Panning The Gold

By Miss Kubelik

Around 10 years ago or so, we cats received an email from a woman we'd done business with in the Cleveland area. The email repeated a story about Senator Hillary Clinton (D-NY) refusing to meet with Gold Star Mothers at her Capitol Hill office. In her email subject line, the woman labeled it "interesting" — and clearly stated in follow-up messages that Clinton was an un-American bitch who would never defend our men and women in uniform.

Being Hillary fans, and appalled that the woman who sent the email would mix business and politics, we responded with a huge cat fight — swearing to never patronize her company again. And we haven't.

Naturally, it turned out that the report that Senator Clinton had snubbed the Gold Star Mothers was a complete lie. We printed the documentation and snail-mailed it to the woman anonymously — hoping that maybe, possibly, she had learned a lesson. (But maybe not. She was, after all, a Teabagger 1.0.)

Tonight, we're thinking about that woman, and wondering how she feels about her political party's nominee.

Our Presidential candidate — one Hillary Rodham Clinton, in fact — has never dissed American parents who have lost children in war. The Republicans, on the other hand, have nominated an insane pathological liar who is currently insulting a dignified Gold Star couple whose Muslim American son sacrificed his life to save his unit in Iraq in 2004.

So, Ms. Whatever-Your-Name-Was at this small business in Lyndhurst, Ohio: Are you feeling good about Donald Trump today? We cats would like to know. And we HISS.

More Than A Cat Fight

By Zamboni

The combat that's escalating between two American Gold Star parents and the repulsive, spoiled, ignorant sociopath known as the Republican nominee for President is reaching new heights. We cats can just imagine how much the GOP establishment now wants to kill Donald Drumpf — unless they kill themselves first.

It all makes us flash back on The Worst Person Who's Ever Lived — the appointed-by-the-Supreme-Court President who sent Captain Humayan Khan to Iraq in the first place.

Ya know what? Even if you ascribe the most positive, the most charitable, and the most benign motivations to the Worst Person's efforts to embrace Muslim Americans after 9/11, the impact that George W. Bush was able to have in promoting tolerance in the months after the World Trade Towers fell pale in comparison to what Khizr Khan has been able to accomplish in less than a week.

The irony is striking. And when you remember that the Khans originally hail from a country whose president George W. Bush could not name back in the 2000 campaign... well, that's why we call Bush the Worst Person Who's Ever Lived.

And why is he being silent? We cats HISS.

What Little Donnie Will Do

By Baxter

We cats have long had a theory that Donald Drumpf will never make it to the debate stage this fall. Because he knows that Hillary Clinton will clean his clock.

Really! Not only does Drumpf have no knowledge of national and world affairs, no idea what's in the Constitution (see "Khan, Khizr") and no understanding of government and policymaking, he also rarely directly answers a question — Maureen Dowd's latest column being the most recent example.

And he'll be facing one of the most intelligent, experienced and prepared candidates ever to run for the nation's highest office. Perhaps the most (see "Not me, not Bill," under "Obama, Barack").

So — yeah, we think Trump is scared. He may accuse Michael Bloomberg of lacking guts, but in psychology, that's called projection. (And wow, the Democratic National Convention really seems to have needled him. Have you noticed how, ever since it ended, he's been proving everything we said about him to be right?)

Debates this fall? We're thinking not. Trump will try to weasel out of them, by saying that he doesn't like the moderator, or the format, or the set, or the locations — or the schedule. That's right, folks: It's already happening. We cats promise to keep an eye on this. In the meantime, we HISS.

Here's Some "White Power" We Can Get Behind

By Sniffles

We cats have such smart friends. One emailed us today to remind us that Hillary Clinton's acceptance-speech pantsuit evoked "Suffragette White" — and she was exactly right.

This same friend plans to wear white every Tuesday between now and Election Day. What a fabulous way to say "I'm With Her!" We cats PURR.

Humayan On Our Minds

By Miss Kubelik

Thank God it's Friday, as they say. This is the day that a certain road close to where we live is totally jammed — because a mosque is there, and traffic backs up, big time, as Virginia families get directed by county police into the Islamic center's vast parking lot. We cats usually try to avoid driving in that area on days like today, because it invariably adds an extra 10 minutes to our trip.

This is our long-winded way of saying that we have a lot of Muslim-American neighbors in this bellwether Virginia county. Which is just fine with us.

We've been thinking about all those folks in their suburban SUVs who were trying to get into the mosque for Friday prayers today. What were they talking about as they patiently waited for Prince William County's finest to direct them into the car park? Were they, perhaps, discussing the extraordinary appearance last night at the Democratic National Convention by Khizr Kahn, the father of a Muslim-American soldier who was killed in Iraq in 2004?

We can't imagine that they weren't. Goodness gracious, it was probably the dominant issue not just in people's cars but during the Friday services themselves. And did their imam encourage them to register to vote, so that the repulsive hater Donald Drumpf could be humiliated in November? (Interestingly, it appears that online searches for voter registration information shot up during Mr. Khan's amazing "Donald Trump, have you read the US Constitution?" speech.)

We cats urge our new hero, Khizr Khan, to travel his home-state Commonwealth of Virginia — and other states, like Michigan — and urge his fellow Muslim-Americans to register to vote and turn out to defeat the hatred, ignorance and bigotry of Donald Trump. And we send our sincerest condolences to Mr. Khan and his wife, Ghazala, for their loss. What a contrast between them and Patricia Smith at the Republican National Convention, no? We cats PURR.

What They Said

By Zamboni

Everyone's talking this morning about how the Democrats have appropriated Ronald Reagan's sunny optimism and shining cities on hills — while the Republicans have sunk into dystopia and despair. Yes, it was pretty terrific to hear so many of our DNC speakers this week shout "America is already great!" But in addition to that welcome refrain, we heard a lot of other important words. Here are just a few.

