Luko Nails It, Too

 

Naomi Nails It

 

Happy Victoria Day!

Gosh, it's nice to be in Canada right now. Everything's more pleasant here. (Except for Leafs and Jets fans, of course.) We cats PURR.

(IMAGE: Brittlestar, taking his own advice and wearing something fun.)

Hang In There, Joe

By Hubie and Bertie

Some innocent soul on Bluesky tonight said that Jake Tapper should cancel his anti-Biden book tour now that the former President has been diagnosed with an aggressive form of prostate cancer. HA! Are you kidding?!?!?!? Jake Tapper is thrilled. Now, every story about Biden's prostate health can include a handy reference to Tapper's stupid book. Ka-ching for Jake! This is what journalism has sunk to.

Here's what we're thinking tonight. In September 2016, Benedict Donald promised to release his full medical records. We're all still waiting. Why aren't reporters constantly asking about that? Trump is continuing to say and do bizarre things — walking unsteadily, posting odd screeds on social media, acting like "groceries" is a new concept — and the press gives him a pass. But Dark Brandon has to prove every second of every day that he's mentally and physically competent. We'll never understand it.

Biden and Harris were a terrific team, and they did great things for our country. They rescued the US from Trump's COVID depression, created millions of jobs, gave thousands student debt relief, brought us $35 insulin, championed clean energy, put Ketanji Brown Jackson on the Supreme Court, and — to the delight of our net worth — presided over a booming stock market. Thanks to them, we were proud to be Americans again. We cats salute the old dude from Delaware who made us feel that way, and we send him all our love and support. And we PURR.

No More Nottoway

By Miss Kubelik

We cats are not generally in favor of historic places burning down, but we're willing to make an exception in this case.

Louisiana's Nottoway Resort, the largest antebellum plantation in the South, was destroyed on Thursday. Since it was marketed as a wedding and special-event venue with nary a mention of the suffering that enslaved people endured there, we're not crying salty tears over its obliteration. In fact, considering how much hostility the current Republican Administration shows toward Americans of color, it's easy to be sympathetic to all the local folks who posed for gleeful selfies with the burning plantation house.

Our country is so hell-bent on going to right-wing hell today that the loss of Nottoway, believe it or not, makes us cats grin. We don't actually love it. But this particular bit of karma makes us PURR.

"I Will Not Yield To Disrespectful Men"

By Zamboni

We've probably said this before, but when Bernie Bro-ette Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez was elected to Congress in 2018, our first thought was, "OMG, she's going to be a pain in the ass."

Boy, were we wrong. Totally wrong. AOC is so, so impressive.

From the moment of her arrival in 2019, she learned the rules of the House, worked with then-Speaker Pelosi and her fellow Democrats across the ideological spectrum, refused to take any bait from clowns like Marjorie Taylor Greene, and, without a lot of fanfare, went to work. Any time the spotlight was on her, it was usually because others shone it her way and not because she gratuitously sought it.

She's also grabbed headlines because she's particularly brilliant in Committee. (Like this example from yesterday.)

And there's an even happier ending: AOC's antagonist, Republican Congressman Randy Weber from Texas, ate some humble pie — to the chagrin of MAGAts everywhere, no doubt. "Alexandria, you didn’t deserve what I hit you with," he said. "I shouldn’t have done that and I apologize." Replied AOC, "I completely accept."

Emasculation complete — and well-deserved. We cats PURR.

This Swag Is Not Swell

By Baxter

As if Jeff Bezos hasn't given us enough reasons to stop buying stuff on Amazon, this comes along: The site is peddling fake ICE and border patrol merch for inadequately endowed white males who amuse themselves by acting like they have the authority to seize allegedly undocumented people off the streets.

The swag is on Etsy, too. This is distressing to all of us who buy from small businesses and creators on that site.

In hearings today, Congresswoman Julie Johnson (D-TX) said to Homeland Security cosplayer and famous puppy killer Kristi Noem: "Are you aware that ICE agent jackets are available on Etsy for $20? Anybody can throw a mask on and run around and terrorize people of color without any regard for the law because your agency does not have proper protocols to make sure your agents are clearly identified."

Nothing gives us a skeevier feeling than seeing those masked men grabbing people and hustling them off. Who are they? Hired guns from Erik Prince and Blackwater? Pardoned Jan-Sixers? Both? (We actually suspect the Jan-Sixers, because so many of them are out of shape.)

We've called out Etsy on social media but aren't expecting them to explain themselves or, better, take the merchandise down. Which means we'll have to seriously rethink patronizing that site anymore. Another thing Benedict Donald has ruined for us. We cats HISS.

