostile. "The Town of Gander says its invitation to Hoekstra was protocol, not an endorsement," CTV reports. But internet wags have suggested a sequel to the hit musical "Come From Away," in which the residents of Gander throw Hoekstra's ass out.

We'll keep an eye on this story for you, because Benedict Donald will be sucking up all the oxygen in the American media's coverage of the anniversary. But less than a week out, we have to just say that Canadians are sick of Team Trump's insults — maybe madder about those than all the ridiculous tariffs in the world.

They're sick of the annexation "jokes," the lake renaming, the mocking of Canadian military cadets, and the "nasty" accusations. Prime Minister Mark Carney, with three recent Liberal by-election victories and his Parliamentary majority strengthened, made it clear: The Americans, he said have to "stop doing memes, stop throwing shade, stop trying to be tough, and start being serious," he said. We cats PURR.

De Adder Du Jour (1)

(IMAGE: Michael de Adder, deAdder.net)

Picking Fights With Canada Makes You A Loser

We don't often agree with Ontario Premier Doug Ford, but today's an exception. Translation: After he said that Trump was a bully who would "take your lunch money one day," he said that Trump would "take your toque off your head the next day." You're welcome. We cats PURR.

Canada Hates Us, And That's Not Good

By Miss Kubelik

It's pretty amazing how things have worked out politically in Canada since Benedict Donald manged to convince 77 million Americans to vote for him in 2024. (We're assuming that some buyers' remorse has set in since then... but to be honest, we're not sure.)

Even if it hasn't, sentiments north of our border have changed — and solidified. Sad to say that Canadians' view of the US has turned decidedly for the worse. They don't want to buy our booze, visit Florida, or cross into Michigan, Maine, or New York State to go shopping. And now, with this week's collapse in trade talks, Prime Minister Mark Carney has made it very clear how his countrymen feel about America under the sway of Benedict Donald and his hateful minions.

"We’ve recognized from the start that America has changed," Carney said today. "We recognize that sometimes, its signature is written in pencil. We cannot accept what they offered, and we will not give what they asked." Thank you, Prime Minister, for your bold words.

Since January 2025, we cats have not understood why Canada should be forced to deal with American assholes on trade, defense, or any other issues. Yep, times have been kinda tense before — Diefenbaker and JFK were not the best of friends, for example. But the relationship between our two countries has never been as strained as it is now.

Why should Canada have to negotiate with a jailbird and an Epstein pal? But maybe that's just us. We live for the day when President Ossoff can appoint somebody to the post in Ottawa who can repair relations. Whoever it is will have a lot of work to do. We cats HISS. 

Give Hoekstra The Hook

By Zamboni

Canadian disgust with Donald Trump is still going strong. While Ontario Premier Doug Ford has been hinting that he could restore US alcohol to his province's shelves under certain conditions — spoiler alert, Doug, Canadians still won't buy it — a new front has opened up on the "We Used to Like You but Now We Hate You" war.

More than 171,000 Canadians have signed a petition to toss Trump's odious US ambassador, Pete Hoekstra, from the country. This is a lot when you consider that an online petition only needs 500 signatures to be officially considered by the House of Commons.

Good on you, Canada! Hoekstra has been a particularly disturbing ambassador. Not only has he made careless and insulting comments about US-Canadian relations — supporting Benedict Donald's "51st state" nonsense, for example — he has ties to leaders in the Alberta separatist movement. Why should Canada tolerate a US ambassador who is possibly fomenting the dissolution of their country behind the scenes? The US wouldn't stand for it. Why should they?

Add to that the fact that Hoekstra is an asshole, and we wholeheartedly endorse this movement — even though it could put Prime Minister Mark Carney in a dicey spot. (We're confident that he could find a clever, Trump-frustrating way to handle it.) Meanwhile, we cats PURR.

Smoke Gets In Our Eyes

By Sniffles

Before we get into tonight's topic, let's just back up one second to observe that wildfires are burning not just in Ontario, but in Michigan, too. The problem is that it's kind of hard to tell Canadian wildfire smoke from American wildfire smoke. But Benedict Donald doesn't care.

"The United States is being unnecessarily invaded by filthy, polluted, and unhealthy air," Trump bleated (when he wasn't indulging in endless whines about the 2020 election — which means we now should mention that NBC, ABC, and CNN declined to air him last night).

