Is DeSantis Splitting?

By Sniffles

Word came today that the stupid super PAC supporting Ron DeSantis, "Never Back Down," has, OMG, backed down. Or retreated. It's canceling its paid door-knocking efforts in the Super Tuesday states of Nevada, North Carolina, Texas and California. One can only assume that Rhonda will instead pour all of his dwindling efforts into Iowa and South Carolina. Not sure if it'll work out for him.

All this comes on the heels of restive rumors in DeSantis Funding World. Dude has had probably the worst rollout of any Presidential campaign, ever. And he hasn't managed to recover since. Reports of Team DeSantis begging major donors for $50 million before the first GOP debate in Milwaukee makes you wonder how the moneybags are feeling now. Rhonda didn't exactly shine on that stage.

Do these big contributors just not vet their candidates? Clearly they were seduced by tales of DeSantis's electoral prowess in Florida and how the Sunshine State is a logical springboard to national prominence. But did anyone dig around and realize that Rhonda is a shallow, untested, prickly, awkward, unintelligent, bot-like candidate? Or were they blinded by his 20-point margin in his 2022 re-election campaign?

Whatever — they've certainly wasted their money. We cats PURR.

Tidbits And Cat Treats: Ossified Mitch Edition

By Hubie and Bertie

So much news happening this week! In the old days, the lead-up to Labor Day weekend would be sleepy and getting sleepier — but not anymore. Here are some jaw-dropping developments that have captivated us (and, we assume, you) lately.

For the second time in two months, evil SCOTUS-packer Mitch McConnell seized up during a press avail. Clearly something neurological is going on. Can you imagine if this had happened to Joe Biden? You'd never hear the end of the Republican screaming. (McConnell, by the way, is slightly older than Biden, by about nine months.) So if Mitch calls it quits, can Kentucky's Democratic Governor, Andy Beshear, nominate GOP AG Daniel Cameron as his replacement? That would certainly clear the field for the next gubernatorial race, LOL.

Hurricane Idalia mostly missed Tallahassee today, but did manage to split a 100-year-old tree right down the middle, half of which fell on the Governor's mansion. With that, we'd say that Ron DeSantis's luck has officially run out.

Yesterday the White House hosted a special event to announce the first 10 drugs whose prices Medicare will negotiate with pharmaceutical companies: Eliquis, Jardiance, Xarelto, Januvia, Farxiga, Entresto, Enbrel, Imbruvica, Stelara and Flasp. Manufacturers raked in $3.4 billion in out-of-pocket costs for these drugs just last year alone. Well, kiss it all goodbye, Big Pharma. And let's not forget that the right to negotiate was made possible by the Biden-Harris Inflation Reduction Act — which no Republican voted for. (They'll try to take credit for it anyway.)

The biggest news today was probably the decision in defamation case of Ruby Freeman, et. al. v. Rudolph V. Giuliani. Fittingly, the judge ruled in the plaintiffs' favor. It's unclear how Rudy will be able to pay the damages, and even more fuzzy whether he'll comply with the discovery order. (He's clearly hiding something that he thinks will hurt him in his criminal cases.) But how will that $100,000-a-head Rudy fundraiser in Bedminster go on September 7? It's supposed to include a "round table" discussion with Giuliani and Benedict Donald! Can't believe their lawyers are going to be happy about that.

Finally, our New York Attorney General, Letitia James, has averred in a court filing today that Trump fraudulently inflated his net worth by $2.2 billion every year between 2011 and 2021. Wow! James is set to take Trump and his spawn to trial on October 2. Isn't it great that so many of Benedict Donald's adversaries are Black? Tish James, Judge Tanya Chutkan, Manhattan DA Alvin Bragg, and the goddess of them all, Fulton County's own Fani Willis. We cats applaud them, and we PURR.

Rest Assured, Biden Remembers This

As Hurricane Idalia bears down on Florida, just a reminder that one of the first votes Ron DeSantis cast as a freshman member of Congress in 2013 was against relief for Hurricane Sandy. In fact, he voted against it twice: a $9.7 billion bill and a $50 billion bill. We cats HISS.