Not On Our Summer Reading List

It's pretty rich that journalists are congratulating each other on the air for publishing unflattering books about Joe Biden — less than four months after he left office — when their failure over the last 10 years to cover Benedict Donald properly or hold him to account in even the slightest way helped elect him to the White House not once, but twice.

Also, we had a President in a wheelchair before. Worked out pretty well. We cats HISS.

"White Sox Or Cubs"?

By Sniffles

Right out of the gate, Pope Bob — oops, Leo XIV, of course — met with members of the media today, and guess what! He didn't ramble strangely about dolls and pencils. He didn't whine about "fake news." He didn't tell anyone they were a disgrace or should be ashamed of themselves for asking a question.

Nope, that's Benedict Donald territory — Chicago Pope knows better. In fact, he drew some applause by talking about journalists around the world who have been jailed for speaking truth to power.

"The suffering of these imprisoned journalists challenges the conscience of nations and the international community, calling on all of us to safeguard the precious gift of free speech and of the press," he said. "The Church recognizes...the courage of those who defend dignity, justice, and the right of people to be informed, because only informed individuals can make free choices."

Leo also asked the press to refrain from using divisive and combative language, which is a great suggestion that you shouldn't expect Rupert Murdoch or the British tabloids to take for one second. But shining a light on the 500+ reporters who have been hauled off to the hoosegow (or worse) is never a bad thing. It was also a reminder for all the privileged members of the corporate-owned American media who still haven't realized what Trump 2.0 means for them (and the country).

So far, so good on this new Pope, right? Today, he tactfully refused to pose for a selfie, but he did sign somebody's baseball! We cats think this should become a thing, and we PURR.

GOP, The Ball's In Your Court (For The Eleventy Billionth Time)

"No title of nobility shall be granted by the United States: And no person holding any office of profit or trust under them, shall, without the consent of Congress, accept of any present, emolument, office, or title, of any kind whatsoever, from any king, prince, or foreign state."

–US Constitution, Article I, Section 9, Clause 8

"The President shall, at stated times, receive for his services a compensation, which shall neither be increased nor diminished during the period for which he shall have been elected, and he shall not receive within that period any other emolument from the United States, or any of them."

–US Constitution, Article II, Section 1, Clause 7

This Seems Bad. Yes, It's Bad.

The Trumpsters are talking about arresting members of Congress now. In case you didn't think we were in trouble before, know that we are now. Or as Senator Brian Schatz (D-HI) put it, "These people are completely fucking out of control, and of course I’m going to say that. But we need to hear some Republicans stand up for lawful behavior, or we are going to take a very dark and possibly permanent turn as a nation."

Big Week For The Church — End It On A High Note!

And the best news is that, believe it or not, Tom Lehrer is still with us. Ninety-seven years young. We cats PURR.

Tidbits And Cat Treats: V-E Day (And Other Victories) Edition

By Hubie and Bertie

Today was not a good day for Benedict Donald — his "big trade announcement" with the UK was not big (at least, the details are murky), and ended up being completely overshadowed by the new Pope. An American Pope! Trump was so upset about all this that he toddled out onto the West Colonnade to beg some attention from the press. We consider this a win. And in fact, here are some more:

Robert Francis Prevost is not just American, he's Peruvian — the second Pope from Latin America, since he served many years in Peru and holds citizenship there. So, okay, he's not going to be a trailblazer on issues like women and gay rights, but he's berated JD Vance on social media and is a champion of migrants. Consider him a Trump nemesis (as nemesis-y as pontiffs can be, that is). We didn't get the progressive Filipino guy or the Italian named Pizzaballa (we kid you not), but that's all right, we're not Catholic. So we'll take Prevost.

Also pleasing is Prevost's choice of name — first, because the most famous Leo is a cat (Leo the Lion, of course), but also because the most recent Leo was known as "the social Pope" and "the Pope of the Workers." Leo XIII supported workers' rights, trade unions, and fair wages. He must have been a real shocker in the late 19th century! (Not to mention today, because the MAGAts are not, not, not happy. Yay!)

All that serious stuff aside, the Pope jokes on the interwebs today — most of them Chicago-themed — were top-drawer. (Our favorite is "And also with youse.") Well, done, everybody.

