La Neige Arrive

By Miss Kubelik

Last year about this time, we cats traveled to Wisconsin and got caught driving in a massive snowstorm. We probably used up at least two of our nine lives that night. Why? Because former Republican Governor Scott Walker, the cross-eyed college dropout, is an idiot.

Walker had just lost his bid for re-election and was on his way out the door come January. Maybe we're spoiled by the efficiency of snow clearing in New York State, but we drove from Chicago to the Green Bay area through the aforementioned storm and didn't see a single plow. We also couldn't really see the lane lines on the highway, so it was pretty scary. All Scott Walker's fault. Republicans don't believe in government, which means they don't believe in infrastructure, snow plows, salt trucks, or other things that improve people's safety and quality of life.

Tomorrow we're going to race home from Canada to beat "Winter Storm Ezekiel." Wish us luck — although we might not need it, since we'll be driving through a state with a Democratic Governor (which even Wisconsin has now). We cats PURR.

The Irishman

By Zamboni

It would have been great to have been at Washington's famous Irish pub, The Dubliner, Wednesday night — to see former Maryland Governor Martin O'Malley bitch-slap Homeland Security Trumpster Ken Cuccinelli.

Both went to Gonzaga College High School, whose alumni regularly gather at the pub on Thanksgiving Eve. (Who knew?) And as soon as O'Malley saw Cuccinelli walk in, he got in the Cootch's face.

The topic? Immigration and family separation, and shortly after the tongue-lashing began, Cuccinelli turned tail and ran. Later, O'Malley texted a reporter and accused Cuccinelli of being "the son of immigrant grandparents who cages children for a fascist President."

Gosh! We're in love. Where was this Martin O'Malley in 2016, instead of the fade-into-the-wallpaper guy who briefly ran for President that year? Somebody let us know, please. In the meantime, may Cuccinelli, Kirstjen Nielsen, Stephen Miller and their Trumpster ilk never, ever be able to walk into a pub, restaurant or any public space without being harassed out of it — for the rest of their lives. We cats PURR.

(PHOTO: Alex Wong/Getty Images. A Cuccinelli-eye view of Martin O'Malley the other night.)

And Now This...

A family photo that Michelle Obama just released on Twitter finally puts to rest a nagging question: Which Obama daughter is more beautiful? By this evidence — although they're both gorgeous — it's Sasha, hands down. We cats PURR.

Turkey Day Trivia

This is a good day to remember that the first Macy's parade balloon was not that annoying rodent from the Disney studio, but a cat. Here's Felix, from 1927. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! We cats PURR.

No Sancutary From Sensible Gun Laws

By Baxter

These folks have a lot of guts. They are the parents of Roanoke broadcast journalist Alison Parker, who was killed on live TV by a crazy gunman (who probably would have been disarmed before the crime had there been red-flag laws in place in Virginia). Andy and Barbara Parker showed up at a Henry County Board of Supervisors meeting to speak against "Second Amendment sanctuaries." As you can see, they (and their friend in purple) were surrounded.

The board refused to allow Mrs. Parker to speak until after they had unanimously voted to disobey any gun-control laws passed by Virginia's evil new Democratic government. Later, when the Parkers returned home, they received a bunch of threats.

Ya gotta love that gun-nut crowd. Do you think they heard that a few counties over, just outside of Richmond, some idiot caused a panic at a Walmart when he accidentally shot his weapon in a restroom? Second Amendment Land is no place to live.

We feel for Andy and Barbara Parker, who tomorrow will be spending their fifth Thanksgiving without their daughter. One consolation: Chris Hurst, Alison Parker's fiance, sits in the Virginia House of Delegates today, having defeated an NRA candidate to represent the 12th District. We think we know how he'll vote on any gun legislation coming down the pike. We cats PURR.

Russia's Attacking America. Where Are The Republicans?

By Sniffles

Republican Senator John Neely Doofus Kennedy just walked back a comment he'd made earlier on FOX "News," that nobody knows who hacked the DNC server in 2016, Russia or Ukraine. "I was wrong...it was Russia to tried to hack the DNC computer," he said.

It's not clear why Senator Doofus suddenly realized that the truth would set him free. But there's something super-weird going on with Republicans and Russia.

Why is the party of Ronald Reagan on Russia's side?

In case you're about to make the argument that they want to win the 2020 election and don't care if it has to be done with Vladimir Putin's help, think again. Russia is attacking far more than "just" our elections. Here's a case in point:

"Russian hackers are holding hostage data from a Milwaukee-based company that provides technology services to more than 100 nursing homes across the country after the company couldn't afford a $14 million ransom demand," The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel reports.

