From the "Cutting Off Their Noses To Spite Their Faces" file: A GOP jackass from Virginia, Representative Randy Forbes, has declared that his party should refuse to fund any gay Congressional candidates.
The two openly gay Republicans who are the subjects of Forbes's disdain are Richard Tisei in Massaschusetts and Carl DeMaio in California. Never mind that both of these guys have a reasonable chance to flip a couple of seats from the Democrats. They're gay, so they're bad.
While we cats sit back to watch the resulting infighting, we can't help but wonder how these two GOP candidates will function should they win their respective elections next year. Tisei, for example, says he'll work across the aisle on important issues. But how can he do that when there are colleagues on his side who think he has no right to be there? (Or no right to be, period.)
Well, it's not really our problem. If the GOP Congressional campaign committee wants to stiff strong candidates in winnable races, that's okay by us. But on principle, we still HISS.
We cats are fixed, so we don't have to worry about having kittens, wanted or otherwise. But the Republicans' war on human women of childbearing age continues.
For example, catch this latest news out of Georgia. The Peach State has more women dying from pregnancy-related conditions than any other place in America: 35 maternal deaths per 1,000 live births. Just a few years ago, Georgia's rate was 20 per 1,000.
Gosh! It's a good thing that Republican Governor and all-around idiot Nathan Deal rejected Obamacare and the zillions of free Medicaid dollars he could have had from the feds. Because it's not as if they need any help with their healthcare down there.
And speaking of Obamacare, get this. Unable to repeal the Affordable Care Act or to get the Supreme Court to invalidate it, Republicans' latest gambit is to claim that the law is horrible because it butts into the patient-doctor relationship.
Really, GOP? Really? Let us cats get this straight. Obamacare is an evil government intrusion into our doctor's (or, in our case, our vet's) office — but it's okay to mandate that physicians prescribe unnecessary ultrasounds for women seeking abortions. And it's just fine to force docs to lie to women about the alleged medical consequences of terminating a pregnancy. And it's hunky-dory to make physicians have hospital admitting privileges before they can perform abortions. And we haven't even gotten to limiting access to birth control.
Do Republicans really not see the contradictions here? It is truly amazing. And while we cats are gladder than ever that our kitten-bearing years are behind us, we still worry about the GOP pushing American women back into the dark ages. Which makes us HISS.
We cats can think of few things more insulting than to file federal income tax as a recognized married couple, and then have to turn around and check "Single" on a state tax form. Yet that's exactly what the Commonwealth of Virginia is forcing same-sex couples to do.
And surprise, surprise: The Virginia Department of Taxation made that decision after checking with state Attorney General Ken "I Hate Everybody But Straight White Males and Fetuses" Cuccinelli — who, as we've thankfully noted, will not be our Governor next year.
We look to Governor-elect Terry McAuliffe to right this repulsive wrong. But in the meantime, we take consolation in the fact that Virginia residents Mary Cheney and Heather Poe, legally married in Washington, D.C., will be forced to deny each other's existence on their Old Dominion form.
In fact, we wouldn't be surprised if Liz, Mary's hatemonger sister (and current family feuder) had a hand in this. We can just hear her phone call to Cucinnelli now: "Okay, Ken — I said I'd run for Senate in Wyoming so you could run against Mark Warner next year if you lost to McAuliffe. You owe me."
We cats received a nice Thanksgiving Day message yesterday from Terry McAuliffe, our Governor-elect of Virginia. Hooray! How appropriate — we can't begin to tell you how grateful we are that Ken "Fetuses Are People, My Friend" Cuccinelli won't be moving into the Executive Mansion in Richmond next year.
We're mystified, though: Even all these weeks after the election, why were the Republicans so against our friend Terry? They said he was an inexperienced novice, a businessman who traded on his connections, and — as a previous DNC chair — a mere gladhander and fundraiser who didn't have the chops to run an entire state.
Goodness gracious. That is the perfect description of Haley Barbour — a deeply networked lobbyist, former chair of the RNC, and all-around GOP hail-fellow-well-met who before 2004 had never held elective office himself. In other words, a fat, Republican version of Terry McAuliffe.
But somehow, in Republican eyes, it was okay for Haley Barbour to be Governor of Mississippi. According to them, he was eminently qualified. But for Terry to be Governor of Virginia? Not so much.
It's just another case of Republicans making rules for the rest of the world, but not applying them to themselves. We cats HISS.
While people's heads continue to explode over Justin Trudeau appropriating a quote from the late NDP leader Jack Layton, we cats — who write for a living when we're not chasing mice — figured we'd better weigh in.
Justin paraphrased Layton this past Election Night, when he made a speech criticizing the New Democrats for running a negative by-election campaign. "It is the Liberal party tonight that proved hope is stronger than fear,
that positive politics can and should win out over negative," he said.
It's the "hope" and "fear" part that has made people mad. Because a few days before his death back in 2011, Layton published a lovely letter to Canadians, saying, in essence, goodbye. "My friends...hope is better than fear," he wrote.
"Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and
optimistic. And we’ll change the world."
We cats think that by itself, the borrowing of "hope" and "fear" is harmless. But our first thought was this: Although those were not Layton's "dying" words, as some have claimed, Jack has been gone only a short time. If we had been Justin's speechwriters Monday night, we would have told him to leave well enough alone.
But then we realized what he was really up to. He was laying down a marker for 2015 — making a definitive statement to Stephen Harper and the Conservative Party that, two years from now, trashy, Republican-style campaigning (of which Harper is so fond; just ask Stephane Dion and Michael Ignatieff) will not be tolerated.
So, NDPers who are loading the Twitterverse with outrage and umbrage: Take the long view. You are not the real target. And in the meantime, it wouldn't hurt to remember your late leader's other famous words: "Love is better than anger."
