Friday, May 30, 2008

Pfleger is a Footnote, but...

By Zamboni

We have never paid any attention to comments by a Catholic priest. Not just because we're not Catholic, but because the credibility of the church — between their sex-abuse scandals and their excommunication of anyone who dares to ordain a woman — is pretty darn low.

Therefore, we couldn't care less what someone named Michael Pfleger has to say. But we're still really annoyed that he had to qualify his "apology" by saying, "I'm really sorry IF Senator Clinton found my remarks offensive...."

We dump our dirty litter box in Pfleger's bed. He's an idiot. But Senator Obama should apologize to all of us for this.

This Lights Our Fire

By Sniffles

We gatos say: What a great way to start the weekend. Watch this video:

We understand enough Spanish to tell you that one of the messages in this video is, "Obama is an end to the war in Iraq."

Latinos — and all of us — stand up! Nicely done.

Sometimes, the Blind Man Has the Vision

By Baxter

Under the heading of Things You Might as Well Get Used to Because They're Eventually Gonna Happen, we're feeling very warm and fuzzy toward New York Governor David Paterson today.

The governor — who came to power thanks to his predecessor's insatiable desire for prostitutes (how strange are the ways of men) — recently directed New York's governmental agencies to revise their regulations to recognize same-sex marriages performed in other states.

We cats don't bother much with marriage. We mate with whomever we please (unless The Cat Network gets us first). But we're pleased that Governor Paterson has done this, and that he has been such a good friend of the gay and lesbian community. After all, as a minority himself, he understands what gays are up against. "I’ve wanted to be someone in the African-American community who recognizes the new civil rights struggle that is being undertaken by gay and lesbian and transgendered people," he told The New York Times.

And even though we believe that gay marriage will become a reality in the U.S. in our lifetimes — after all, we have nine of them — we understand and appreciate that change requires people to take enormous risks in the beginning.

We PURR in the direction of Governor Paterson. And, since he can't see us very well, we jump up on his lap and knead him, too.

Memo to Bob Dole: Look in the Mirror

By Zamboni

Entire libraries have been written about feline behavior, we know. But some days we're hard-pressed to understand why humans — especially Republicans — do the things they do.

Today's example: Bob Dole. The former Senator and wildly unsuccessful 1996 GOP Presidential candidate has sent a blistering e-mail to Scott McClellan, taking him to task for writing What Happened and calling him a "miserable creature" for turning on the Bush Administration.

Now, we cats have a couple of reactions to this.

First, we note that, like the other members of the GOP attack machine, former Senator Dole doesn't even try to refute the substance of what Mr. Pudgy says in his memoir. Instead, he just goes after him personally.

But second, unless the former Senator is staging some fiendishly clever, red-herring attack to help Mr. McClellan sell books, we find the e-mail to be over-the-top virulent. So over the top, that at first we doubted its authenticity. Mr. Dole is one angry man, and we're wondering why.

Is it because after so many plastic surgeries, Mr. Dole no longer has a face? Take a look at this photo on CNN's website. We've seen Sphynx ponems that aren't stretched as tightly as this.

Or is it because he's worried about wife Liddy's North Carolina Senate seat? Could be. With only a few million dollars in the bank, Mrs. D. already has had to go on the air with commercials for her re-election — because her Democratic opponent, State Senator Kay Hagan, is neck and neck with her in the polls. In fact, the polls are so even that two weeks ago, the Lidster made Chris Cillizza's list of endangered Senate seats for the first time. We're guessing that the immense African-American turnout for Senator Obama in the North Carolina Presidential primary, plus his appeal to young voters in the state, have made the Doles awfully nervous.

And when you're expecting "cat"astrophe in the fall, you tend to get a little cranky.

But — "miserable creature"? It would have been nice if former Senator Dole had been more outraged about what Mr. McClellan wrote rather than the fact that he wrote it. In other words, why is this World War II vet more worried about the Bushies being outed on the Iraq war than he is about the 4,000-plus soldiers who have died — or the thousands who have been maimed — or the thousands more who are trying to kill themselves?

We HISS at former Senator Dole for not realizing who the "miserable creature" truly is.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

The Fat Man Sings

By Sniffles

Despite what Howard Kurtz says in The Washington Post today, we cats are not "hailing" former White House press secretary (and new author) Scott McClellan for his "belated truth telling."