Meanwhile, amid all the pope-y excitement, Benedict Donald folded on his revolting nomination for US attorney in Washington, DC. Ed Martin was a Jan-Sixer who was fomenting violence at the Capitol that day, for God's sake! He was truly one of the worst nominees Trump could have possibly come up with (with the possible exception of Jeanine Pirro, rumored to be Martin's replacement, but we'll see how far Judge Box o' Wine gets). Bottom line? If there was ever any doubt that Martin critic Thom Tillis of North Carolina would get a Trump-endorsed primary opponent, this pretty much seals the deal.

Finally, let's not forget that today is the 80th anniversary of the Allies' victory in Europe in World War II. Trump observed it idiotically, as you'd expect, with a post featuring a famous image from the Pacific theater. But who cares about him? The important thing is that the West defeated fascism once before, and if necessary, we can win the battle once again. The recent elections in Canada, Australia — and even the freaking College of Cardinals — give us hope. We cats PURR.

(PHOTO: Celebrations in London, 1945 — Getty Images)

"Crazy Eyes" Griffin Throws In The Towel

By Miss Kubelik

If Thomas Jefferson were alive today, he'd be suing Jefferson Griffin for unlawful use of his name. We've always wondered how a Republican nutcase who refused to abide the will of the people could be linked in any way to the author of the Declaration of Independence. (You know, that document that slams princes who impose their "arbitrary will" over the rule of law? That one.)

Anyhoo, Not-Jefferson Griffin has finally, finally, finally admitted that he lost the 2024 North Carolina Supreme Court race to Democratic Justice Allison Riggs. Republicans will no doubt praise Griffin for his patriotism and selflessness — completely ignoring the fact that he, and they, have spent the last six months trying to overturn a fair election.

Which means the headlines that say "Griffin concedes" should actually be "Republican Stops Attempt to Steal Supreme Court Seat." Or, the press could compare Griffin's behavior to Al Gore's in 2000 — except for the fact that Gore accepted a judicial decision immediately, whereas Griffin... didn't. He tried to toss out thousands of cast ballots, including those from military members serving overseas.

Nevertheless, it's a relief, because had the situation gone the other way, it could have been disastrous for American democracy. And not just here at home, because antidemocratic behavior is sadly contagious. For example, Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre in Canada still has not called Liberal Bruce Fanjoy to concede defeat in his Ontario riding. It's not just pathetic, childish, and disgusting, but the first step to unraveling our electoral systems. We cats HISS.

Carney Meets The Carny

By Zamboni

This photo of Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney with Benedict Donald outside the West Wing is hilarious. Carney looks happy. Donald just looks annoyed. (Or maybe he's having a real Admiral Stockdale moment: "Who am I? Why am I here?" It would be nice if the press were as interested in Trump's cognitive abilities as they were obsessed by Biden's.)

But back to today's meeting. Some in the Canadian media speculated that however the encounter goes, Carney wins. If Donald behaves well, he's been cowed. If he doesn't, he just makes Canadians mad all over again and re-rallies them around their new government.

It also gives Carney the opportunity to employ a "gray-rocking" strategy, which some folks adopt when they encounter narcissistic (i.e., Trumpy) personalities. Narcissists manipulate people with deliberately outrageous behavior because they get off on others' reactions to it. Gray-rocking, however, short-circuits the process.

Gray-rocking narcissists "involves making all interactions with them as uninteresting and unrewarding as possible," one medical site explains. "In general, this means giving short, straightforward answers to questions and hiding emotional reactions to the things a person says or does... [to] cut off a person’s 'narcissistic supply' and cause them to lose interest in their target."

From what we've seen so far, it's working. Carney is calm, reasonable, and restrained, refusing to be baited by demented Donald comments like "51st state" and "We don't do much business with Canada."

His facial expressions as Trump blathered do give away some of his feelings, though. (Hilariously, and social media has noticed.) It's like watching Ron MacLean's reactions when Don Cherry spouted his racist, hateful, nationalistic bullshit on "Hockey Night in Canada." But all in all, we'd say Carney has outskated Trump today. We cats PURR. 

UPDATE: At his presser this afternoon, Carney was asked, "What was going through your mind when Trump talked about erasing the border?" Carney replied, "I'm glad you couldn't tell what was going through my mind." LOL! (Oh, no, Mark — we could. We cats PURR again.)

A Fairy Good Take On Our Long National Nightmare

Randy Rainbow does it again. We cats PURR.