From Khizr Khan, the father of a US soldier who fell fighting in Iraq, who shamed Donald Drumpf with this withering question: "Have you even read the United States Constitution? I will gladly lend you my copy."

From Bush White House veteran Doug Elmets, speaking directly to his fellow Republicans: "If you believe, like I do, that loyalty to our country is more important than loyalty to party...I ask that you join me in voting for Hillary Clinton for President of the United States."

From Jacqueline Kennedy, America's most heroic First Lady, who made a posthumous appearance in Secretary Clinton's acceptance speech, warning against wars begun by "little men moved by fear and pride."

From Barack Obama, who has thrilled us in so many ways over the years, but who truly had us on the floor with "Not me, not Bill." (We also think it's incredibly important that he used the term "homegrown demagogue.")

From Joe Biden, who said, "We are America, second to none, and we own the finish line."

From Tim Kaine, whose Marine son is serving in Europe, and who declared, "I trust Hillary Clinton with our son's life."

From General John Allen, who said, "With [Hillary Clinton] as our commander-in-chief, our international relations will not be reduced to a business transaction."

From Reverend William Barber, chair of the North Carolina NAACP, who stopped the show with "When religion is used to camouflage meanness, we know that we have a heart problem in America. We are called on to be the moral defibrillators of our time.”

Read more here: http://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/state-politics/article92502997.html#storylink=cpy

From Michelle Obama, who reminded us all who was the grownup in this race: "When [Hillary] didn’t win eight years ago, she didn’t get angry or disillusioned. Hillary did not pack up and go home, because as a true public servant Hillary knows that this is so much bigger than her own desires and disappointments." (Oh, and we really loved the part about the White House being built by slaves — because it was.)

From Sarah Silverman, whose watchword was "unity" and who pointed out the obvious.

And finally, from HRC herself, who said:

"It’s true. I sweat the details of policy — whether we’re talking about the exact level of lead in the drinking water in Flint, Michigan, the number of mental health facilities in Iowa, or the cost of your prescription drugs. Because it’s not just a detail if it’s your kid — if it’s your family. It’s a big deal. And it should be a big deal to your President."

The Big Hug

More on last night's joyful Democratic confab later. In the meantime, here's Secretary Clinton, doing exactly what what we wanted to do after President Obama finished his fabulous speech.

Things To Come?

By Baxter

Could Democrats have asked for a better headline than "Did Donald Trump Commit Treason"?

Well — yeah, actually. Although that one's pretty good. Here are a few more that might be even better.

"FBI Finds Direct Email Link to Putin Spies, Trump"

"Mike Pence's Jerry Sandusky 'Problem'"

"Melania Trump's Citizenship Papers Found To Be Fake"

"Pence College Roommate: 'There's A Reason He's So Anti-Gay'"

"Boarding-School Rape Allegations Against Donald Trump, Jr. Revealed"

"Trump-Maples Sex Tape Linked To Putin Spy Agency"

"Pence Rebukes Trump On Russia, Trump Says He's Fired"

"Records Reveal Ivanka Trump Was Born A Boy"

And you know what? We almost guarantee that we will see at least one of these headlines between now and November. Maybe one of them as early as this week! We cats PURR.

Another Take On The Change Maker

By Sniffles

It occurred to us during Bill Clinton's affectionate speech last night that during her eventful and productive life, there's one change that Hillary Clinton hasn't made: her husband.

We have to admit that she'd have had plenty reason to do it. (And yes, we all know what we're talking about, and we're not going to go into the gory details again, thank you very much.)

But here's the thing: In the reams of commentary about a marriage that — since we're outside of it — we can never completely understand, why don't we see more praise of the sheer durability of the Clinton partnership, and how it speaks to the strength of their characters?

After all, compared to Republicans like Donald Trump (three wives), Newt Gingrich (three wives), Ronald Reagan (two wives), Rush Limbaugh (four wives), Bob Barr (three wives) — and sure, some Democrats we could name, too — Hillary and Bill, through thick and thin, have stuck like glue to one another for more than 40 years.

People who hate them would give you all sorts of sinister reasons for this. We won't. Because when it comes to choosing between a darkly impulsive, thin-skinned, multi-married and immature Republican nominee and the steady, determined, indefatigable and loyal woman we heard described last night — well, we're with her.

Hillary and Bill haven't made it as far as Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter (70 years this month!). But they're working on it. We cats PURR.

DNC, Night Two Was (Almost) A Scream

By Miss Kubelik

Michelle Obama's speech is still in first place, and we'll have more to say on Bill Clinton's remarkable address later. But for now, we cats would like to jump up and make biscuits in the lap of Howard Dean for his charmingly self-deprecating appearance tonight.

Yep, back in 2004 we sure were upset at the bum rap he got in Iowa. Now, it just makes us — and, obviously, him — laugh. We cats are happy to share that with him, and we PURR.

UPDATE: The young Cillizza lad over at The Washington Post doesn't get it. (How could he not? This isn't even the first time Howard's done this.) As Bugs Bunny would say, what a maroon.

It Was The Best Of Times. It Was The Best Of Times.

By Zamboni

One thing you can say about us Democrats, we know how to throw one hell of a party. It doesn't mean that fights aren't breaking out in the corner near the bar. But joy breaks out as well.

That's what we just saw in Philadelphia. What a night! Here are a few of our delighted observations.

Michelle Obama sure showed Frau Drumpf how to give a convention speech, didn't she? She was the headline of the night (and one damn hard act to follow — sorry, Elizabeth and Bernie). We cats also PURR and rub against the legs of Sarah Hurwitz — Hillary Clinton's former speechwriter, now working for Mrs. Obama — whose 2008 words Frau Drumpf stole.