We didn't like Mr. McClellan when he was working for Bush, and we don't like him now. (Although of course we're mightily enjoying this raging Republican cat fight, and we realize we have him to thank for it.)

It's just terribly dispiriting to read that "McClellan had deep qualms about Bush using propaganda to sell the Iraq war, about being misled on Valerie Plame, about the president being in denial on Hurricane Katrina," as Mr. Kurtz reports.

The destruction of a fine CIA officer's career was a disgraceful act of treason. But at least Ms. Plame and her husband, Joseph Wilson, are alive to tell the tale. The Iraq war and Katrina, on the other hand, have killed thousands — and their tolls are still mounting.

Now, we understand that Mr. Pudgy was just a White House communicator and not a policymaker. But when you think about all the people who have died since he first allegedly had his "qualms," we really don't feel like purring in his direction.

In fact, if it weren't for the fact that Mr. McClellan has managed to knock John McCain off message — and out of the headlines — for another week, we'd feel like GROWLING.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

"Mr. Speaker, I Insist on the Right to Ask Legitimate Questions"

By Baxter

Wow — now we know why "Seinfeld's" Kramer liked to videotape the Canadian Parliament. Here are excerpts from the House of Commons' Question & Answer period back on May 8:

Liberal MPs repeatedly ask whether Maxime Bernier, then the Foreign Affairs Minister for Stephen Harper's Conservative government, could assure them that his former girlfriend, Julie Couillard, had never posed a national security risk — by, for example, having unauthorized access to sensitive information. Outraged Conservatives consistently make fun of them and, at one point, shout them down.

Now, of course — thanks to her Monday night T.V. interview — we all know that indeed Madame Couillard was given unauthorized access to sensitive, national-security-related information. Monsieur Bernier left NATO documents at her Montreal apartment and promptly forgot about them for five full weeks.

We're not sure they've done so, but we sure hope that all those indignant Tories have apologized to every Liberal whom they ridiculed and insulted three weeks ago — especially that valiant MP from Saskatchewan who insisted on being heard. We PURR in that gentleman's direction for his determination in the face of an unruly Tory mob.

And we also think that Prime Minister Harper — who's been (forgive the expression) "dogged" with questions on the Bernier scandal on his current European trip — needs to beg the forgiveness of the Liberal and Bloc Quebecois leaders whom he called gossiping busybodies. But don't hold your breath.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

A Tory Pretty Boy Who Didn't Know What the F--- He Was Doing

By Zamboni

We are posting twice in a row because — as cats concerned with Canadian conundrums — we are in Full Scandal Mode.

Maxime Bernier — the Quebec political hack whom Tory Prime Minister Stephen Harper put in the all-important role of Minister of Foreign Affairs — has resigned because he left classified, NATO-related documents at an ex-girlfriend's apartment in Montreal. Oh, and should we mention that the girlfriend has previous connections to organized crime, courtesy of the Hell's Angels? (We won't even get into why it took Minister Bernier five weeks to remember that he'd misplaced that all-important, national-security-related file. Or why his loving, security-cleared, Bush-meeting girlfriend discussed with her lawyer what she should do with the file before she returned it to her beloved.)

Mind you, all this only came to light because the said ex-girlfriend, Julie Couillard, gave an in-depth interview to Canadian T.V. It wasn't revealed because Monsieur Bernier came clean on his own.

And mind you, this resignation only comes after a breathtaking series of what the media are politely describing as "gaffes" — Bernier not knowing the name of the president of Haiti (never mind that the current Governor General is of Haitian descent), Bernier embarrassing Afghan president Hamad Karzai by calling for a provincial governor's resignation, et cetera. et cetera.

But hold onto your hats. This resignation comes amidst Madame Couillard's claims that her bedroom — heck, her very bed — has been bugged. The buggers are not yet identified.

We cats are kind of the suspicious sort. We wonder if the Harper government — having placed a political goofball in a highly sensitive job (gee, how Rovian of them) — actually had second thoughts about their pretty boy and decided to bug his girlfriend's bed to get the goods on him.

We're also wondering if Stephane Dion and the Liberals are, right this very moment, dusting off their election plans. We think they might want to, because we don't believe for a minute that this story is over. In fact, we're thinking that it's only just begun.

We PURR in the direction of Julie Couillard, whose sense of injustice at the hands of her incompetent Tory boyfriend is obviously as massive as her — well, her measurements. (Check out the photo of her at Bernier's swearing in in August 2007 if you don't believe us.)