Kiss Of Death

By Miss Kubelik

We cats hadn't happened upon the infamous kiss that Luis Rubiales, the head of Spain's football federation, planted on star player Jenni Hermoso — just some still photos of the two of them hugging after the Spanish team won the Women's World Cup. But when we finally did see it (above), it was clear that it was a non-consensual power grab.

How do we know? Because Rubiales grabbed Hermoso by the head when he kissed her. That wasn't affection, celebration, or excitement — that was an act of domination.

Just like what Michael Corleone did to his turncoat brother Fredo in The Godfather, Part II. You get kissed like that, you know you're toast. Or at least who's boss.

Rubiales is an arrogant pig who deserves everything bad that's coming his way. We cats HISS.

"What Are We Doing Here?"

 

"We could be at Pizza Ranch in Iowa! Instead, we have to sit here in Jacksonville and pretend to care about three murdered Black people."

Bob Crosses The Rainbow Bridge

"Mr. Barker was widely known for his longstanding dedication to the cause of animal rights. He quit as master of ceremonies for both the Miss USA and the Miss Universe pageants in 1988 because they gave fur coats as prizes. He also protested the mistreatment of animals by their trainers on the sets of various movies and television shows. He ended every installment of The Price Is Right by saying, 'Help control the pet population. Have your pet spayed or neutered.'" (The New York Times)

Even Better

 

Inmate No. 1135809

By Zamboni

Last night, a fake Donald Trump mug shot started circulating online before the Fulton County Sheriff's Office released the real thing (above). The fake one was much more benign. If the Trumpsters were smart, they would try to monetize that one instead.

Trump apparently thought that glowering would be Churchillian. But he just looks evil. Like a guy who would rape somebody in a department store dressing room. We cats HISS.

Bad News For Trumpsters

The alleged billionaire whom the MAGAts adore doesn't have $200,000, does he? We cats PURR.

The Lightness Of The Dark

By Baxter

Team Biden-Harris does a lot of things right, and one of them is embracing the whole "Brandon" meme — even though, yes, it's silly. (If you have to explain the back story, it's too much of a reach.)

But never mind — it's clearly gotten under Republicans' skins. Did you see how miffed they were when Joe posed with a Dark Brandon coffee mug? Trump's legal team even put it in a court filing!

Now, these images are going up on billboards in Milwaukee, just in time for the GOP debate there tonight, and will be included in a digital ad on FoxNews.com. Well done! Joe's not only trolling the Republican candidates on Brandon, but he's reminding them of their biggest political weakness, the loss of Roe — for which voters have been punishing them again and again.

Back in the day, a political scientist from Duke University posited that you could predict a POTUS's performance based on the President's character. One element of the formula was whether the President enjoyed, well, being President. (FDR did, Nixon didn't.) Pretty safe to say that Joe Biden loves his job. That might drive the Trumpsters and Republicans more crazy than anything else. We cats PURR.

Fani The Fearless

By Sniffles

Mark Meadows thought he should be given extra time to show up for his Georgia arraignment because he's been trying to walk his RICO case to a more friendly jurisdiction. After all, he no doubt mused, why bother to show up at the Fulton County jail on Friday if he succeeds in getting everything moved to federal court?

So via his lawyer, he asked DA Fani Willis for a huge favor: "Please, ma'am, delay my booking until I finish my judge- and jury-shopping."

Um, no. Here is a classic case of privileged white maleness coming up against implacable female, enforce-the-laws-equally Blackness. And losing. "Get your ass down to Atlanta like I told you, or get fitted for a comfy orange jumpsuit, mofo."

It would be shocking if Meadows, who is a total cretin, didn't choose to fight her tooth and nail right up to noon on Friday. And nobody knows whether he'll prevail in any of it. But in the meantime, how satisfying is it to see Willis speaking to these Trumpster traitors as no one has spoken to them before? We cats love it, and we PURR.

Randy's Singin' In The Arraign

Good thing Benedict Donald has those silly personalized umbrellas of his, because it's definitely arraigning. We cats PURR.

A Little Slice Of Heaven

 

For a number of reasons, we're pondering eternity these days. This works for us. We cats PURR.

Republicans' Week From Hell

 

It's always risky to accept anything Benedict Donald says as even remotely true. But it seems logical that he'll follow through with this.