Kinda sad for Cory Booker, though: His brilliant address, which absolutely destroyed everything that last week's Republican Convention was about, thrilled those of us who heard it live — but later, we're afraid, got lost in the A-lister shuffle. In a duller year, he'd have been the standout. But this is the kind of stuff that happens when you have an embarrassment of speaker riches.

We cats have long been fixed, but we think we want to have Al Franken's kittens. And we want to park ourselves in Sarah Silverman's lap and never leave. (Paul Simon, thank you for being late to the stage, giving Sarah the opportunity to deliver the quote du jour.)

As for all those folks demonstrating outside, we fear that no number of spot-on scoldings from Sarah will ever jar them out of their short-sighted zealotry. Thankfully, they represent only 10 percent of Bernie Sanders supporters. We cats PURR again.

DNC E-mail Dump, From Russia With Love

By Baxter

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, we cats were personally lectured by Debbie Wasserman Schultz on e-mail etiquette. Pretty funny, no?

So we HISS at the DNC staffers (and this includes Chairwoman Wasserman Schultz) for saying the stuff they said in the e-mails that WikiLeaks leaked. It made no difference to the outcome of the primaries, and yes, Bernie Sanders is a Democrat of recent vintage. But we agree with our favorite former party chair (and other former DNC chairs, no doubt) that Sanders deserved neutrality.

In other words, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid. And DWS should hop the first train out of Philadelphia, forthwith.

But what's really worrying us is this Russian thing, which the FBI is now investigating. With Donald Drumpf making verbal love to Vlad Pootie and Paul Manafort's pro-Russian business ties, it feels like "The Manchurian Candidate" come true.

Oh, and coincidentally (or not), we cats have noticed that in the last few days, we've had more page views from Russia than from any other country. This has never happened before. It's probably bots — but it kind of creeps us out, and it makes us HISS.

Es Verdad

"It is still dangerous to be LGBT in America. I think it's an unfortunate fact, but one that needs to be said, that lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered... are more likely than any other group in our country to be the targets of hate crimes."

—Hillary Clinton, July 22, 2016

Fun's In Store

By Sniffles

Thomas Jefferson played the violin (tucking it under his chin), and Harry Truman, the piano.

Bill Clinton famously had his saxophone, and Howard Dean his blues guitar.

So while the political world seems to be giving Tim Kaine a universal thumb's up today, we cats are most excited that sometime between now and November, we'll be able to quote our favorite line from "The Sound of Music."

"Why didn't you tell me," says Eleanor Parker to Richard Haydn as the Von Trapps burst into yet another song, "to bring my harmonica?"

(IMAGE: Senator Kaine didn't forget. He's on the left.)

The Birth Of Blue Texas? Or, How Ted Cruz Can Get His Revenge (And The GOP Nomination) in 2020

By Miss Kubelik

So, Donald Drumpf spent the day after his triumphant final night the Republican National Convention how? Slamming Ted Cruz.

Goodness gracious. Under normal circumstances — that is, following a convention that had not just nominated a sociopath — party pooh-bahs would be nursing happy hangovers and falling all over themselves to start organizing and winning. Instead, the GOP is in tortured disarray, and the nominee used the morning after to prove Elizabeth Warren right.

Rafael Cruz, Jr., as we know, is hopping mad about Drumpf's attacks on his wife and his father. Despite his alleged devotion to the teachings of Christ, forgiveness is not in the air. On the contrary: Team Cruz is deep into laying plans for 2020. We saw the first glimmers of it Wednesday night.

But even though Cruz is thirsting for revenge and consumed with ambition, he still has a formidable hurdle to jump: the zillion other Republican wannabes who also foresee disaster in 2016 and who think they're the answer to the GOP's dreams — Baby Marco Rubio, Paul Ryan, John Kasich, Scott Walker, Chris Christie, Ben Sasse, Brian Sandoval, Susana Martinez, Joni Ernst, blah, blah, blah.

How can Cruz stand out from this cast of characters? We cats think we know: Quietly enlist his loyalists in the Lone Star State to tank Texas for the Republicans this November. Then, starting at 9 PM Eastern on Election Day — or whatever time it becomes clear that the Drumpfs are going down in flames — he can campaign as the only savior who can bring those 38 electoral votes back to the GOP.

Senator Cruz, we hope you're reading. We cats PURR.

Worst. Ever.

By Zamboni

Gosh! Can we come out from under the bed now? We cats had no idea that Barack Obama's America was such a frightening place. Healthcare coverage for millions? Terrifying! Unemployment under 5 percent? We're petrified! Stock market above 18,000? Positively knee-knocking. (Of course, if you're driving while black and get pulled over, we guess the country can be a little scary.)

What a strange and dreary speech Donald Drumpf gave last night. "Trump Sets Ominous Tone" is, to our minds, not a good headline. So chalk up "Trump's speech bombs" as one of the things that we correctly predicted could go wrong at the Republican National Convention.

As for the others, fasten your seat belts for the rest of the bumpy ride:

Mitch McConnell was, indeed, booed.

The hate that was spewed about Hillary Clinton was beyond anything even we could have imagined. Secret Service, we hope you were watching.

Rafael Cruz, Jr. may not have gone all Pat Buchanan (he probably does that every day), but he sure went rogue, didn't he? With a satisfied little smirk on his face, too.

As a result, we nearly had some in-the-arena violence as Heidi Cruz had to be escorted out for her own safety. (Her valiant protector: Virginia's own Cootchy! We're so proud.)

Collateral Cruz damage included gay-hater Mike Pence, whose speech was, if not a dud, completely overshadowed.

And um, Melania bombed, too. Except we didn't know that in real time. Thank you, Jarrett Hill!