Kemp v. Ossoff Is Off

By Baxter

Senator Jon Ossoff (D-GA) has a big fan club, and no member of it is more devoted to him than the wildly entertaining social media influencer who's dubbed him "Senator My Boo." We agree. Ossoff/My Boo is attractive for a lot of reasons, from the personal to the political. (Sartorially, we cats like him in glasses for that Clark Kent-y/Jeff Goldblum-y look, both on and off the job. )

Senator My Boo got some excellent news today: Republican Governor Brian Kemp of Georgia will not run against him in 2026. Kemp was the GOP's best hope to unseat Ossoff, but it seems he didn't relish the idea of running in a year when everyone will be throwing up on Benedict Donald's sucky economy. Which leaves Georgia Republicans with a bunch of nutbags and crazies with no statewide appeal (think MTG).

It's also a win for Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer — but nobody will spin it that way, of course. Oh, well. We cats PURR.

The Down-Under Horse Race That Wasn't

By Sniffles

Is there cosmic significance that yesterday's Kentucky Derby winner was a horse named "Sovereignty"? (Benedict Donald, take note — if you're not too busy upsetting Catholics with fake-Pope images.)

But there was another race this weekend that was more important.

The Australian election was supposed to be a photo finish. Guess again! As Australian media put it, it was a thumping win for the center-left Labor party. And how weird is this? Just like in Canada, the leader of Australia's Trumpy official opposition lost his parliamentary seat — which he's held for 24 years. Peter Dutton, welcome to the PP Club.

So, add another Western ally to the countries that have rejected Donald and Donaldism: France, Germany, Canada, Mexico, the UK, and now Australia have all definitively rejected the MAGA-ization of their politics — and recommitted themselves to coalition building in defense of democracy around the world. We cats salute them, and we PURR.

P.S. Did you know that Australia has a Katter party? We didn't, either! We cats PURR again.

(IMAGE: Just a cat and a kangaroo, chillin'.)

Wir Sagen STFU, Baby Marco

By Hubie and Bertie

Of all the craven Trumpsters who have turned coat and gone over to the dark side — and yes, we're including Elise "Elsie" Stefanik in this group — the most reprehensible may be Baby Marco Rubio. Was T.S. Eliot thinking of him when he wrote "We are hollow men"? Baby Marco has sold what little soul he ever had to Benedict Donald, and the effects, as we've all seen, are aging him in real time.

Politicos and pundits are said to be doubly shocked, because they once considered Rubio to have character and principles. We cats are happy to say that we never once thought that he did. We'd love to say "We told you so" now that Marco — whose family fled either Batista or Fidel (both dictators, so take your pick) — has turned on his fellow immigrants and now supports shipping them off to third-country prisons. Despicable. Revolting. Turn-your-back-on-him-if-you-meet-him-in-public-level stuff.

However, on the good news side, Baby Marco got the smackdown of his life today — from none other than the German government.

What set Marco off was the German domestic intelligence agency's designation of the far-right Alternative for Germany, or AfD, as a bunch of extremists. Which they are. But Rubio is just beside himself to think that this means Elon Musk's favorite political party in Deutschland might be subjected to increased governmental surveillance. (You know, like we Americans were doing to terrorist groups after 9/11.)

"Germany just gave its spy agency new powers to surveil the opposition," Rubio bleated on social media. "That's not democracy — it's tyranny in disguise." Hah! He — or his State Department minions — must have felt really good when they hit the "publish" button on that one.

But the German Foreign Office wasted no time in posting back:

"This is democracy," they said, for all the world to see. "The decision is the result of a thorough and independent investigation to protect our constitution and the rule of law. It is independent courts that will have the final say. We have learned from our history that right-wing extremism needs to be stopped."

Wow. We have learned from our history that right-wing extremism needs to be stopped. It's a new world, Marco — one in which you're getting embarrassing lessons from the Germans — and wilkommen, bienvenue, welcome to it. We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

The Mirror And The Blight

By Miss Kubelik

Today is no ordinary International Workers' Day — the nation is in a state of emergency. That's why thousands marched in anti-Trump protests across the country today — the sixth major day of demonstrations since early February, and with many more no doubt to come. (For information on the movement and upcoming protests, click here.)

The first 100 days of Donald 2.0 have been so relentlessly dark that it's hard to imagine they will ever end. But our destiny lies in our hands. The midterms aren't until next November, but these elections will take place before then, with the Virginia and New Jersey Governor's races the key events. In the meantime, we can organize on the ground: registering voters, building networks, turning out at town halls, and fielding candidates at the local level, like for school boards, county commissions, and city councils.

In short, we're in it for the long haul, folks. Democracy will not be reclaimed overnight, but through the slog, it will be good to remember the words of Frederick Douglass: "The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress." We cats PURR.

(IMAGE: Michael de Adder, deadder.net)