Cat Fight! King vs. Inhofe vs. Coburn vs. Cole vs. Lukas vs. Lankford vs. Bridenstine vs. Mullin

By Sniffles

We cats were hoping that the Congressman from the Second District of New York would run into the senior Senator from Oklahoma in the halls of the Capitol today.

And punch him in the mouth.

That's because we saw the ever-creepy James Inhofe tell Chris Jansing on MSNBC that federal disaster aid to his tornado-ravaged state would be "totally different" from the Superstorm Sandy bill he voted against in January. Totally different!

If Peter King was watching, he must have blown a gasket, because we're not sure Congressman King's blood pressure has gone down since his colleagues took that despicable Sandy vote. (And kudos to Jansing for asking the question, by the way. Inhofe shouldn't be able to give a single tornado-related interview without having Sandy flung in his face.)

King calmed himself enough to give a gracious statement to the press today. "I don’t want to hold the people of Oklahoma responsible for what elected officials are saying," he said. Take that, Senator.

If it's any consolation to King, we cats think that what goes around may be coming around. The all-Republican Oklahoma Congressional delegation is split on whether any aid to their suffering state should be offset by spending cuts elsewhere.

Since the GOP budget hawks did not prevail in offsets for Sandy, Oklahomans could reasonably ask why their aid should be similarly held hostage (and possibly delayed).

This isn't a mere cat fight. It's more of a rumble. We cats PURR.

You Can't Hate The Funder If You Love The Funds

By Baxter

We cats have launched a petition at whitehouse.gov that our good friends in the Obama Administration probably find irritating — and that many of you may also think is in poor taste. But here it is: We're against any federal disaster assistance going to the state of Oklahoma.

We don't care how correct and concerned Rachel Maddow is being about today's tornadoes, and that Oklahoma's teabagger Governor has already asked President Obama for help, and that the President has promised it. We are sorry that our federal tax dollars are going to this cause.

Yes, it's about Superstorm Sandy relief. (Three of five Oklahoma Congressmen voted against it.) Yes, it's about the teabag vilification of a decisively elected Democratic President. Yes, it's about denial of global warming. And yes, it's about Oklahoma refusing $50 million in federal money to implement Obamacare.

They won't accept subsidies for preventive healthcare, but they want emergency relief? Sorry, but that logic escapes us.

(And as one of our more sympathetic correspondents has pointed out: If the roles were reversed — and the Rushoids and the Freepers and their Republican friends believed in climate change — just imagine what they'd be saying about God's message to people who built suburbs without basements in them.)

You know what? Oklahoma gets back $1.35 for every dollar it sends to Washington. If the Sooner State dislikes the federal government so much, we cats say, let our tax dollars go to pay for wildfire relief in California. Here's the petition if you'd like to sign it.

(IMAGE: Superstorm Sandy. And now, sequestration is wreaking havoc on victims of this storm. Thanks for nothing, GOP.)

Angus's Beef

By Zamboni

Wow, we can hardly stand on our little cat feet today. We've been hit with a wave of Harpergate resignations and revelations and accusations. Excuse us while we pick ourselves up and groom ourselves. (Okay, done.)

For those of you who do not breathlessly check Canadian media every day, news flash: On the heels of the resignation of Prime Minister Stephen Harper's chief of staff in the Conservatives' expenses scandal, two Tory senators have also called it quits.

From the Senate, you ask? Why, no. These fine folks have not had the decency to step down entirely from Parliament's upper house, despite their alleged respective financial improprieties. They've merely resigned from the Conservative caucus.

We cats say, big deal. We realize that we're talking about a parliamentary system here, but this strikes us as lame. So they're foregoing the free party-caucus breakfasts they get when Parliament is in session? Are they still voting on legislation, albeit as independents? We're not sure we'd want this Senator Mike Duffy guy (above), who bears a striking resemblance to Jabba the Hutt, deciding "yay" or "nay" on issues that affect our lives. Just sayin'.

Meanwhile, the NDP's ethics firebrand, Charlie Angus, is demanding the Royal Canadian Mounted Police open an investigation into the senators' expense reports, and Harper's top guy writing a check to cover them. "I am concerned that such acts may violate the laws that the RCMP is charged with upholding and enforcing," he said. Ya think?