Finally, yes — people left early and there were rows of empty seats. Good thing the balloons dropped! (Except they almost didn't.) We cats PURR.

UPDATE: Dana Milbank in The Washington Post has reminded us that delegates did, indeed, chant "Build a wall! Build a wall!" We cats rest our case.

Thank You, NBA

For standing up for what is right.

Faces

We cats would like to compare the expressions on the Drumpf family last night with the look on Thugg Romney's face during the second Presidential debate in 2012. 'Nuff said, we think. We PURR and HISS at the same time.

Brewskis

By Baxter

Wow. We don't know what's going to happen tonight, but looking back over our wish list for Republican catastrophes this week, we cats are pretty astounded at how many of them have come true or near-true.

More on that later. (We still have Day Four to get through.) In the meantime, we're thinking a lot about beer.

It's not just because it's baseball season and 98 in the shade. We're remembering that vile adage from 2000 about how voters said they could support the Worst Person Who's Ever Lived for President because they could imagine themselves having a brewski with him. (Except that he was an alcoholic who said he found Christ and was on the wagon.) Ugh, we thought at the time — revolting.

Watching RNC 2016, though, we're thinking that now, we would love having a beer with the Worst Person — first because we think he's drinking again, and second because goodness gracious... if our choice is him or the people we've seen on our TV and computer screens this week, fuhgeddaaboudit.

How hideous this crowd in Cleveland is. They are racist and threatening, vitriolic to the point of attracting Secret Service attention, and — oh, by the way — really, really ugly. They are vulgar. And they are incredibly, overwhelmingly, astoundingly white.

Not our scene, thank you. Their off-the-charts behavior, which has not only slandered one of the most accomplished public servants of our lifetimes but also targeted one of their own, holds no charms for us.

So, who has George W. Bush's phone number? Maybe we should call him, grab a six-pack, and pick his sorry brain about how his Republican Party has come to such an end. We're game — as long as he doesn't insist that Dick Cheney comes along. We cats HISS.

Lest We Furr-get: There Was A 9/11 Before There Was 9/11

By Sniffles

Although Donald Drumpf apparently missed it, you may have heard that the mother of one of the four Americans who died in Benghazi on September 11, 2012, spoke at the Republican Convention and blamed Hillary Clinton for the death of her son.

She's completely wrong, of course. But because Democrats are nicer than Republicans, we want to tell Patricia Smith that we're very sorry for her loss. We're sure she's devastated, and we hope that she finds a healthier outlet for her grief.

But we keep wondering about the two 9/11s. In 2012, we lost four people. In 2001? Three thousand.

Hmmm: Four people... 3,000 people. How is it that the right wingers are so worked up about the four in 2012, but don't care about the 3,000 in 2001?

Since no Republican has ever called for an investigation into how the Worst Person Who's Ever Lived handled the Presidential Daily Brief of August 6, 2001 — let alone the lies his entire Administration told to invade a country that had nothing to do with the first 9/11 — it seems that the GOP is pretty okay with the fact that all those people died. Just sayin'. We cats HISS.

Let Me Photograph You In This Light

By Miss Kubelik

Amazingly — or perhaps not — the Republicans have just nominated an utter charlatan to be President of the United States.

We Democrats are feeling blessed. If the GOP had picked Jeb! Bush or John Kasich, perhaps our fight this fall would be tougher. Instead, we're asked to run against a cartoon. Without taking anything for granted, we are thrilled to engage this battle.

We're reminded that insurgent campaigns — of which the Drumpf effort is a supreme example — rarely are able to make the transition to mainstream establishment alternative. The missteps of the Drumpf campaign have already demonstrated how difficult this is.

We cats readily admit that we are creatures of the establishment, because the party is usually where the policies that end up most benefiting Americans get hammered out. So we generally don't have sympathy for insurgencies. The one that breaks this rule, and which commands our love and loyalties, is Dean for America 2004.

Why? Because even though Governor Dean couldn't make the pivot from insurgency to nomination in 2004, his campaign and its innovations made a lasting impact. They helped elect America's first African-American President in 2008 and 2012 — and, we hope, its first woman President in 2016.

What distinguishes Dean 2004 from Drumpf 2016? Easy-peasy. The Dean forces took the details of campaigning seriously. The Drumpfs couldn't care less. Therein lies the difference, and why Howard Dean will remain a statesman in the Democratic Party, and Donald Trump will remain — well, an idiot. We cats PURR.

In Defense Of The Professionals

By Zamboni

With the Donald Drumpf campaign continuing to embarrass itself, we cats keep thinking about the movie "The Remains of the Day." And not just because we pine for a "Remains of the Day" lunchbox (although we do).

It's because with everything going on with the Republican Party, we are constantly reminded of Christopher Reeve's "Remains" dinner speech. In the film, he tells the assembled guests — including Nazis, who are attending the 1930s "peace conference" as a nefarious ruse — "You are all amateurs."

Indeed, Reeve's character was right, since England and Germany and the rest of the world soon plunged into war. But that "amateur" line has stuck with us.

Why? Because what we're witnessing on the Republican side this Presidential election year is this: The Trumps are making fools of themselves, because they don't know campaigns, and they don't know what they're doing. If Drumpfmania 2016 Day One isn't proof of that, we don't know what is.

Sure, a lot of Americans hate politicians, and are frustrated with government (except when they collect Social Security or use Medicare). And they think that politics is repulsive and dirty. But we cats are here to say that planning and managing competent political campaigns — whether for city manager, county commissioner or President of the United States — is a profession.

There are people who know the right way to do things — like registering voters, coordinating events, managing issues, writing and vetting speeches, organizing, phone banking, canvassing, fundraising, getting out the vote and, if need be, recounting. There are right ways of doing these things, and there are wrong ways. First among the wrong ways: not doing them.