"The hack against Virtual Care Provider Inc., which provides internet security and data storage services to nursing homes and acute-care facilities, means that some locations cannot access patient records, use the internet, pay employees or order crucial medications....Some affected facilities could be forced out of business, and patients' health is at risk if the data is not accessible."

The hackers apparently screwed up, thinking that Virtual Care Provider was a big corporation that could easily fork over zillions. But in reality, the company is much smaller, and a ransom of that size is out of the question. So everybody's stuck. The crooks can't get their money, and the victims can't get their data.

We already know that Republicans don't care about Americans' health, thanks to their relentless attacks on the Affordable Care Act. But you'd think that they'd care about companies being attacked and jobs lost. Because that's what's happening here.

Will somebody please explain why so many Republicans are silent on Russia? Where is Senator Ron Johnson (R-Wisconsin) on this one? (Oh! Johnson spent a recent July 4 in Moscow, didn't he?) Where's the Wisconsin Congressional delegation? Why is the GOP standing silently by while Benedict Donald sells out America to Putin? We cats HISS.

Yes, Please Ask Our Opinion

By Hubie and Bertie

The media's obsession with the red-hat crowd is frustrating. It seems like every time we turn around, there's another "analysis" of Trump voters or maybe-could-be Trump voters or, at the very least, all those white, working-class dudes WHOSE OPINIONS WE ARE SICK OF. Thank you for allowing us to shout.

Why don't reporters ever interview us, we wonder? Okay, we're cats. But why aren't journalists captivated by suburbanites who hate Donald Trump and can't wait to vote his ass out of office? There are many, many more of those folks than the MAGA crowd. (Because as we know, Benedict Donald's road shows draw the same people, over and over — who end up drifting out early because, well, they know how it ends.)

Well, until reporters recognize that other people besides Trumpsters live in America, we'll content ourselves with this summary of the voting in Virginia this month. It has interesting portents for next year:

1. Turnout was up, with most of those extra folks voting Democratic.

2. Voters are realigning to the Democratic Party even if they don't agree with every policy in our platform, because they're so turned off by the nativism and the hate of the GOP.

3. Trump damaged Republican candidates who otherwise would have had a chance.

So, asked The Roanoke Times, "is this the 'new normal,' or will future elections revert to the lower turnout of the past?" Seems to us that if Benedict Donald is at the top of the ticket and in control of the GOP, there will be no such reversion in 2020. We cats PURR.

Tidbits And Cat Treats: Here's To The Committee

By Zamboni

With the stuff that's coming out about Lev Parnas setting up meetings for Devin Nunes in Ukraine to manufacture dirt on Joe Biden, no one should assume that the impeachment hearings are done. But at the end of an eventful two weeks, we cats have a few thoughts about how the Intelligence Committee has fared so far.

Chairman Adam Schiff has been perfect. Perfect. There's no other word for him. Not only has he controlled the committee with a steely Zen resolve, his closing statements have been the stuff of literature. They should be published in a book, from day the first to day the last. It's a book that we cats would gladly buy — because every day, Schiff laid out the Democrats' case, clearly and succinctly and memorably. The fact that he quoted Elijah Cummings at the end sent chills up our spines. Well done, sir.

Sean Patrick Maloney surprised us with his excellent questioning and his apology to Fiona Hill for Republican Mike Turner's "epic mansplaining." We're glad Maloney didn't become New York State Attorney General (and that Tish James did) so that he would still be a member of the House and present to say this.

Val Demings — whoa, we cats are pretty fearless, but we don't think we'd want to run into Val in a dark alley. The word to describe Demings is one that's quite popular now: badass.

Jackie Speier is wonderful. Not only did she get off that great line about Trump's five Pinocchios, did you know that she survived five gunshot wounds at Jonestown in 1978? (See "badass," above.)

We loved Raj Krishnamoorthi's real-life cringe emoji after a chit-chat with our ridiculous Trumpster Congresswoman, Elise Stefanik. And we love that it went viral.

But Peter Welch probably had the best moment — and the fact that it came at the expense of the revolting Gym Jordan was doubly delicious. After Jordan bemoaned Republicans' inability to question the whistleblower ("the reason we're all sitting here," he groused), the Vermont Democrat had a ready answer. "I'd be glad to have the person who started it all come in and testify," he shot back. Benedict Donald, he said, "is welcome to take a seat right there." We cats PURR.