Trump has latched on to the wildfires as another excuse to threaten tariffs against our Neighbor to the North. Canadians must be awfully tired of all this. After all, they're dealing with the smoke, too (see above). Let's just say that, if they're drowning their sorrows in their air-conditioned homes, they're not doing it with American spirits and wines — since Trump has given them absolutely no reason to abandon their boycotts of US goods.

Prime Minister Mark Carney, who's been running rings around Benedict Donald recently on trade matters, had a mild but firm response to Washington's bluster. "Climate change is the responsibility of everyone," he said, after drily noting that the US has reduced its investment in clean energy. "Truly everyone — including the United States."

Donald is looking awfully tired and limp these days. During his little-watched "election fraud" speech last night, he sounded raspy and unfocused, as if he'd spent an afternoon breathing in Ontario smoke. People have speculated that his lungs are filling with fluid from CHF. We have no idea, but we're less worried about Trump than about his true-believers who will try to enforce his fascism after he is gone.

It'll take a lot to recover from the damage of Trump 2.0, but it will all start this November. In the words of Joyce White Vance, "Your vote matters. Prepare to do whatever it takes this fall to cast it. Let’s put a stop to the lies once and for all." We cats PURR.

(PHOTO: Evan Buhler, Montreal Gazette)

Oy!

By Miss Kubelik

We cats don't make it there very often because it's so popular (and crowded), but we enjoy breakfast at Arthur's Nosh Bar in the historic St.-Henri neighborhood of Montréal. It's got great comfort food — the kind your bubbe would serve with love. But now Arthurs in the crosshairs of the Quebec language police.

If you look closely at the photo above, you'll see "Nosh Bar" stenciled on its window. Big no-no and a grave threat to the French language, apparently. This is a pain in the ass for the owners, who have been in business for 10 years and who have taken the trouble to trademark the name. They're trying to figure out a work-around.

There's no solving the idiocy of the current provincial government and the majority party, the Coalition Avenir du Quebec, but we have a possible solution for Arthurs. The French word for "nosh" (at least, according to our iPad translator, LOL) is "bouffe." If they just stencil in "Bouffe Bar" on the window below "Nosh Bar," they can maybe satisfy the gendarmes and enjoy some alliteration at the same time.

It's all so ridiculous. We look forward to the CAQ getting booted out of power in this fall's election. Meanwhile, we cats HISS.

Numbers Don't Lie (Les Chiffres Ne Mentent Pas)

 

By Baxter

New data reveal that the Canadian boycott of the United States is still going strong — stronger than previously estimated, in fact.

"While official Statistics Canada figures show a roughly 25 percent decline in Canadian residents returning from the US last year, cellphone data compiled by researchers at the University of Toronto's School of Cities found that the year-over-year drop in cross-border trips was closer to 42 percent," the CBC reports.

Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, and multiple locations in Florida like Miami and Orlando have been particularly hard hit, despite Canadians' famous tendency to escape south during the winter. And business travel has been affected just as much — all thanks to Benedict Donald, his stupid tariffs, and his ridiculous "51st state" BS.

This is costing the United States nearly $9 billion — so far. (Nice going, Trump.) But our American ambassador in Ottawa just can't understand it. He's particularly miffed about Canada's boycott of US booze.

"We think the alcohol ban is totally unfair," Pete Hoekstra said. "It's a clear indicator of how 11 provinces [and territories] feel about trade with the United States. They're sending a very, very clear message about how doing business with the United States doesn't appeal to them.

"The prime minister has reinforced that message. It creates some questions about whether Canada really wants to do business with the United States."

Wow, he's so close to getting it. What an idiot. We cats HISS.

Le Chandail De Hockey

By Miss Kubelik

The jury is out on the new Quebec premier, Christine Fréchette. Everybody hated her predecessor, but we're expecting Fréchette to still champion a separation referendum — even though a majority of Quebec voters are not interested. (Can't let Alberta have all the fun, right?)

But she sorta gets points for giving French President Emmanuel Macron a Canadiens hockey jersey today. (The name on the jersey is Canadien forward Alexandre Texier, a native of Grenoble, France).

She has to be happy that her gesture turned out not to be an empty one, since the Habs managed to eliminate the Buffalo Sabres in the Stanley Cup playoffs tonight. But we'd caution her on the fall referendum. Canada is feeling especially unified these days, and we can all thank Benedict Donald for it. Like the Republicans' efforts at gerrymandering, perhaps the Canadian separatists should be careful what they wish for — or at least come to realize that they've chosen the wrong time. We'll see. In the meantime, we cats PURR.