So let's stop this romance with the idea that the Drumpfs can come in and rewrite all the rules, shall we? Because if anything revealed them to be the men behind the curtains that they are, it was the disastrous first day of the 2016 Republican convention. We cats PURR.

Melania Tries To Bring Sleeves Back, Fails

By Baxter

Who are the maddest people in the Republican Party today? You might think it's Donald Drumpf and Ms. Moose & Squirrel, his supermodel wife, since the world has erupted over Frau Drumpf's shameless convention-speech plagiarism. Note to the Drumpfs: If you're going to steal, do it from somebody on your side of political spectrum.

(There will probably be more updates on this speech kerfuffle, because from what we're hearing, it's starting to descend into Melania v. Manafort and Trump v. Trump. Yep, things are going so well — they've got Hillary right where they want her, not.)

But #NeverTrump Colorado delegate Kendal Unruh and Virginia's own Ken "Fetuses Deserve a Roll Call Vote" Cuccinelli must be even madder. After all, had the Moose & Squirrel plagiarism firestorm not erupted last night, they would be on all the Tuesday morning talk shows, expressing outrage over getting screwed by the RNC.

Still, we think that the most pissed-off Republican has got to be the ever-execrable Rudy Giuliani, who has ambitions to be Secretary of Homeland Security or Attorney General or some such thing. Melania's mendacity has pushed Rudy's dystopian, fire-and-brimstone speech clean off the front pages (and off our screens). But somewhere, Michelle Obama is smiling. We cats PURR.

Republican-On-Republican Violence

By Sniffles

Yep, we cats are proud to say that that's our right-wing, woman-hating, Jesus-freaky would-be Virginia governor, Ken Cuccinelli, in this photo, screaming bloody murder at the Republican National Convention today.

Cootchy's on the case! It's enough to make all Cruz fans proud. But except for walking out during the nominating roll call, it looks like the anti-Trump forces are out of options.

That's because even though #NeverTrump had signatures from more than enough delegations to force a roll call vote on their rules change, the temporary convention chair Steve Womack from Arkansas (please note Paul Ryan's absence) shoved through not one, but two voice votes only — and called the Trump supporters the victors. Nothing to see, move along here.

And then things blew up. The Colorado delegation walked out. The Iowa delegation walked out. And the convention spun out of control while remaining delegates fulminated and shouted and fumed.

But that wasn't all, folks. Plenty of verbal fisticuffs were going on even outside of this kerfuffle on the floor. Here are just some of the insults that have flown today.

"This was pretty shocking and shameful. This is not a meeting of the Republican National Committee. This is a meeting of brownshirts. People who act like fascists." (Former New Hampshire Senator Gordon Humphrey)

"@JohnKasich is a jerk-off stoner who will never be President." (Roger Stone)

"John Kasich is embarrassing his party in Ohio...John Weaver thinks that John Kasich will have a better chance to be President by not supporting Donald Trump." (Paul Manafort)

"Manafort’s problem, after all those years on the lam with thugs and autocrats, is that he can’t recognize principle and integrity." (John Weaver)

But our favorite, our absolute favorite, was the vanquished Cruz delegate Kendal Unruh from Colorado, whining that the #NeverTrump folks just wanted their votes to be counted, their voices to be heard.

Just like all those voters in Florida in 2000, right, Kendal? We cats are sure that Unruh's never given a moment's thought to the irony, and we HISS.

Tidbits And Cat Treats: Drumpfmania 2016, Day One Edition

By Miss Kubelik

Oh, goodness gracious, it's here. A passel of unhappy Republican elites are rubbing elbows with teabaggers and Trumpies this very moment! Our furry little heads are spinning in anticipation, but we already have some preliminary observations. Here they are.

It appears that in light of yesterday's events in Baton Rouge, the Drumpfmaniacs plan on doubling down on their inner Richard Nixon. We hate to tell them, but "Make America Safe Again" is ridiculous. You cannot, repeat, cannot make a country that's awash in 300 million guns "safe."

On the other hand, how ironic it would be if the right's fear of young black men wielding firearms would finally get the nation some kind of sensible gun control.

For example: It appears that the gunman in Baton Rouge wasn't just angry about African-Americans dying in police custody — he was a sovereign citizen. Hmmm, that makes things complicated. In fact, it sounds positively Cliven Bundy-esque. We wonder what the Republicans in Cleveland have to say about that.

And here's a question: If today's theme is "law and order," why is Melania Trump still speaking? What does Ms. Moose-and-Squirrel know about criminal justice? We had no idea supermodels were experts on such matters.

Meanwhile, we note with great satisfaction that Michael Folk, that West Virginia Republican who called for Hillary Clinton's execution, has been suspended from his real job, flying for United Airlines. It's gratifying to know that United said they were "appalled" and not just "concerned" or "investigating." A threat is a threat, you know? Oh, and clearly this guy Folk is a home-schooler who never learned proper English. People are hanged, clothing is hung.

Finally, lest you think we've gone off-topic, here's a suggestion to our cable journalists covering today's GOP civil war: How about every time a speaker or a delegate's language goes over the top (and you know it will), the anchors dub it "going full Folk"? We cats PURR.

Like A Lead Balloon

By Zamboni

Reports are that Little Donnie Drumpf is feeling kind of deflated because his VP announcement fell flat. So to gin up excitement, he's thinking of announcing his Cabinet. Oooh! We hope he does it. More fodder.

What the Drumpf forces should be worrying about instead is all the stuff that can go wrong this week in Cleveland. So much already has — why should it stop now?

Here's just some of the mayhem that we're rooting for over the next few days:

Another attempted coup in a key foreign ally, giving Drumpfmania 2016, at best, a split screen on cable TV.