Fabulous, Formidable Fiona

By Miss Kubelik

Our first thoughts about Fiona Hill when we saw and heard her testimony today was that we're glad we don't work for her. It's not that we don't respect her brilliance. It's her refusal to suffer fools that scares us. Gosh, you'd have to be on your toes at the office, all day, every day.

No wonder the Republicans on the Intelligence Committee were racing for the litter box. (See that picture above? Bet she got that bandage on her hand from a knife fight.) Barely any of the GOP House members asked her questions — they just made speeches instead. It must have been wearying for her. She's more than earned an ice-cold, straight-up, olive-laden vodka martini tonight.

What's depressing is that the GOP members — our own Congresswoman among them, we're sorry to say — sat opposite this incredible woman and heard her speak the truth and still, still refused to be moved about the perfidy of Donald Trump. Exhibit "A" is Will Hurd, the lone African-American Republican Congressman who has announced his retirement and has nothing to lose. He said today that there was no there there on impeachment. Incredible.

They're being obstinate because 1) as noted, Fiona is scary, and 2) when you're deservedly called out for siding with Vladimir Putin, you have no choice but to dig your heels in the ever-shifting sands.

And the sands are indeed shifting. Anything can happen these next few weeks. But at this point Republicans should brace themselves for losing the Senate, the Presidency, and at least five more seats in the House in 2020. The elections in Virginia, Kentucky and Louisiana, and the recent outpouring of disgust with our newly Trumpy Congresswoman Stefanik have us edging closer to that prediction.

Oh, and having been destroyed, the GOP will then split into two parties: the Whigs and the Know-Nothings. You heard it here first. We cats HISS.

The Best Brains

By Baxter

The interwebs are abuzz with Benedict Donald's halting descent down the airplane steps in Texas this afternoon. Frankly, we've watched it a couple of times and we're not really seeing it. After all, nobody can negotiate steps (and shelves, and sills, and barn rafters) like us cats.

But this Sharpie-scrawled thing that Trump clutched in his tiny orange hand before boarding Marine One? This is odd.

Because you can't believe this White House about anything, statements they've made about Trump's visit to Walter Reed this past weekend are highly suspect. So tweeps and others are filling in the gaps with observation and speculation. First, it was stents. Now, thanks to this VERY BIG-LETTERED NOTE PAD, Trump's baby steps from the plane in Austin, and his lexical inadequacies — which seem to be getting worse — the word is stroke. Or TIA. Something neurological.

In recent years, Benedict Donald has declined to a sixth-grade or lower verbal level. The world has noted his deterioration for some time. But why would he need notes like this? They're simple thoughts and words.

Well, if the Russian-Asset-in-Chief is going gaga, that could be good news for Gordon Sondland. Maybe Trump will forget to fire him. We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

Grisham, Gross

By Sniffles

Why are American taxpayers footing the bill for Stephanie Grisham's salary? She does nothing, not even White House press briefings. Note to Steph: Gurl, you need to give back every penny you haven't earned, before we come to get it from you.

When Grisham does deign to do her job, she lies. We're all still wondering whether we can trust her statements on Benedict Donald's sudden trip to Walter Reed this weekend. (Spoiler: We can't.) In the meantime — maybe to deflect attention? — she's made up a ridiculous story about outgoing Obama staffers leaving hate notes for Trumpsters to find. In every office, she said.

Republicans have tried this crap before. Remember the lies the Bush 43 people told about missing computer keys and other alleged pranks by the departing Clinton folks in January 2001? Total fiction. And now, Grisham has had to walk her accusations back.

Grisham deserves tp join Stephen Miller, Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Kirstjen Nielsen in the Can't-Eat-In-Public-Restaurants Club — although it's a pretty cushy punishment when you consider that Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman and his family may have to be moved to a military base for their safety. We cats HISS.

(IMAGE: Mug shots of Stephanie Grisham after her drunk driving arrests in 2013 and 2015.)

Fourteen Points

By Hubie and Bertie

Well, it's official: Congresswoman Elise Stefanik's silly gamesmanship at Friday's impeachment hearing has changed the political landscape right outside our front door.

"The sudden attention given to the race in New York's 21st Congressional District demonstrates how the nation's partisan divide can invigorate a little-noticed upstate outpost — covering a massive chunk of Adirondack forests and towns known as the North County — and turn it into a major electoral battleground," The New York Times reports.