First Nations Should Come First

By Miss Kubelik

Quite a smackdown yesterday for the silly separatists in Alberta, Canada. A judge in Calgary squashed their petition for an independence referendum, saying that Alberta should have checked in with its Indigenous citizens and how they think secession would affect their treaty rights.

No surprise that the Maple MAGA white guys who want to leave Canada brushed the First Nations off. But how sad for them, since they swore they had collected well over the 178,000 signatures needed to force the referendum onto October's ballot. (They also managed to screw up by posting the private data of almost three million Albertans on the interwebs, and somebody may get hauled off the hoosegow over it.)

Moral of the story: You can't hold a referendum on whether to take something that isn't yours in the first place — like land covered by treaties that predate the creation of your province. The separatists' racism and sense of entitlement blinded them to this simple fact. We cats HISS and them and PURR at everything else.

Liberal Love-In

By Baxter

The Canadian Liberal Party is meeting this week in Montreal, and will wrap up tomorrow with an address by Prime Minister Mark Carney at 2 PM. No, we cats aren't there (yet), but we agree with former Prime Minister Justin Trudeau that for first-time convention attendees, to be able to meet in Montreal is something special.

A year ago, we cats would never have thought we'd write this, but the Liberals are riding high. They not only have historically positive approval ratings, they're also on the brink of a majority, thanks to a few by-elections that are scheduled for April 13. (Merci, Donald!)

Two elections are in reliably Liberal ridings, and the third is in Terrebonne, outside of Montreal, which the Liberals won last time by — literally — one vote. That result was tossed by the courts, and the re-vote is Monday. But because of the recent floor-crossings, Mark Carney doesn't need Terrebonne to get a majority.

Carney has been wily and smart, keeping his caucus together and wooing newcomers, inviting them to join his "big tent." This is all very impressive for an international banker who wasn't exactly known as a savvy politician before 2025. But as he is with the French language, Carney is a quick study. We cats admit it: We're star-struck.

Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre, meanwhile, is in a bad place. How many more defections can he survive before his party demands he resign? We're already seeing calls for him to step down, because his brand of "Maple MAGA" is just not playing well in Canada. And why should it? PP is incapable of surveying the landscape and pivoting to address the reality — all he knows are the talking points that Benedict Donald provides him, and they don't translate well. C'est comme ça que ça devrait être. We cats PURR.

Michael Rousseau, Gagnez Votre Salaire

By Miss Kubelik

We cats get very impatient with the Francophones in Quebec who keep fretting that French is under siege and they must language-police everything. But that said, the CEO of Air Canada is a jackass.

Michael Rousseau (yep, that's a French name) recorded a short video offering condolences after the fatal jet-versus-fire-truck accident at LaGuardia on Sunday night. Except for "bonjour" and "merci," it was English-only. Okay, that's extraordinarily bad.

Several reasons: 1) One of the pilots who died in the accident was a Quebecker from Coteau-du-Lac, outside of Montreal. 2) French is the official second language of Canada, and a quarter of Canadians speak it. 3) Rousseau promised back in 2022 that he was going to learn the language after a previous controversy in which he implied he was "too busy" to do it. Hey, dude, the Prime Minister of the entire country has found time to work on his French, so why can't you?

"I'm ​very disappointed — as others are, rightly so — in this unilingual message of the CEO of Air Canada," PM Mark Carney said. "It shows a lack of judgment, a lack of compassion."

Oui. If, after four years, Rousseau hasn't learned enough French to make a four-minute video — with a teleprompter, even! — after two of his pilots sacrificed themselves to save their passengers, he doesn't deserve to be in his job and make his (one presumes) enormous salary. Aside from everything else, it's PR 101. Nous, les chats, SIFFLONS.

Three Little Kittens Want These NATO Mittens

 

By Sniffles

Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney is in Norway observing NATO exercises and sending the message that no malign actor should think of messing with the Arctic. And he got this nifty pair of mittens. (We still need them — it's snowing picturesquely in Montreal right now.)

Back here in Canada, things are looking pretty rosy for Carney's party. The MP for Nunavut, Lori Idlout, crossed the floor from the NDP to join the Liberals, putting them one vote away from a majority in Parliament. Four MPs have changed parties since November, three of them Conservatives. All Carney needs to do now is win two of the three upcoming by-elections, and he'll have 172 seats. (It'll be a thin margin, but Carney will manage his caucus better than Mikey Johnson.)