Delegates shout out misogynistic and racist obscenities whenever Secretary Clinton's and President Obama's names are mentioned. (As we know, this is totally possible.)

A reporter, ideally from Telemundo or Univision, gets roughed up on the floor. (Again, as we know, this has happened before.)

Ted Cruz goes all Pat Buchanan on them.

Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell get booed when they speak.

An outraged Sarah Palin tweets "WTF? Alaska's not too far!"

Delegates constantly shout out "BUILD THE WALL!" A Democratic ad custom-made for states like Arizona, no?

There's delegate-on-delegate violence. Colorado would a perfect venue: It's a Cruz-heavy delegation that Trump has accused of being "rigged."

Pence's speech bombs. Ms. Moose-and-Squirrel's speech bombs. Trump's speech bombs.

People start leaving, and the cameras pan rows of empty seats.

And of course, the balloons don't drop. We cats PURR.

And This Chyron On CNN WASN'T The Worst Thing That Happened To Donald Trump Today

By Baxter

Does Donald Trump even know who Tyyip Erdogan is? Aside from this attempted Turkish coup perhaps reminding Americans that it would be folly to put an absolute fool in the Oval Office for the second time in less than 20 years, this was not a great day for Team Trump.

First — oh, that logo. Please. We always knew Trump was a tightwad because his signage is so bad, but this really takes the cake.

Washout quarterback Tim Tebow has told the press that reports he's speaking at Drumpfmania 2016 in Cleveland next week are just rumors. Goodness gracious, how pathetic. Anyone who can't get a third-rate celebrity like Tebow to give him a solid yes/no on the most important Republican event of the year might not be the right guy to make Vladimir Putin bend to his every whim.

Ivanka's rabbi has decided not to speak, either. Why? His Orthodox congregants signed a petition asking that he pull out. Hm! We wonder if it had anything to do with that "sheriff's badge" incident from a couple weeks back.

Finally, we've seen reports that Trump tried to back out of his Mike Pence veep pick last night. Did he not get the positive feedback he thought he would? Or was he thinking that somebody should keep Chris Christie company in Humiliation Land? We cats PURR.

Not Exactly An Oomph Guy

By Sniffles

At one point this afternoon, we wondered if Mike "Religious Freedom" Pence was really and truly going to be Donald Drumpf's running mate. After all, the first rumors were being peddled by Pence's people, and, uh-oh — nobody, but nobody, is allowed to get out in front of the great media mastermind Donald Drumpf.

But now that we're seeing headlines that Mikey is on his way to New York, okay — we take them at their word. With the slight caveat that Drumpf could dump him tomorrow morning and announce our fave, Newtie, instead. (We still want to see those Trump and Gingrich wives campaigning together.)

Meanwhile, let's take stock of Pence. It's a curious choice, because he is so damaged. First, for the Democrats, his selection helps energize the base. But except for Pence's closest friends, we're not sure anyone in the Republican base absolutely loves him.

For 12 years, he was part of the hated GOP establishment. The evangelicals don't trust him because he caved on religious freedom. Big business is furious at how much money his RFRA screw-up cost the state of Indiana. So where's the advantage?

Gingrich, Chris Christie, Mary Fallin or Sarah Palin would have all generated some kind of excitement among the GOP electorate. We don't think that Pence creates any of that kind of oomph.

Finally, as Rachel Maddow has pointed out, the one time Pence was tested on the national stage, he failed.

But, oh, well. Who are we to quibble with a bad veep choice? Not to mention that that passel of 2020 Republican wannabes will have a vested interest in seeing Pence go down in flames along with Drumpf. Memo to Paul Ryan, Marco Rubio, Ted Cruz, Scott Walker, et. al.: Care to comment? We cats PURR.

IMAGE: The great Ann Sheridan, the original "Oomph Girl," who is much easier on the eyes than the creepy Mike Pence.

In Larry's Case, It's "Remain"

You didn't think we weren't going to post about Larry the Cat, did you? David Cameron may be gone, but No. 10's chief mouser is still on the job. We cats PURR.

Making It Matter

By Miss Kubelik

For a little while now, we cats have been working on a theory of Quiet Outrage. We think it's going to make a difference in November. Let us explain.

We're seeing lots of polls that appear to have Hillary Clinton and Donald Drumpf close or near to tied. Our questions always are: National, or state polls? (We don't care about national polls.) If they're state polls, which states? Who are the pollsters? Whom are they talking to, and how? What are the trends? All of these factors make a difference.

At the same time, however, in our own little battleground state, we cats are anecdotally encountering folks who are seething at the ignorance, hatefulness and scorn of Donald Drumpf. They're insulted, we think, and they don't plan to take it lying down.

A newly naturalized citizen from Guatemala, whom we know, is working hard to register her fellow Hispanic citizens in Northern Virginia to vote. An African-American single mother, who is in no way a political animal, volunteered to us her disdain for Drumpf, and her total commitment to voting against him in the fall. These are just two incidents, but we expect there will be more. People are offended, and Donald Drumpf will reap the consequences.

These Latin American and black women are not the kind of people in whose opinions pollsters and Pundit World put a great deal of stock. But we cats say, get ready: They'll be at the polls on Election Day, and their black and Latina lives will matter. And it will make us PURR.

While Bernie Bites The Bullet, Jeb Is Sad. Will The Press Notice?

By Zamboni

Bernie Sanders will endorse Hillary Clinton today. And we cats can just hear the bleatings of Pundit World now.

Will Bernie have been effusive enough? Will he have said all the right things, in every possible way? Will he leave any outs that his most ardent supporters can latch onto and thus stubbornly refuse to join the Clinton train? Oh, that Bernie — isn't he cranky, competitive and endearing?