We cats are leaving for Canada later this week. Should be fun.

Rolling Heads

By Miss Kubelik

You have to say this for Barack Obama: When he fires somebody, it's fast, and it's brutal. Kind of like a drone strike.

Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper, on the other hand, has no such surgical precision. Just this past Friday, he said there was no way Nigel Wright, his chief of staff, did anything illegal by giving a glad-handing Tory Senator $90,000 to cover his inappropriately billed travel expenses. Nope, Nigel wasn't going anywhere.

Until today. Suddenly, poof — Nigel's gone.

Hmmm, resigning on a Sunday — on Victoria Day weekend, no less. And with a press release. Did the PMO think no one would notice? But of course, the written statement did rush to declare that Harper was not "advise[d]" on what Nigel was doing with his checkbook. That, they want you to remember.

We cats think Stephen Harper has a rough week ahead of him. Because if Nigel thought he could spare his boss some grief by skedaddling today — well, let's just say Wright was wrong.

Vive La France!

Yes, we know that the marriage equality fight in France has been riven with discord, but now it is the law of the land. And we'd like to think that freedom fighters like Rick Blaine would approve. So, let the destination weddings begin!

Umbrellas

By Sniffles

Is there anything more American than Gene Kelly and Debbie Reynolds with an umbrella? Singin' In The Rain is the iconic symbol of Yankee "pick-yourself-up-dust-yourself-off" ingenuity and spunk.

So why is the famous quitter from Alaska — not to mention the rest of the right-wing blogosphere — railing against umbrellas?

We'll tell you why: Because President Obama used one the other day.

What were we cats just saying about the Republicans jumping the shark? We're sorry, but getting sheltered from the rain is something that goes along with the office of President of the United States. It also comes with being the Queen of England, and Augusta golfers, and Winston Churchill.

We thought that the famous quitter from Alaska, hater of the "lame-stream media" that she is, would have instantly appreciated the fact that the President and the Turkish Prime Minister got umbrellas — while the press had to sit in the open, in the rain.

If this is not a perfect example of how over the top Republicans have gone, we cats don't know what is. Because this will continue to hamper the GOP in their anti-Obamaism, we cats PURR.

The Shark Has Been Jumped

By Baxter

Let us cats lead us all into a chorus of appreciation for the notion of restraint.

Why? Because the political arena has had precious little of it lately. And that's where we see the Republican Party shooting itself in the foot.

"If the GOP base is driven into scandal hyperdrive," reports Greg Sargent in The Washington Post, "it 'will strengthen the party factions most dubious about any compromises with Obama,' while weakening the influence of Republicans 'who believe the party must reboot to restore its competitiveness for the White House.'"

Translation: Instead of Obama being crippled by "scandals," the Republicans could further be roiled, divided between the base and Beltway — not just about how to respond to today's events but going into 2014 and '16 as well.

We cats find this delicious. Even though AP and the IRS raise some serious concerns, the GOP is hobbled. Why? Because they've cried wolf too many times. You don't go totally over the top on birth certificates, healthcare reform, debt ceilings, abortion, climate change, sequesters, etc., without paying the price for it later.

If, in the early days of the Obama Administration, the Republicans had only conducted themselves with decorum — if they had accepted the President's social invitations, and agreed to work with him, and adhered to the old rules of Washington politesse (instead of outright accusing him of being a Marxist-Socialist-Kenyan bent on America's destruction) — they might have some credibility today.

But they didn't, and they don't.

Therefore, Louie Gohmert railing against Attorney General Eric Holder yesterday was nothing but a clown show. Gohmert has no dignity — unlike Tom Railsback, Elizabeth Holtzman or Peter Rodino in 1974.

Michele Bachmann using the "I" word is an immediate joke. Who would listen to Michele Bachmann?

Republicans established their nutcase credentials well before any of these juicy "scandal" opportunities came to light. If they had behaved like serious human beings in the past, maybe the world would listen to them today. But, sorry. They've blown it. We cats PURR.