Wir Sagen STFU, Baby Marco

By Hubie and Bertie

Of all the craven Trumpsters who have turned coat and gone over to the dark side — and yes, we're including Elise "Elsie" Stefanik in this group — the most reprehensible may be Baby Marco Rubio. Was T.S. Eliot thinking of him when he wrote "We are hollow men"? Baby Marco has sold what little soul he ever had to Benedict Donald, and the effects, as we've all seen, are aging him in real time.

Politicos and pundits are said to be doubly shocked, because they once considered Rubio to have character and principles. We cats are happy to say that we never once thought that he did. We'd love to say "We told you so" now that Marco — whose family fled either Batista or Fidel (both dictators, so take your pick) — has turned on his fellow immigrants and now supports shipping them off to third-country prisons. Despicable. Revolting. Turn-your-back-on-him-if-you-meet-him-in-public-level stuff.

However, on the good news side, Baby Marco got the smackdown of his life today — from none other than the German government.

What set Marco off was the German domestic intelligence agency's designation of the far-right Alternative for Germany, or AfD, as a bunch of extremists. Which they are. But Rubio is just beside himself to think that this means Elon Musk's favorite political party in Deutschland might be subjected to increased governmental surveillance. (You know, like we Americans were doing to terrorist groups after 9/11.)

"Germany just gave its spy agency new powers to surveil the opposition," Rubio bleated on social media. "That's not democracy — it's tyranny in disguise." Hah! He — or his State Department minions — must have felt really good when they hit the "publish" button on that one.

But the German Foreign Office wasted no time in posting back:

"This is democracy," they said, for all the world to see. "The decision is the result of a thorough and independent investigation to protect our constitution and the rule of law. It is independent courts that will have the final say. We have learned from our history that right-wing extremism needs to be stopped."

Wow. We have learned from our history that right-wing extremism needs to be stopped. It's a new world, Marco — one in which you're getting embarrassing lessons from the Germans — and wilkommen, bienvenue, welcome to it. We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.