What better way for Trump to spend his time this week than by 1) disrupting the GOP Presidential debate via Tucker Carlson on Wednesday, and then 2) stepping on any Thursday bounce a candidate might receive from a good performance?

But don't expect anyone to shine in Milwaukee. The "debate," with or without Trump, will be a silly clown-car event to begin with. And, if you accept this interpretation of the Fourteenth Amendment to the Constitution, completely pointless. We cats PURR.

Storm Warnings

By Hubie and Bertie

We cats have never been to Palm Springs, California, but is this sky bad? It looks bad.

Right now, as our paws type this, Tropical Storm Hilary is pounding Southern California, which has also just had an earthquake. Plus tornadoes. So, yeah, it's pretty bad.

Still, Californians might not have as nasty a week as the 19 co-defendants in Fulton County, Georgia. They must surrender as of this Friday — so everyone has to figure out on which day and at what time they will present themselves at the Fulton County Jail. Doubtless many of them will show up in the dead of night to avoid the press (the jail is open 24/7). But what will Benedict Donald do?

He's already agreed to an online interview with Tucker Carlson to compete with the silly GOP debate on Wednesday. But it's tempting to guess that he'll either turn himself in just as the debate gets underway, or leave everyone guessing until the last minute (to drive up ratings). As the world knows, he has no shame. But this Georgia thing isn't a game — it's got folks thinking that at some point, he could actually be a flight risk. Should be fun to watch. We cats PURR.

Happy Birthday To You, 42

By Miss Kubelik

Yep, Bill Clinton is 77 today. GASP! As we all watch the Republican Party descend into self-immolation — what with Benedict Donald tying them up in knots and the rest of the clown car trying to decide how to have their upcoming debate without him — it's fun to look back on forever-young Bill's two terms and everything he accomplished.

Top of that list is his ability to drive the GOP up the wall. You go, Bill! He certainly inspired the naked hate that defines what's left of the Republican Party today.

But it's not really new, is it? Republicans have been mean about us since at least 1976, when Bob Dole spent the Vice Presidential debate against Walter Mondale muttering darkly about "Democrat wars." But they really kicked into overdrive after Bill beat a GOP incumbent in 1992. (Goodness, it's like they believed they deserved to govern, no matter what the voters thought.) And now, post-Trump, the Clinton impeachment looks even sillier.

We hope that Bill (and Hillary) enjoyed many happy returns of the day. They're having a pleasant retirement, while the GOP's leading guy is staring at at least four (maybe more) indictments, and their party is held captive by nutcases. As we've often said, we'd rather be Us than Them. We cats PURR.

Pathetic

This makes us glad we no longer live in Virginia. Is the entire Republican Party run by 13-year-old boys? Because that's what it feels like.

Is this all they've got? We're going to win 2024 in a walk. We cats PURR.

On The Edge Of Disaster

By Zamboni

Everyone in Yellowknife, the capital of the Northwest Territories, has been ordered to evacuate by noon tomorrow. That's 20,000 people — half the population of the territories.

That's because there are 236 wildfires currently burning in the NWT, and one fire could reach Yellowknife this weekend if it doesn't rain soon. Most evacuees are leaving by car on the one highway in and out of the city. Commercial airliners and the Royal Canadian Air Force are flying others out to Calgary. The few who are sheltering in place are cutting down trees around their homes to create fire breaks. Meanwhile, the right-wing leader of the Canadian Conservative Party, Pierre Poilievre, decided to make a speech at a PEI gas station yesterday.

If you've been as appalled by the stories out of Maui these last few days, you're probably tempted to say that at least Yellowknife got enough warning to get out. True. But can the entire world talk about climate change now? Fires everywhere, record heat on land and in the seas, and now four tropical systems marching across the southern Atlantic. What's it going to take, Conservatives and Republicans? We cats HISS.

P.S. Despite the many fire emergencies, Meta is still blocking Canadian news, so NWT evacuees and their loved ones can't communicate on the Face Thing. In case you thought Elon Musk was the worst social media billionaire, guess again. We cats HISS and dump our dirty litter box on Mark Zuckerberg's head.