Conservatives can whine all they want, but they never had a problem when Stephen Harper engineered high-profile floor crossings 20 years ago. It must be frustrating for them, though — Harper was a much stronger leader for them than the hapless and unappealing Pierre Poilievre, whom they picked to head the party even though polls show that a whole lot of Canadians loathe him.

It's the mirror image of where the Liberals are right now. In fact, the word that pollsters are using is "Carneymania." Wherever Justin Trudeau is, that's got to make him smile. We cats PURR.

De Adder Du Jour

 

By Sniffles

All you need to know about the Gordie Howe Bridge — aside from Mark Carney calling Benedict Donald to correct him on the basic facts — is that "Matty" Mouron, the owner of a competing bridge between Detroit and Ontario, met with Jeffrey Epstein pal (and Secretary of Commerce) Howard Lutnick to bitch about the Gordie Howe just hours before Benedict Donald came out against it.

Fun fact: Back in 2018, Trump thought the Gordie Howe Bridge was a swell idea. Surely PM Carney reminded him of that. (And that Canada has paid the entire bill for its construction.) Donald's hissy fit has boosted Canadian confidence and made life more difficult for Michigan Republicans whose names are on the ballot this year.

That's not just for economic reasons. Gordie Howe was Canadian, but he was also a Detroit Red Wings legend, racking up so many great stats and throwing so many elbows that he became known as "Mr. Hockey." Michiganders will not soon forget Trump's insult. We cats PURR.

(IMAGE: Michael de Adder, deadder.net)

Cool Hand Carney

By Zamboni

This is a super-duper speech.

We cats wish we had come up with the Heated Rivalry concept before anybody else did. But we didn't, so the laurels go to the true creators. No harm, no foul — let's all celebrate its success.

Meanwhile, we're happy to have Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney riding the wave the Crave series' popularity — something that the leader of the opposition couldn't do. Can you picture the ever-Trumpy Pierre Poilievre being comfortable with a show that celebrates gay love?

Nah, we can't, either. But the buttoned-up economist who's been to Davos 30 times? No problem. We cats PURR.

Canadians: Kristi Noem Wants To See Your Face

By Sniffles

As of Friday, Canadians crossing the border into the US must be photographed both entering and leaving. Wow. We cats remember when all you had to do was show a driver's license — or maybe just chat up the friendly customs agent. It was a lot more relaxed, because the US and Canada had the longest undefended border in the world.

We still do.

More rigid rules came into effect after the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001 — but there have been no such attacks since, and the only reason that Canadians are having to put up with this crap now is because Donald Trump and his minions are a bunch of dicks.

Plenty of Canadians on social media are complaining about this rule, and saying that it will only reinforce their decisions to avoid the US for vacations and other travel. Treating our closest ally like a suspicious character has a chilling effect — who knew? Visits by Canadians to the United States have dropped by nearly a quarter. It's not just that they loathe Benedict Donald. They don't want invasions into their privacy, or maybe even the possibility of being detained. Holy smokes!

It's a tribute to the power of our postwar and post-Cold War influence that Canadian goodwill remains at all — they're able to separate the Trump regime from their affection for the American idea. But how long will that last? It's just one of the many things we cats worry about going into 2026, and one of the zillion reasons we know we have to win the midterms. Let's get working, everyone. We cats PURR.

A Very Tory Holiday

By Sniffles

Polls in Canada show the Liberal and Conservative Parties nearly tied in approval — within the margin of error, which after a brutal beat-down over the past year, you'd think the Tories would find encouraging.

Alas for them, their leader is in terrible shape. Pierre Poilievre polls 25 points behind Prime Minister Mark Carney, 51 to 26 percent. And the Conservative Party's leadership review is next month — eek.

That's insult added to injury for PP after Ontario MP Michael Ma crossed the floor last week. In the past few days, Poilievre has had to suffer through some combative interviews with Canadian media about why he's losing members to the Liberals. He's responded with Trumpian defensiveness and accusations, as you might expect. Sad!

With more floor crossings possible, and Pundit World smelling blood in the water, nobody really knows what the Conservatives will do. Personally, we cats hope they hold on to PP. Every time he opens his mouth, he reminds Canadians how much they dislike him.

Barring some unforeseen external event — Russia invading Finland, Trump talking annexation again — Carney's lead over Poilievre shouldn't budge much between now and January. And Conservative MPs in swing districts will spend Christmas asking themselves if they want to tie their political future to a guy sitting at 26 percent. We cats PURR.