Meanwhile, none of them — and we mean none — will compare the Sanders endorsement to the very, very, very pointed non-endorsements that the Republican field has given to Donald Drumpf.

Jeb! Bush did it just last night, for heaven's sake. In an interview with the previously Palin-persecuted, now MSNBC talking head Nicolle Wallace, Bush said "I'll be worried" if the Republican ticket wins in the fall.

But it's not just Bush. Unlike Sanders on the Democratic side, you could say — and the media today could point out — that former 2016 contenders John Kasich, Ted Cruz and Lady Lindsey Graham have all refused to come to Jesus on their nominee.

You could also say — and the media could point out — that former Republican nominees Willard Mitt Romney and John McCain have either publicly slammed Trump or given a tortured, tepid endorsement. And you could also say — and the media could point out — that former Republican Presidents have wrung their hands and expressed their concern. How many former Democratic Presidents have refused to support Hillary Clinton? Hm.

Naturally, the pundits will not say any of this when they provide "fair and balanced" coverage of today's event and sift through the embers of the Sanders campaign. But they should. We cats HISS.

In Fiction And In Fact, Brave Women Have Stood For Change (And Gone To Jail)

"Moms' Lives Matter More" — WHUT?

By Baxter

Wow, what is it with these UK right wingers crashing and burning so fast? Post-Brexit, we cats were bracing ourselves for (gasp, choke) Boris Johnson to move into No. 10 — but very quickly he, his erstwhile Tory ally Michael Gove and even anti-immigrant UKIP leader Nigel Farage (ugh) headed for the exits.

And then we were all expected to wait around while the Conservative Party decided between potential PMs Home Secretary Theresa May and Energy Minister Andrea Leadsom. This was supposed to take all summer. But — whoops!

Among other unsavory revelations, Leadsom made the fatal mistake of saying on Friday that she cared more about the future of the United Kingdom because she, um, had kids. Theresa May, um, does not. Leadsom's candidacy exploded faster than a baby with a cacky nappy.

Well, okay, the political situation's not that simple, and we cats realize that. But since we personally have never had kittens and have also been fixed, Leadsom's clumsy and stupid remark really ruffled our fur.

We are so, so sick and tired of people demonizing and labeling one another and painting other groups of people with too-broad a brush — whether it's failed New York politicians criticizing African-American parents, activists condemning all police, Presidential candidates disparaging Muslims and Latinos, or moms discussing non-moms. Just cut it out, everybody. We cats HISS.

Some Shots We Can Live With

By Sniffles

Gosh, we cats sure hated to move the gorgeous Daniel Day-Lewis off the top of the blog, but, hey! — the Republican National Convention is starting in one week! How could we ignore that?

Well... pretty easily, we guess. But the news is so dismal otherwise, what with innocent people getting shot all over the place, that we were casting about for an entertaining subject. We are also kind of bummed that Mike Pence is getting all the latest VP buzz, because personally, we're rooting for Newt. (Think of the wives! Can you imagine Ms. Moose-and-Squirrel and Callista campaigning together?)

So to cheer everybody up — and to send a big raspberry to Mr. Judith Nathan, who chose to lecture African-American parents on MSNBC today — we have devised a fun drinking game for anyone who decides to tune in the RNC and marvel at all the people who aren't there.

It's this: Any time the cameras show a black delegate, take a shot of — well, Trump Vodka would be perfect if it still existed. But any vodka will do. And you may follow it with a chaser of Trump wine.

The good news? By the end of the night, you'll still be sober as a judge, and can drive home safely. Unless, of course, you're black yourself and get pulled over. We cats HISS.

Guns, Natty's Way

By Miss Kubelik

We cats used to think that we would have to move to Canada because The Worst Person Who's Ever Lived invaded Iraq. Or because we would need universal healthcare. But now, we think we might have to move to Canada because of the guns. How in the world did this happen?

If we were to interpret the Constitution like strict, Scalia-esque constructionalists, we would insist that our citizenry only should be able to arm itself like Daniel Day-Lewis in "The Last of the Mohicans." Instead, we find ourselves in the 21st century in a country that is awash in guns. Surely this is not what the Founders intended.

Chaos occurs in all societies. The question is whether it can be averted when access to deadly weaponry can be controlled. This, we cats think, is indisputable. The fact that fringe-y special interest groups can warp a well-intentioned Constitutional amendment to mean that we all should open-carry and distrust one another is obscene in the extreme.

If we cats had our way, we would rip the Second Amendment out of the Constitution. Realizing that that's impossible, we propose that, in the spirit of strict Constitutionalism, only the guns that were legal in 1787 should be protected. Let Micah Johnson try to kill police officers with the rifle that Hawkeye used. We cats PURR.

What A Mitch.

By Zamboni

We cats have nine lives and long memories. So we're sure that, had any Republican Senators skipped out of a Capitol Hill meeting with certain nominee George W. Bush in 1999-2000, they would have received a blistering phone call from their biggest donors the very next day.

Compare and contrast that scenario with the remarkable thing that happened this week: Donald Drumpf came to Congress, and at least a dozen GOP Senators were no-shows. Not only that, but Trump lambasted attendees during a closed-door meeting.

Okay, we know this is very inside-the-Beltway stuff. But let us just say, it is also extremely rare. How is it possible that Mitch McConnell, Senate Majority Leader, didn't stand up and say, I'm sorry — I know, Donald Drumpf, that you're the presumptive Presidential nominee — but you can't talk to my members like this?

Five possible explanations:

1. Mitch McConnell has already written off the Presidential race and has mentally checked out — trying to salvage as many GOP seats as he can — and is not interested in picking fights with the idiot who he's sure is going to lose in November.