Ron's Ripoff

By Baxter

Ron DeSantis has spent $13 million of Florida taxpayers' money in his hapless run for the GOP Presidential nomination. We cats don't even live in Florida any more, but this makes us want to hack up a hairball.

Note to the media — When a major party candidate for Florida Governor (say, Charlie Crist) asks his opponent in a debate to pledge he won't immediately turn around and run for higher office, you ought to pay attention. Particularly when the opponent refuses to answer.

Note to Charlie — When the opponent stays mum, the obvious follow-up question is this: "Since you have no trouble raising millions for your Presidential campaign, will you reimburse Florida 100 percent of the costs associated with the campaign you refused to admit you'd run?"

One more note to the media — Your next question to every Republican in the state legislature should be this: "What are you going to do about this $13 million bilking of Florida taxpayers?" We cats HISS.

Georgia On Everybody's Mind

By Sniffles

We cats didn't stay up for the big Georgia indictment reveal at midnight last night (we sleep 18 hours a day, you know), but we did happen to catch Judge Robert McBurney's reaction when the sealed documents were returned to him at about 9 pm.

Yeah, "Whoa!" indeed.

Nineteen co-defendants is a lot of people to keep track of. One glance at the list reveals a lot of non-household names, but quick research shows that a lot of them are false electors, or Coffee County vote-machine tamperers, or (the worst of the lot) assholes who terrorized elections workers Ruby Freeman and Shaye Moss. Of particular note was the inclusion of Mark Meadows, who everyone thought had flipped, and the exclusion of Lady Lindsey Graham, which disappointed a lot of the tweeps we follow.

It was also satisfying to see charges for the ever-obnoxious Bible banger Jenna Ellis, who today has tweeted that she's turning her case over to the Lord. Is He licensed to practice law in Georgia? (And she'll need Him, because Trump's PAC won't pay a nickel for her defense, LOL.)

Last but not least, aside from Benedict Donald himself — who now has an iron grip on the formerly-held-by-George-W.-Bush moniker Worst Person Who's Ever Lived — has anyone fallen farther than Rudy Giuliani? Remember when he was TIME's Person of the Year after 9/11? Now he's charged under the very RICO laws he famously used as a prosecutor.

Trump now faces 91 felony counts across his four indictments in New York, Washington, Miami and Atlanta. Nobody knows how he's going to keep his silly 2024 campaign going as all these trials unfold, but one thing is clear: He's not being prosecuted while he's running for President. He's running for President while he's being prosecuted. There's a difference. We cats PURR.

Foreshadowing?

We've seen this photo before, but it was only just now that we noticed: Barack and Joe are sitting on white folding chairs. We cats PURR.

Ivana, Overgrown

 

It's hard to imagine where Benedict Donald could possibly be buried, since MAGA pilgrims would heap his grave with teddy bears, balloons, red hats and flags, and the rest of us would vandalize it (like his Hollywood star.) He'll probably have to be cremated and tossed somewhere, or (our preference) shot into space. 

 

Meanwhile, you have to wonder how his kids are okay with the neglect of their mom's tacky resting place on Trump's New Jersey golf course. What a terrible family. We cats HISS.

Signs Of Hope

By Hubie and Bertie

One of the things we like best about Benedict Donald's many indictments is the role that Black people are playing in holding him to account. Manhattan DA Alvin Bragg and New York Attorney General Letitia James are only two. Add Judge Tanya Chutkan in the January 6 case and, soon, Fulton County, Georgia, DA Fani Willis to the list. (Willis is expected to bring charges about election interference this week.)

Ain't America great? It's easy to get discouraged about the state of things these days, but just think about this: People of color are playing significant roles in thwarting the Trumpsters' war on our country. That says something really great about our fragile, inadequate-but-always-striving-to-be-better democracy. We cats PURR.

Ohio Does It Again

By Miss Kubelik

It's been a history-making week for the forces of oppression in the Buckeye State. But not in the way they hoped.

First came Tuesday's crushing vote on Issue 1 — Republicans' attempt to block an expected pro-choice constitutional amendment by raising the threshold for amendments to pass. Droves of voters resoundingly rejected it — even in areas that enthusiastically supported Benedict Donald in 2020.