The Times also reminds readers that our 2020 Democratic candidate, Tedra Cobb, lost to Stefanik by a hefty margin in 2018: 14 points. But we cats would argue that Tedra does not have to make up that much ground between her and the now-full-on-Trumpy Elise next year.

Those 14 points are not a monolith. Think of them in terms of these voters: There's Benedict Donald's base, made up of older white males with unhealthy lifestyles (and guns in the house), a lot of whom could be dead by next November. There are new residents who are moving here for cheaper real estate than they can find in the lower Hudson Valley, and who never knew Elise as the "moderate problem-solver" she always pretended to be. And finally, there are the independent and/or suburban voters, appalled and repulsed by Stefanik's embrace of Trump, who will vote against her just for that. (See: Louisiana, Kentucky.)

Things change awfully fast for this hapless, cowardly party known as the GOP, don't they? As of tonight, Elise Stefanik's got a race on her hands. Who'd have thought it? We cats PURR.

(IMAGE: Tedra's smiling a lot these last few days.)

Elise Stefanik Starts To Realize That Maybe She's Done The Wrong Thing

By Miss Kubelik

Well, that's probably not what was on Elise Stefanik's mind at this point in Friday's impeachment hearing. Because this picture is from before Twitter (and the whole world) decided that Elise is a horrible person who needs to be booted from Congress next year.

Wonder what she's thinking now? Donations to her Democratic opponent Tedra Cobb have crossed the $1 million mark— in just 48 hours. Never underestimate the hatred of Trump and his enablers, of which our Congresswoman is suddenly one.

We have no idea what has prompted Elise to join Team Deplorable. She was always content to skate along on an undeserved "moderate" reputation. It was irritating to us Democrats who saw through it, but it was generally effective. Now, after her (in the words of George Conway) "trashy" stunt at the hearing and her subsequent Trumpy tweets, she could be a face on Mount Rushmore with Miss Gulch, Nurse Ratched and Cruella de Vil.

There's probably no going back for Elise. Trump has sealed the deal by tweeting favorably about her, so she's stuck doing more of the same this week. No doubt, however, that whatever antics she and her repulsive buddies Devin Nunes and Gym Jordan have up their sleeves, Adam Schiff will be ready. And Tedra Cobb will keep raising money. We cats PURR.

This Picture Is Probably Fake. But Tedra's Online Cash Haul Isn't.

By Zamboni

Adam Schiff received a hero's welcome (and standing ovation) at the California Democratic Convention in Long Beach today. Elise Stefanik has been tweeting angrily at George Conway.

Who's having the better day?

Maybe we should have seen this coming after Elise's histrionics at Friday's impeachment hearing. Particularly since we took two minutes in the middle of the afternoon to urge fellow tweeters to donate to Tedra Cobb, our Democratic candidate here in New York's 21st Congressional District. Our Twitter account promptly sagged under the weight of likes and notifications.

But that was just a tiny sliver of the Interwebs' throwdown of Elise Stefanik, which still shows no signs of slowing down. In 24 hours, Tedra Cobb has racked up $535,473 in 21,900 contributions, one of which was $2,800 — the legal maximum — from Conway. Yes, Kellyanne's husband. That so unnerved Elise that she got in a Twitter fight with him, misspelling "misogynist" along the way. (Didn't she go to Harvard?)

How many House challengers in 2018 raised half a million dollars in a day? Is the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee taking note? We sure hope so. Elise, for her part, is begging for money off this as well, going after Schiff and the "socialist Democrats" and making an even bigger fool of herself. Meanwhile, Tedra is challenging Twitter to get her past $1 million before the weekend's out. If you'd like to donate, click here. We cats PURR.

(IMAGE: As we said, this photo can't be real. The woman in this picture looks too thin to be Elise.)

UPDATE, 11:45 PM: Tedra Cobb has raised $650,000 and has set a goal of $1 million before the end of the weekend. We'll keep tabs (and maybe shoot a few more bucks her way).

UPDATE #2, Sunday, 4:40 PM: Tedra Cobb is $100,000 away from her target of $1 million. We cats just kicked in another contribution. You can, too. Click!

UPDATE #3, Sunday, 7:30 PM. Tedra has hit $975,000. We think she's going to do this.

Inherit The Trump

By Baxter

At the end of one of our favorite plays, Inherit the Wind — about the Scopes trial in 1926 — the teacher who taught evolution in his classroom has been convicted, but only with a token fine. In the classic 1960 film of the play, the great actor Frederic March, as the Christian crusader Matthew Harrison Brady, rails at the godless evolutionists — while the radio folks (and the world) have moved on.

