Saturday, February 17, 2018

The Best Words

By Miss Kubelik

Donald Drumpf, who is known for more sensationalist and incendiary speech, visited Broward County, Florida, last night after the Parkland school shooting. Did he have any Presidential words of condolence? "It’s sad something like that could happen," he said.

So on top of being nearly killed, the surviving Parkland kids had the supremely bad luck of being shot at when the eloquent Barack Obama was no longer President. Maybe Melania, who one of our Twitter buddies observed was dressed like a nurse, was able to offer them some deeper comfort. (OTOH, she could be in need of some herself.)

Can we all just admit it now? Even if Wee Donald were not a Russian-loving traitor, which Robert Mueller appears to be laying the groundwork to prove, he would be completely inadequate for his current job. Not just because he appeals to hate and divides Americans, but because even in normal political circumstances he'd be unable to muster words that the nation needs to hear.

With a more compliant audience, an ineffectual Commander-in-Chief could skate by on the reputation of his office. But this is different. The Broward teens who are fearlessly stepping up and speaking out have no regard for Drumpf and are unawed by this Presidency. Maybe because all they see is scandal and chaos in Washington? Or because the Republicans' tax law just screwed them over, student-loan-wise? Or maybe it's climate change or reproductive rights — or all the other things that got them mad before this week's massacre.

These kids know: The Trumpsters are waging war on them. So they're fighting back, with more articulation and wisdom than our ridiculous President will ever have. Our money's on them. We cats PURR.

Friday, February 16, 2018

It's Another Great Infrastructure Week!

By Zamboni

In a week that's already been dominated by the Rob Porter security-clearance scandal and the Marjory Stoneman Douglas school shooting, Special Counsel Robert Mueller has stepped in today and set off an explosion. He's indicted 13 Russians for crimes against humanity (that's our characterization, not his) — and let's just say that nobody's talking about infrastructure, okay?

Or about the allegedly fabulous Republican tax bill. The Trumpsters and the GOP have lost another week, and the 2018 clock is ticking.

Suffice to say that although the Trumpsters — including the head Trump himself — are trying to spin Mueller's indictment as "no collusion," from what we've read, they have a lot to worry about. Mueller is laying groundwork for his case, and he must tell the Russian side of the story before he can tell the American one. And as a favorite tweeter of ours (a smart lawyer) has pointed out, it's only a matter of time before "unwitting" becomes "intentional."

We also need to mention that on the non-Russia front, Trump suffered a blow (pun intended) from another story by the intrepid Ronan Farrow, who — perhaps on a crusade against Woody Allen? — has made celebrity males' sexual mendacity his beat. A Playboy bunny has alleged an affair (ugh) with Trump at about the same time as the Stormy Daniels episode. Which makes us wonder a few things.

To the so-called religious leaders who defend Trump: How many mulligans does he get? Is there a limit? How many affairs equal one Supreme Court justice? Does he get a mulligan for each extramarital affair, or does one mulligan cover a multitude of them? Dear readers, if you're planning to attend church this weekend, perhaps you could ask someone about this. We cats PURR.

And One Great Idea.

We cats love this, and can't wait to send one to our Republican member of Congress. Midterms, here we come!

Thursday, February 15, 2018

Two Ideas.

By Sniffles

We cats have been inspired by the fearless students of Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, several of whom got on TV today and told the sociopath in the Oval Office and the Republican cowards in Congress to do something.

We sincerely hope that Douglas students will have the chance to get into Trump's face on his visit tomorrow. Knowing, though, that Trump will be loath to put himself in the kind of situation where that could happen, we would like to make the following two suggestions.

Trump will no doubt meet with first responders — that's the kind of crowd he feels safe in. When he does, one of them should ask him to recite verbatim and aloud the prayer that Trump claimed he said for them yesterday. And whoever makes the request should starting sinking to his knees when he asks it, so everyone can join in. Because of course Trump would be able to comply... right?

Some bereaved Broward parent, grandparent or just plain outraged resident should immediately declare his or her candidacy for the Senate against Baby Marco Rubio, and spend the next four years harassing his NRA-funded ass. Why wait? That would make us cats PURR.

Wednesday, February 14, 2018

It's Valentine's Day, And We've Had A Massacre

By Baxter

Guess this is another week that the Republicans haven't been able to sell their tax cut, isn't it?

It isn't just that 17 people were mowed down by an AR-15 at a South Florida secondary school today. The bad news for the GOP started way before bullets started flying at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High:

1. Stormy Daniels said that all bets were off now that Michael Cohen has 'fessed up to personally paying her $130,000. Their deal has been broken, she says, and she's ready to talk.

2. The Trumpsters' revolting box o' bad food for SNAP families went over like a lead balloon.

3. Mike Pence at the Olympics? He went over like a lead balloon, too.

4. Scott Pruitt's travel abuses are getting almost as much scrutiny as David Shulkin's. What is it about these rich guys who think they can steal from American taxpayers? This is also an excellent opportunity to remind everybody that Janet Reno flew coach.

5. Finally, on the Rob Porter security scandal front, turns out it wasn't just 30 or 40 White House staffers who didn't have proper clearance — it was more like 100. Including Ivanka. Lock them up! We cats HISS.

Tuesday, February 13, 2018

Sean Hannity's Optical Delusion

By Miss Kubelik

Well! The Obama-portraits story probably won't have as long a shelf life as the Rob Porter security-clearance scandal — which just keeps getting worse for the Trumpsters. (And ironic beyond words, after all the screams of "Lock her up!" last year.) But for paintings that were unveiled more than 24 hours ago, they're still getting a fair amount of what in the pre-digital age we used to call ink.

It seems that Sean Hannity saw something naughty in the Barack portrait, posted about it on his website, and then tried to remove the post. Clearly he's suffering from the same delusion Paul Ryan has — that the Internet isn't forever. Sorry, Sean, but you've already been archived.

So what we're left with is not just the notion that idiotic right-wing white guys are obsessed with a handsome African-American man's sex life — but that maybe the Obama-ensconced-in-the-ivy-at-Wrigley-Field painting is... well, growing on us. We weren't in love with it at first, but if it's driving the enemy crazy, it must be pretty good.

Meanwhile, we offer this retrospective. It reminds us all how terribly pedestrian Presidential portraits can be, and how, when they digress from the usual — as Obama's has, and as Aaron Shikler's painting of John F. Kennedy did — they can be a lot more interesting. We cats PURR.

Monday, February 12, 2018

Portrait Of A (First) Lady

We like Amy Sherald's painting of Michelle Obama. We're not so sure about Barack's. Check it out: Did our former President pose at Wrigley Field? That can't be right for a South Side kind of guy.

Still and all, we cats enjoyed hearing the speeches by both Obamas today. They reminded us of better days, and we PURR.