Top Of The World, Ma!

By Sniffles

Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney's Liberals are one seat away from a majority government tonight, thanks to Ontario MP Michael Ma crossing the floor (changing parties) from the Conservatives.

Liberals gave Ma a standing ovation at their Christmas party this evening. Fun factito: Ma went to the Conservatives' holiday bash last night, and posed for happy photos with Tory leader Pierre Poilievre.

That's positively gangsta. We cats PURR.

Tidbits And Cat Treats: A Deli-icious Week Edition

By Miss Kubelik

Well, everyone, we cats hope you will kick back for at least a few hours this weekend and enjoy the afterglow of the last few days. The chinks in MAGA's armor are becoming so pronounced that even pundits in Canada are saying it's reverberating for the Conservative Party up there. Is the end of Trumpism near? Only if we keep working. Our mission, should we decide to accept it, is to replicate Tuesday's wide winning margins in the midterms next year. So rest up and energize! Meanwhile, here are some additional news items that have gotten our attention:

DC Sandwich Guy was acquitted yesterday in a gloriously unanimous jury verdict. What an embarrassment for Judge Box o' Wine and the DOJ. And now the Democratic Party has a new star (or hero, as everyone's been saying). Since some of our longtime Democratic leaders are starting to head for the exits (see: Pelosi, Nancy, who has earned her rest and relaxation), perhaps DC Delegate Eleanor Holmes Norton, 88, should also retire and we should run Sandwich Guy in her place.

It's pretty neat that the Democratic candidate for Attorney General in Virginia was able to overcome a maddening double standard and not only survive his "violent texts scandal" but also win by a comfortable six points. Even better that the Republican member who leaked the texts lost her seat in the House of Delegates on Tuesday.

Senate Democrats have just proposed a reasonable solution to the government shutdown: Extend the ACA subsidies for a year, and use that time to hammer out longer-term healthcare fixes. The Republicans are poised to reject it. We don't know what they're thinking, and why they don't understand that 1) Americans blame them and Trump for the shutdown, and 2) the optics on everything they're doing are simply terrible. Perhaps some former Republican can explain it to us?

(Hmmm, maybe they have suddenly grasped at least some of the optics. Rumor has it that the Administration is seeking to comply with court orders and pay November SNAP benefits in full after all. The idea of empty plates at Thanksgiving may have been too much, even for the GOP. But we'll believe it when it happens.)

Republicans still have to deal with a lot of other bad optics, though — especially this one from yesterday, when someone at an Oval Office event fainted, and Trump just stood there like the sociopath he is:

This was after he fell asleep in his chair during the speeches, that is. Will reporters ever ask about his mental and physical state, or just continue to ignore what everyone can see? We cats HISS.

(UPDATE: Heedless of the optics after all, Team Trump went crying to SCOTUS yesterday about SNAP. Sadly for them, it landed with Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson, whose administrative stay, say observers, is probably the best way to get SNAP payments out the door fast.)

Floating On Air

By Zamboni

Democrats, it's been a rough year for us, and then some. If you're feeling good today — and you should — you deserve to. Be sure to enjoy it, because the midterms are next and we have work to do.

But first, a couple more thoughts about yesterday.

Preacher of the House Mike Johnson, who is making Kevin McCarthy look like an accomplished statesman these days, is trying to brush off the 2025 election as just "blue states and blue cities" voting blue.

Nice try, Mikey. Pennsylvania is a blue state? We thought it went for Benedict Donald last year. Georgia isn't red? Democrats ousted Republican PSC incumbents by double digits there. The famously "blue" Mississippi saw the GOP lose its supermajority in the state legislature. And every single county in Virginia — which elected a Republican governor in 2021 — shifted to the Democrats. Every. Single. County.

Meanwhile, up in Canada, Prime Minister Mark Carney's minority government is trying to get a budget deal done. If they can't, it's possible that Canadians could be looking at another snap election, which nobody wants — except maybe for Tory leader Pierre Poilievre (and we don't know why... to get his ass kicked again?). Members of the Conservative caucus may be seeing the writing on the wall: One MP from Nova Scotia crossed the floor (as they say) yesterday to caucus with the Liberals. He hinted there may be more to come. "I would suggest that there probably are those that are in the same boat," he said.

One down. Just two to go, and Carney's got a majority. We cats have our paws crossed, and we PURR.

(IMAGE: Detail from The Madhouse, by Kent Monkman)