And now, the anti-choicers' last hope to stop the amendment has also been squashed by the state supreme court (four Republicans, three Democrats).

Interestingly, the legal challenge to the pro-choice amendment was filed just days after abortion rights organizers presented about a billion more signatures than necessary to get the question on the ballot. Did the right wingers file the lawsuit as extra insurance because they secretly knew they were going to lose on Tuesday? (Nah. These zealots are too convinced of the righteousness of their cause to ever consider defeat.)

All of which means that bodily autonomy is about to be enshrined in the Buckeye State's constitution. Of course, that's assuming that our side can keep the momentum going and get our voters to the polls. But with the broad swath of people who humiliated the "Yes" folks on Tuesday, including 90-plus percent of Gen Z Ohioans, we're feeling quite optimistic. We cats PURR.

Tidbits And Cat Treats: Battle of Montgomery Edition

By Zamboni

News is breaking thick and fast, and we cats are here for it. It's only Wednesday, but take a gander at this week's excellent stories:

Yesterday's pro-choice vote in Ohio was indescribably delicious. It's impressive that so many people turned out on an August Tuesday in an off-year because they grasped what, in the end, was a fairly complicated situation. Think about it: Voters had to understand exactly what the Republicans were trying to do to the constitutional amendment process, how it linked to abortion, why it mattered, that voting "no" was good, and that they should get out and stand in line, maybe for a while, to cast their ballots on a hot summer day. 

Best of all, despite Ohio's lopsided result, the crazy right-wing nutjobs will take no lessons from it. In fact, expect them to demand that all the 2024 GOP candidates double down. Watch for a call for a national ban, since even red states can't be trusted to save the babies — which will continue to doom them at the polls. The loss of Roe is infuriating and distressing because women are dying. But it's been a, pun intended, supreme political gift. Keep the momentum going!

Moving a little south, it appears that DA Fani Willis in Fulton County, Georgia, is preparing to ask a grand jury to indict at least a dozen people next week. (Just like the big-mouth foreperson predicted in February, right?) Oh, gosh — please, please make two of them Lady Lindsey and Rootie Giuliani. In addition to Trump, of course.

Finally, Black Twitter continues to revel in Saturday night's riverfront brawl in Montgomery, Alabama, and it's fabulous. Tweeps keep cranking out video narrations, re-enactments and memes, one funnier than the next. Rosa Parks, Aquaman, and hats thrown in the air Mary Tyler Moore-style all figure prominently. And, of course, folding chairs.

Now that we've seen the crucial three minutes of the recorded fight, it's clear that the whole thing was kicked off by some drunken white privilege, and could have been a real tragedy if brothers, sisters, aunts and uncles hadn't rushed to rescue a Black man from — if not death — a real Rodney King beating. We don't even feel bad about the white woman who got hit over the head with that chair. As Black Twitter has eloquently observed, "Those white men and women tried to enforce a centuries-long racial hierarchy through violence, but Black folks said hell no." We cats wish them joy, and we PURR.

Proud Boys: Trying Crap In A Small Town

By Baxter

The results of today's election in Ohio are coming in, and with nearly a quarter of the votes counted, the "No" side is leading 70-30. Wow! Republicans may not be able to thwart the will of the people after all.

Meanwhile, here's a story that happened a little closer to home.

On Saturday, about 30 members of the seditious white supremacist group the Proud Boys marched in downtown Saratoga Springs, New York. They also held brief marches in the nearby towns of Waterford and Ballston Spa. The rallies were unexpected, but, at least in Saratoga, they weren't required to get a city permit. Still, they blocked traffic, parked illegally, and intimidated local business owners.

Why were they here? What were they trying to do? It's unclear. But it's racing season, and Saturday was a big day (something called the Whitney Stakes), so maybe they were just trying to get some attention. If so, they pretty much succeeded. We cats HISS.

Picking On Pence

By Sniffles

Mike Pence knows his career in the Republican Party is over, right? It's been teetering ever since January 6, 2021, when the Trumpsters who stormed the Capitol wanted to hang him — inspired in part by that infamous Benedict Donald tweet at 2:24 pm: "Mike Pence didn’t have the courage to do what should have been done to protect our Country and our Constitution, etc., etc., blah blah blah."