We cats thought about this as Republican Jim Jordan screamed at Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff at the end of today's impeachment hearing. Jordan was demanding time to respond to Schiff's closing statement, but Schiff — secure in his power as committee chairman — was having none of it. The Republicans were drowned out by a standing ovation, which the Democrats gave Yovanovich when she left the hearing room after adjournment.

The Republicans were left to disperse and reconvene for a desultory press scrum, in which they continued to complain about process, and addressed none of the substance of the ambassador's testimony. But it was whimpering compared to the crashing and burning of Trump.

If Benedict Donald had been present in the hearing room, his blustering would have been ignored and dismissed by the vagaries of the crowd. We cats love this, and we PURR.

Article II, Section 4

By Sniffles

"Kids! Don't try this at home!" We cats of a certain age remember that admonishment from our kittenhoods — a warning to us youngsters not to attempt the daring feats that our TV heroes performed unscathed.

It looks like someone should have said that to Benedict Donald's merry band of haters and traitors. Because not only are they selfish, grifting and malevolent, they're clueless.

Exhibit "A" is Gordon Sondland, a hotel manager from Oregon who got his important job — Ambassador to the European Union — thanks to a $1 million donation to Trump's inaugural boondoggle. Clearly a sign of the low regard in which Benedict Donald holds the EU.

But as it turns out, Sondland's appointment was fateful. Because he oddly became the bag boy for the Ukrainian shakedown (Ukraine is not even an EU member), and since he's been caught in almost-perjury before Congress, he could strike a crippling blow to Trump's nightmare Presidency when he testifies to the House next week.

He already has, in fact — by placing an unsecured cellphone call to Trump from a restaurant in Kyiv, with everyone at the table (and surely Vladimir Putin) able to listen in. Sondland was stupid enough to do that, and stupid enough to tell aides, "Trump cares more about the Bidens than Ukraine." And Trump, of course, was stupid enough to take Sondland's call (and talk very loudly on it as well).

Contrast all this lunacy with the Speaker of House and her Democrats, who so far have handled the impeachment with precision and smarts. We've already commented on Nancy Pelosi's masterful performance. Today, we saw more: With no hearings until tomorrow, the Speaker stepped up to the lectern for a press conference (something the White House "press secretary" never does), threw delicious shade at Trump, and purposely — very purposely — used the word "bribery."

'Cuz it's in the Constitution, ya'll. You could look it up. We cats PURR.

"Outlandish," Indeed

By Hubie and Bertie

On a day of momentous impeachment testimony from two sober and seasoned career diplomats, the Republicans just couldn't help themselves: They threw around a lot of nonsense, hoping that something, anything, would stick. Even our own Congresswoman helped kick things off with some snippy questions for Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff (who promptly shut her down).

But nothing since the Chairman gaveled today's hearing to a close has been more — shall we use Steve Castor's favorite word? — "outlandish" than Republicans on the other side of Capitol Hill secretly scheming to hold a long Senate trial so as to disrupt the campaigns of Democratic Senators running for President.

We cats have opined on that before, and our response was "So what?" By now, all Democratic candidates should have their organizations firmly entrenched, without having to rely solely on performances on the stump. And magic trial moments could be a tonic for Senators like Cory Booker and Kamala Harris, who despite their prodigious talents could probably use a little shot in the arm. (On the other hand, if you think a trial would cause Senate Democrats problems, you quickly realize that Republicans are afraid of one Senator in particular — Elizabeth Warren.)

But there's one candidate who doesn't have a day job and could campaign to his heart's content: Joe Biden. You know, the guy Benedict Donald was blackmailing Ukraine over? In the midst of a Senate trial, Biden would have the retail-politics arena practically to himself (which is a good thing, because he should be doing more of it). What an opportunity — even Pete Buttigieg would have to drag himself back to South Bend to earn his paycheck from time to time.

In short, as usual, the GOP is making no sense. We assume they'll only get more "outlandish" from here. We cats PURR.

Icing On The Cake, Cherry (Not) On Top

By Miss Kubelik

We cats weren't planning to blog about Don Cherry again, but now that the NFL has invited all 32 teams to a workout with Colin Kaepernick in Atlanta, we've changed our minds. Because the first thought that popped into our furry brains when we heard the Colin news was "Gosh! That's just the kind of thing that would make Don Cherry mad!"