2. Mitch doesn't really care about the Republican Senators Trump attacked: Mark Kirk, Jeff Flake and John McCain. If true, this says a lot, and is very sad.

3. Mitch is a coward.

4. Mitch decided he couldn't attend the meeting unless he was drunk on Kentucky bourbon, and therefore was too incapacitated to defend his caucus.

5. Mitch McConnell has been totally bought off by Donald Drumpf and, with millions in his pockets, is sitting quietly by. We cats suggest that observers consider this possibility very seriously. And we HISS.

RFK, Indianapolis, April 4, 1968

"What we need in the United States is not division; what we need in the United States is not hatred; what we need in the United States is not violence and lawlessness, but is love, and wisdom, and compassion toward one another, and a feeling of justice toward those who still suffer within our country, whether they be white or whether they be black."

Well, At Least The Jobs Report Is Good

By Baxter

Just a few early feline thoughts about what happened in Dallas, Texas, last night.

If we don't "get political" and talk about gun violence after something like this, when will we talk about it?

Case in point: Texas is an open-carry state. The African-American civilian who was wrongly ID'd as a "person of interest" at the Black Lives Matter demonstration was carrying (his brother said) an unloaded AR-15. We cats say, so it was unloaded, so what? That unloaded gun could have gotten him, and anyone standing around him, shot and killed once the mayhem began.

Donald Drumpf has managed to behave so far with some restraint. We'll see how long that lasts. Meanwhile, the teabags who support him have already gone way over the top. We expect the Secret Service to visit ex-Congressman Joe Walsh very soon.

Diamond "Lavish" Reynolds is still a hero.

Since we cats are nocturnal creatures, we took in some of last night's live news coverage. The assassination of John F. Kennedy was invoked many times. This morning, Dallas-based NPR correspondent Wade Goodwyn mentioned it as well, with much hand-wringing over the city's storied reputation for hostility and intolerance.

We'd like to point out, as then-UN ambassador Adlai Stevenson could testify, that back in 1963, Dallas was the City of Hate. That was then, of course, and maybe this is now. But we're just sayin'. We cats HISS.

Nothing To Smile About

By Sniffles

You know, there was a time — just a couple of months ago, in fact — when Donald Drumpf effectively sewed up the GOP nomination for President and Republican elites tried to make the best of it. "We can work with him," they mumbled.

But after the food fight that Drumpf had with GOP Senators today, that line of thinking must be one dead idea.

The guy practically threatened Jeff Flake, you know? "Support me or lose your Senate race this year." (Flake pointed out that he was not up for re-election until 2018.) And Nebraska Senator Ben Sasse walked out of the meeting. Gosh! What an amazingly persuasive person Donald Drumpf is! He's succeeded in making us think positive things about Jeff Flake and Ben Sasse!

At the same time, Drumpf has kept up his temper tantrum about his anti-Semitic Hillary Clinton retweet — looking sillier by the minute as he babbles on about Walt Disney and Queen Elsa and where was the outrage about that. (If we were his campaign team, we'd tell him to stop wishing on that particular star.)

Oh, and he cut a deal with Rafael Cruz, Jr. to address the Republican convention. We can only hope that Rafael will pull a Pat Buchanan 1992. Fun!

So here's the bottom line: In a week that saw Pundit World screaming like banshees about Hillary Clinton's emails, Drumpf has once again taken his eye off the ball, indulged his own petty grievances, and wasted more and more valuable time. Sounds good to us. We cats PURR.

Republicans In Congress Can't Fund Zika — But Drumpf Raises Some Dough

By Miss Kubelik

In the midst of Senators dropping out of the Donald Drumpf veepstakes — so long, tiny little Bob Corker, and yes, au revoir, Joni Ernst — the political world is reporting that Drumpf actually managed to raise some money in June. Specifically, $51 mil.

That's a higher number than before — but since Drumpf has raised virtually nothing until now, this is like telling a beginner piano student that he's Rachmaninoff because he's managed to play the first few bars of "Heart and Soul."

In fact, the number would be respectable — if we were talking about a candidate who had come from behind to upset the favorite with a strong showing on June 7 (the last day of the GOP primaries), followed by the party quickly coalescing behind him. But, we're not. And as pundits have pointed out, Hillary handily outraised Drumpf, and Willard Mitt Romney in 2012 was doing better than this.

It also puts more pressure on Drumpf's July numbers. Since he never deigned to email blast his drunk-white-male, knuckle-dragging supporters until now, we don't know if the giving will be sustained. That's one of the problems with leaving grass-roots fundraising until now.

So, respectable — but not great. And not proof of anything, other than the fact that they finally started doing what they should have been doing 12 months ago. We cats PURR.

Big Baby

By Zamboni

Fellow New Yorker-turned-Vermonter Howard Dean says that Bernie Sanders doesn't lose with grace.

"He’s even more competitive than I am," the former Vermont Governor and DNC chair said recently. “He couldn’t stand to lose a pickup basketball game in Burlington."

Governor Dean has known Bernie Sanders a long time, so he must know what he's talking about. But in light of that, we're wondering why Sanders is telling House Democrats that victory doesn't matter.

"The goal isn't to win elections, the goal is to transform America," Sanders said in a closed-door meeting with Democratic members of Congress today. His audience's reaction? They booed him.

We cats join the heckling. Senator Sanders needs to get his head out of the 1960s, shake off his inner Jeremy Corbyn and realize that you can't do crap from the back benches.

Do we know how he feels? Sure. We supported Secretary Clinton in 2008. You remember her — the vanquished candidate (by a much smaller margin than she has defeated Sanders today, by the way), who pulled herself together, held her head up high, and enthusiastically endorsed Barack Obama for President.

With a nutcase like the Republicans are about to nominate, the future of the whole planet's at stake. So grow up, Bernie. We cats HISS.