Now that Pence has been forced to answer a DOJ subpoena — as opposed to the House January 6 committee, which he cavalierly blew off — and now that he's so obviously given the Jack Smith grand jury a ton of indictable detail on Trump's campaign to end democracy, you can't help but wonder why Pence is even running for President to begin with. The devoted MAGAts will never forgive him.

Meanwhile, Trump's lawyer claimed today that Trump had merely been asking Pence to do stuff in an "aspirational" way. (Mmmm, hmmm. See one of our favorite tweep's clever translation, above.) If that's all they've got, it's pretty weak. But the other stuff Trump has been posting on his silly social media platform has been more direct.

"WOW, it’s finally happened! Liddle’ Mike Pence, a man who was about to be ousted as Governor of Indiana until I came along and made him VP, has gone to the Dark Side...He’s delusional, and now he wants to show he’s a tough guy."

Thanks to posts like this, Pence has been confronted by protesters multiple times, most recently outside a town hall event, where they jeered him with "That's a traitor!" and "You're a sellout!" That's been it so far, but it's entirely possible that one of these Donald devotees — and Second Amendment lovers — will forgo the hanging idea and move to employ deadlier force. Head's up, Mikey: With your Secret Service protection expired, you may want to think hard about the motives of the running mate you called "this good man." We cats HISS.

He's Just Mad The Judge Didn't Call Him "Mr. President"

 

"It was also very sad driving through Washington, DC, and seeing the filth and the decay and all of the broken buildings and walls and the graffiti." —Donald Trump, lying as usual

Born August 4, 1961, Honolulu, Hawaii

By Hubie and Bertie

Donald Trump has been lying all his life — on just about every subject under the sun. And as we all know, he kept doing it in the White House. The Washington Post counted his lies and came up with more than 30,000 of them (about 21 a day). He lies like he breathes.

But one of his most famous lies started up years ago, when he first began to claim that Barack Obama had not been born in the US. Trump gave the "birther" theory so much oxygen that in 2011, President Obama released his long-form birth certificate in response. That same year, Obama mocked Trump, who was in the audience, at the White House Correspondents' Dinner. (The story kind of got lost in the next day's announcement that the US had killed Osama bin Laden.)

Since Trump's fluky ascendance to the Presidency himself, people have suggested that being so publicly humiliated by a Black man at the 2011 WHCD was what finally drove him to run. Who knows? Getting a definitive answer would be tough, since Trump always lies.

Well, tomorrow, the President whose citizenship Trump questioned will turn 62. He's building his library and foundation and enjoying his status as a well-loved former POTUS, best-selling author, Nobel laureate, and respected world leader.

And what was Benedict Donald doing today? Getting arrested and arraigned in federal court for The Big Lie (and for conspiracy against the United States). It was satisfying and fun — until you think about all the damage Trump has done to the country. We cats HISS.

Can't Dive For The Remote Fast Enough

By Miss Kubelik

We cats decided to allow Rachel Maddow brief us last night on the key points of Benedict Donald's January 6 indictments. We figured it would be helpful before we read the actual document.

We lasted a little shy of 32 minutes. When Chris Hayes started bashing Dark Merrick, we shut the TV off. (Because CNN is no alternative.)

As one Republican put it in The Atlantic, "The indictment handed down today challenges every American to put a shoulder to the wheel and defend our Republic in every peaceful, legal and civilized way" possible.

In short, this is existential. So we will brook no silly criticism of someone who is steadfast on the side of democracy — particularly when he's the head of the Department of Justice, which necessarily operates opaquely to protect the rights of defendants. Any airhead pundit who sits there and pontificates like he knows what's going on at DOJ is full of soiled kitty litter.

MSNBC has become insufferable for us — particularly Hayes, the ever-repetitious Rachel, and (GACK!) Andrea Mitchell. They make us hack up endless hairballs. We'll stay temporarily tuned in to hear Lawrence O'Donnell, Joyce Vance, Barb McQuade, George Conway and John Heilemann. But if they're not there, our screen stays dark. We cats HISS.