Yes, his domain was hockey, not US football — but principled players of color, no matter the sport, were never Cherry's cup of tea. So here we are, typing away, while Cherry, having just lost his platform for hatemongering, has to stew in private.

And the True North will be better for it. We've run across the bleating tweets from a few disgruntled Canadian MAGA types, decrying the state of their country because an 85-year-old bigot got canned. Maybe they think Hockey Night in Canada is still owned by the CBC? It's the property of Rogers Sportsnet, a private corporation which is sensitive to what the market will bear and, therefore, can fire whom it pleases. (It's so funny how right wingers scream like scalded cats about free speech when the private sector, which they usually defend so ardently, accommodates customers who are offended by someone like Cherry.)

Meanwhile, we couldn't help noticing that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau allowed his Minister of Defense, a no-nonsense, badass-looking Sikh dude in a turban, to take the lead on the Twitter machine to educate folks on the many religious and ethnic minorities who have donned the uniform and fought for Canada. As you probably can guess, Don Cherry never has. Explains a lot, doesn't it?

Our ultimate conclusion? Cherry's outburst on Remembrance Day weekend was not so much about poppies as about the recent election. He just can't get over the fact that Trudeau is back in, even with a minority government. Times have changed, diversity is our strength, and Old Don is fit to be tied about it. 

As Cathal Kelly wrote so eloquently in The Globe and Mail, Cherry "had finally taken on something too big even for him — our collective values. He’d given the country the excuse it needed to move on from the past.

"In the end, bigotry didn’t take down Don Cherry. He’d always been a bigot. What got him in the end was Canada." We cats PURR.

"Against All Enemies, Foreign And Domestic"

An appropriate video for this Veterans' Day. Elaine Luria, who represents Norfolk and Virginia Beach in Congress, is a Navy vet who takes her oath of office seriously. Unlike some people we know. We cats PURR.

Poppycock

By Zamboni

Don'tcha just love it when public figures use the accusatory "You people"? Talk about outing yourself as a hater! We cats remember like it was yesterday Ann Romney declaring that the smidgen of tax returns she and Willard had released were all that "you people" were going to get.

Ann forgot that her and Willard's responsibility to be transparent was not to the press but to the American (not "you") people.

Now, across our northern border, the despicable sports commentator Don Cherry has done it again. On this weekend's Hockey Night in Canada, Cherry went after immigrants in Toronto and other parts of Ontario who, he says, don't wear the poppy on Remembrance Day. (Handy tip: Remembrance Day is Canadian for Veterans Day.)

"You people…you love our way of life, you love our milk and honey, at least you can pay a couple bucks for a poppy or something like that," Canada's most famous sartorial nightmare sputtered. We're sorry to say that co-host Ron MacLean sat next to Cherry and said nothing. But Sportsnet, the network on which HNIC now resides, apologized.

As well they should, since the interwebs have been exploding with photos posted by descendants of Canadians of color who fought in World Wars I and II. And with photos of Sikh guys in turbans also sporting — you guessed it — poppies. It is patently untrue that immigrants refuse to wear them. Cherry is an ass.

When will the world be done with these ancient, aggrieved white guys who can't stop themselves from flaunting their ignorance and bile? Whether it's Canada or the US, will we only get relief from the haters when they die? Cherry is 85. Trump's fans skew over 50, and even more strongly over 65. How long must we wait? We cats HISS.

UPDATE: Don Cherry has been fired. And there is much rejoicing.

Monica Crowley Ist Ein Idiot

On the 30th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall, tweeps are excoriating right-wing fool Monica Crowley for her four-year-old assertion that "walls work."

This is because folks we follow on Twitter are decent people — unlike the Trumpsters (and note that Crowley is now a member of the administration, which means we taxpayers foot the bill for her salary).

Perhaps the Malevolent Monica is too young to remember JFK's memorable "Ich Bin Ein Berliner" speech from 1963 — but surely she recalls Ronald Reagan's admonition "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall"? And maybe she doesn't care?

The Republican Party has gone so far off the nutcase deep end that even Reagan is spinning in his grave. We cats HISS.

Is The Bloomberg Already Off The Rose?

By Baxter

So, Michael Bloomberg: We cats get the feeling that there are lots of problems. Number one, we're not seeing a groundswell of support for him in our corner of the Twittersphere. Also, when he was in charge of New York, he was the "nanny-Mayor." Plus, he's short, Jewish, 77 years old, and a billionaire — as if we need more old white guys in the race.