Isn't it interesting how two very different — but similarly tight — elections can have completely opposite meanings?
Take the race for Virginia attorney general. The state Board of Elections has certified Democrat Mark Herring the winner by a margin of 165. (Since the last we heard, Herring led by 164, glorioski — he not only prevailed in the canvassing, he picked up another vote.)
We cats fully expect the rabid right-wing Mark Obenshain to demand a recount, but for now, those 165 votes mean a total sweep across the Commonwealth for Democrats — in an off-year in which our party holds the White House. That's a super big deal.
Meanwhile, up here in Canada, the Liberals and the Conservatives split the four by-elections held yesterday right down the middle. But goodness gracious — the Tories came this close to losing a previously safe seat in Manitoba, only winning by fewer than 400 votes. This race, then — although carried by the Conservatives — is actually a moral victory for Justin Trudeau and the Liberals.
Aren't politics great? Elections like these are more fun than a catnip-filled Bizzy Ball. We cats PURR.
Welcome to My Cats Are Democrats, a political blog written entirely by cats.
Why cats? Because the sorry state of human discourse requires the Animal Kingdom to step up and provide a new, refreshing take on current affairs. And cats sit at the very top of that kingdom.
We’re well aware of the popular stereotypes — that “cats are Democrats while dogs are Republicans.” But the cats who write this blog really are Democrats. What animal in its right mind wouldn’t be, after the way Republicans have behaved since Obama was elected?
Our Pundit Profiles will tell you more about us. To join the conversation, see our Comments Policy.
If you'd like to write us directly, please send an e-mail to email@example.com.
Baxter (no relation to the spokescat for Meow Mix) was named after Jack Lemmon's character in "The Apartment." Although Baxter keeps his sexual orientation private, he is an FIV-positive kitty with a keen interest in gay rights.
Guest blogger Miss Kubelik also owes her moniker to that classic Billy Wilder film. As a former outdoor cat, Miss K provides trenchant political commentary from outside the Washington bubble, looking in.
Sniffles' issues are equality for women and climate change, although she seems to think she can escape global warming by hiding under a blanket. If Sniffles doesn’t agree with something you say, she’ll probably pee on you.
Zamboni is a hockey fan (of course). She follows Canadian and American politics, and is a zealous protector of English grammar. Zamboni's favorite things include clean litter boxes and Bush being out of office — two items she considers related.
Stuff We Love
The Adorable Care Act
Photos We Love
Nelson Mandela, 1918-2013
Other Photos We Love But That Have Nothing to Do With Politics
"Oh, How Sad"
Human Beings We Will Miss
Adrienne Rich, 1929-2012
Allan Arbus, 1918-2013
Ann Rutherford, 1917-2012
Ann Usher McKay, 1920-2009
Barbara Billingsley, 1915-2010
Beatrice Arthur, 1922-2009
Blossom Dearie, 1926-2009
Bob Edgar, 1943-2013
Carolyn A. Dekle, 1954-2010
Celeste Holm, 1917-2012
Claiborne Pell, 1918-2009
Dagmar Wilson, 1916-2011
Daniel Inouye, 1924-2012
Dave Brubeck, 1920-2012
Del Martin, 1921-2008
Dorothy Height, 1912-2010
Dorothy Rodham, 1919-2011
Earl Scruggs, 1924-2012
Eartha Kitt, 1927-2008
Edward Woodward, 1930-2009
Edwin Newman, 1919-2010
Etta James, 1938-2012
Eydie Gorme, 1928-2013
Frank Kameny, 1925-2011
Fred Bondy, 1931-2010
Fred Shuttlesworth, 1922-2011
Gene Barry, 1919-2009
George Carlin, 1937-2008
George McGovern, 1922-2012
Gore Vidal, 1925-2012
Hamilton Jordan, 1944-2008
Harry Morgan, 1915-2011
Irving R. Levine, 1922-2009
Isaac Hayes, 1942-2008
Jack Layton, 1950-2011
James Whitmore, 1921-2009
Jo Stafford, 1917-2008
Jody Powell, 1943-2009
John Hope Franklin, 1915-2009
John Lawrence, 1943-2011
Joni Decker, 1945-2011
Kevin McCarthy, 1914-2010
Lena Horne, 1917-2010
Marian McPartland, 1918-2013
Marvin Hamlisch, 1944-2012
Maxine Cohen Lando, 1950-2012
Nancy Fyfe, 1933-2012
Natasha Richardson, 1963-2009
Nina Foch, 1924-2008
Patricia Neal, 1926-2010
Paul Newman, 1925-2008
Peg Kempel, 1920-2011
R. Sargent Shriver, 1915-2011
Ravi Shankar, 1920-2012
Ray Harryhausen, 1920-2013
Robert C. Byrd, 1917-2010
Robert Prosky, 1930-2008
Robert Reno, 1939-2012
Russell Means, 1939-2012
Russell Train, 1920-2012
Sally Ride, 1951-2012
Sam Denoff, 1928-2011
Sarah Mae Jones, 1982-2012
Soupy Sales, 1926-2009
Stephanie Tubbs Jones, 1949-2008
Steve Jobs, 1955-2011
Stewart Mott, 1937-2008
Stewart Udall, 1920-2010
Studs Terkel, 1912-2008
Theodore Sorensen, 1928-2010
Tom Wicker, 1926-2011
Vaclav Havel, 1936-2011
Van Johnson, 1916-2008
Walter Cronkite, 1916-2009
Quotes We Love
"Can you remember a time in your lifetime when a major political party was just sitting around, begging for America to fail?" —Bill Clinton
Links That Make Us Roll Over and Expose our Bellies for Happy Rubs