On the other hand, let us consider the following.

Remember those giant sodas he crusaded against in New York? Each one is equal to 87 CUBES OF SUGAR. Tell us that's not bad for you.

A candidate with his money could skip all the early states — Iowa, New Hampshire, South Carolina and Nevada — and go right to Super Tuesday. Don't forget that unlike the GOP, the Democratic Party is actually conducting a primary. Bloomberg could wait to see how the field shook itself out, and then make his move.

Bloomberg would have to fall on his sword on stop-and-frisk if he would have any hope of attracting minority voters. But if he got the nomination and then chose Kamala Harris or Stacey Abrams as his running mate, he might be interestingly electable.

Bottom line? The most attractive thing about Michael Bloomberg is that he would drive Donald Trump crazy. Because unlike Benedict Donald, Bloomberg is a real billionaire. Get back to us with more information, Mike. In the meantime, we cats maybe, or maybe not, PURR.

"Senator John Kennedy, You're No John Kennedy"

By Sniffles

We cats recently had a chat with a nonpolitical acquaintance, who said that his co-workers have been pretty mean to each other lately. He gingerly wondered if politics was the reason.

He brought it up, not us. And of course, we emphatically agreed.

People are treating each other like sh*t? Trump's to blame. Even for folks who don't scarf up political news like Kitten Chow, or who don't give a moment's thought to who's President for weeks on end, Benedict Donald has been an intrusive, unwelcome, poisonous presence. His insulting, infantile behavior breaks through, forcing people to deal with it. It's wearying.

Surely that's one of the reasons support for impeachment skyrocketed so fast after the Ukraine news broke. If Trump hadn't been so awful for the last three years, voters would be much more willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. Americans are exhausted. Impeach and convict.

We're seeing it with other Trumpsters, too. Republican Senator John Neely Kennedy is feeling the heat today for calling Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi "dumb" at a Trump rally in Louisiana last night. You might think that a Senator who sees a doofus staring back at him every time he looks in the mirror might refrain from comments like that. "I didn't mean it as disrespectful at all," he bleated today. Hm.

There's some consolation in the fact that Kennedy is getting pushback on this. But in the meantime, you know that all the vitriol and disrespect is seeping down, down, down into people's hearts and minds. Ugh.

It's another grave misdeed that we must lay not just at the feet of Trump but of the whole Republican Party, which, for the sake of a tax cut for the One Percent and a slew of conservative judges, has refused to stand up for decency. Here's how former GOP Congressman David Jolly described his erstwhile Republican colleagues: "Spineless politicians, rotten to the core, without virtue, without any level of human integrity, devoid of self-respect, self-reflection, without courage and without the moral compass to recognize their own malevolence."

We cats couldn't agree more, and we HISS.

P.S. Headline credit goes to that brilliant tweeter, Preet Bharara.

This Says It All

If there's an image that sums up last night's election results, it's this one. Up yours, Benedict Donald! The cyclist pictured here, by the way, just won a seat Loudon County's Board of Supervisors. (Icing, meet cake: Trump's Sterling golf club happens to be in her district.) We cats PURR.

Beshear Madness

By Hubie and Bertie

Now that Kentucky has just elected a Democratic Governor (less than one day after Benedict Donald was there campaigning), we cats have a few thoughts.

Thanks for turning out the vote, Trump!

Don't mess with teachers' unions. Even in red states.

Even in Kentucky, people are tired of Donald Trump. Perhaps Rand Paul will regret not keeping his distance.

Everyone needs to send money to Amy McGrath in her Senate race against Mitch McConnell. RIGHT NOW. Goodness gracious, but McConnell must be having kittens tonight.

And finally, some earlier reporting (ominous for Benedict Donald) from Robert Costa of The Washington Post: "I spent the day the Senate, talking with Republicans. They are all paying close attention to the Kentucky gubernatorial race. They are not just watching the returns, but President Trump's political capital as they make decisions about how to handle impeachment and their own future."

We cats PURR.

Poll Cats

By Miss Kubelik

Ironic that the Republicans were so exercised over the Benghazi death of a US Ambassador — about whom they could not possibly have cared less, by the way — that they held billions of hearings behind closed doors about it, only opening those doors when they sat Hillary Clinton down for 11 hours of testimony on national TV.

But in reality, they're the ones who "kill" ambassadors. Just read Marie Yovanovitch's October 11 transcript and you'll see that when the Trumpsters unceremoniously yanked from her posting in Ukraine, she felt personally threatened and concerned for her safety. Wow.

More transcripts will be released tomorrow. Meanwhile, Pundit World is yapping about a set of New York Times/Siena College polls that show Benedict Donald as far from dead in six battleground states: Arizona, Florida, Michigan, North Carolina, Pennsylvania and Wisconsin. Everyone's a little shocked — how could the guy who's getting impeached, and who just got booed at the World Series and the UFC in one week be so competitive?

We have a few thoughts about that.

Except for Biden, voters don't really know much about the prospective Democrats yet. Also, these polls only look at six states. What about the ones Trump claims he can flip — Minnesota, Colorado, New Mexico, New Hampshire, Virginia? And what about polls in states like Georgia, Texas and Iowa, which are much closer than they were three years ago?

The Times/Siena folks should re-poll after more Ukraine-gate revelations come to light. (On that note, news flash: Lev Parnas, one of Giuliani's Keystone Kop conspirators, has decided to cooperate with impeachment investigators. Whoops!) In the meantime, we're focused on the fact that Trump's approval rating has never gone above 50 percent, that those who strongly disapprove of him far outweigh those who approve, and that he "won" in 2016 with fewer popular votes than Willard Mitt Romney got in 2012.

And then there's the aforementioned Virginia. Let's see what happens there tomorrow, and then we'll revisit whether Benedict Donald will be able to flip it next year. We cats say, fat chance. And we PURR.

(IMAGE: These are actual polecats. Cute, aren't they?)

What A Difference A "D" Makes

By Zamboni

Democrats are so close to majorities in the Virginia legislature. On Tuesday, if they flip just two seats in each house, they're in completely charge. ('Cuz last we checked, Ralph Northam and Justin Fairfax were still Governor and Lt. Governor. Funny how those things work.)

If that happens, Virginians could see tremendous improvements in their quality of life. With Democrats running the show, the people of the Old Dominion could get easier access to voting, better environmental protection, a higher minimum wage, more effective gun control, protections for LGBTQ citizens, and more. All the things that we believe in and that the GOP has blocked — for a ton of reasons, but mostly, we think, because Republicans just don't like anyone who isn't white, male, Christian (or pretending to be), straight (ditto) and rich.

Virginia's results will be the most interesting to follow Tuesday night. Sure, those gubernatorial races in Kentucky, Louisiana and Mississippi will be fascinating, too, but a Democratic wave in Virginia could be a harbinger of what's in store for the GOP and the hideous, democracy-destroying Trumpsters who hold the party hostage. One encouraging sign so far: The number of absentee ballots in Virginia has zoomed — more returned by the middle of last week than for the entire election in 2015.

The more people who exercise the franchise, the better Democrats do — which is why Republicans have tried so hard for so many years now to suppress the vote. They can't win unless they gerrymander, cheat or commit treason. We cats HISS and PURR at the same time.

Apologies Accepted

By Baxter

We cats are strolling down Memory Lane, thinking back to the time when the Democrats won back the House of Representatives and the punditheads of the world were worrying about Nancy Pelosi's age (among other things). Which Democrats would defect, and vote for someone else as Speaker, they wondered. So many minutes of on-air time were wasted on this question.

In the end, members like Jim Cooper, Elissa Slotkin, Kathleen Rice, Jared Golden, Abigail Spanberger and Conor Lamb declined to vote for Nancy — for a variety of reasons. Mostly, they were not aligned with a hardcore, anti-Pelosi faction. But we were willing to chastise them gently — which we must nevertheless do again tonight.

The Speaker of the House has handled the impeachment of Donald Trump masterfully. Most of all, she knows her caucus. She knows not just the numbers in which they will vote, but their personal stories as well, and how those stories compare with their districts. Her goal, as always, is to preserve her majority. She is, in short, detail-oriented and brilliant. We challenge the Republicans to put forth one of their ranks who dares to compare. (We think there are none who will.)

Even so, as we roll into this decisive week, it would be nice if the previously anti-Pelosi Democrats would take a moment to step up and say: Madam Speaker, we were wrong, and you are fabulous. It would give the Democratic majority a wonderful backstop, and it would make us cats PURR.

Hill Heads For The Hills (But Not For Long)

Democrats aren't known for defiance, but it was the guts of Katie Hill's farewell speech on the House floor this week. We're sorry she's gone, but this video convinces us she'll be back. We cats PURR.