And we GROWL at Stephen Harper and his Bush clones, for politicizing his State Department as perniciously as Bush/Cheney/Rove/Gonzales politicized the U.S. Justice Department. You all are disgusting, and you deserve to be arrested for crimes against humanity.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Hillary (Almost) Does a Huckabee

By Zamboni

Even up here in Canada, we felines have heard about Senator Clinton's verbal equivalent of missing the litter box.

It made us want to roll our eyes — and we're not sure if, with three eyelids, we can. But at least, she was making an awkward historical reference and not a joke.

Governor Huckabee's NRA convention "josh" about an assassination attempt on Senator Obama could very well be dangerous. We hope that the Obama campaign, which was silent on the Huckabee outrage but has jumped all over Senator Clinton for her gaffe, appreciates that.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

In The True North, Strong and Free

By Sniffles

We are in Canada, relaxing over the U.S. Memorial Day weekend — the last under a Republican Administration for a long time, we hope. We'll probably be posting over the next few days, but we did want to take this opportunity to wish everyone an enjoyable holiday. Please take a moment to remember 4,000 guys and gals killed in Iraq. But for George W. Bush and Dick Cheney, they'd be enjoying their lives and families right now.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Michelle and Hillary, BFFs

By Baxter

We appreciate Senator Obama's comments on "Good Morning, America" today. Discussing the latest anti-Michelle Obama campaign ad by the Tennessee Republican Party, he warned the GOP to "lay off my wife."

But, alas. We are completely familiar with the substance (or lack thereof) of political catfights. And while we think that it's good that Senator Obama put the despicable, Rove-inspired Republican attack machine on notice, we harbor no illusions that they'll cease and desist.

So we have a suggestion for Mrs. Obama: Have a chat with Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Senator Clinton is uniquely qualified to advise you on how to withstand the anti-American, below-the-belt tactics that the Republicans were so good at in the 90s — and to which they're resorting in desperation today. In fact, she can help you not only withstand them, but transcend them.

Naturally, we hope that Senator Clinton will be your husband's running mate. But at the very least, she should be your New Best Friend.

Just Another Fine Example of that Excellent Republican "Brand"

By Zamboni

We're rubbing our paws together in quiet feline glee that Representative Vito Fossella of Staten Island is thinking of running for his seat in Congress after all.

A few weeks back, Fossella, a married-with-children "family values" Republican, was arrested for drunk driving in suburban Virginia. Then, he had to confess to having a — shall we say? — "alternate" family when the mother of his illegitimate daughter showed up to bail him out of the hoosegow.

We can think of nothing better than an already embattled Republican Congressional Campaign Committee having to spend money it doesn't have to defend a deeply flawed candidate in a what should otherwise be a safe GOP district.

We PURR in the direction of the pathetic Mr. Fossella, for giving RCCC chair Tom Cole and House Minority Leader John Boehner more reasons to reach for the Alka-Seltzer.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Mike Huckabee is an Asshole, Part II.

By Sniffles

Here's the video we promised you. What a little, little, little man.

Mike Huckabee is an Asshole.

By Baxter

We spent our Friday at the vet — getting blood work and some X-rays done — so we had no clue what was happening in the news. But when we came home and finally turned on the T.V., we were appalled to see what Mike Huckabee said when he addressed the NRA today.

A noise interrupted Huckabee's speech, and this so-called "nice" Republican candidate — the guy who has the great sense of humor, and compassion for folks, and what-not — said that the noise must have been Barack Obama, diving for cover because someone was aiming a gun at him.

We look forward to sharing the video with you. For now, we can only share our outrage.

We not only GROWL in Rev. Huckabee's direction — we wrestle him to the ground and rub his stupid face in our dirty litter box.

Chris Matthews Redeems Himself

By Sniffles

Chris Matthews usually doesn't get anything from us felines but wary stares. But his performance on last night's "Hardball" makes us willing to contemplate a purr or two.

The topic: Bush's speech to the Israeli Knesset and his "appeasement" shot at Senator Obama. The guests: right-wing radio asshole Kevin James and Air America's Mark Green. Watch the video and see what a difference it makes when cable TV hosts like the guy the Democrats are about to nominate. Matthews is mad as hell on Senator Obama's behalf and he just eviscerates James for spewing mindless GOP talking points.

A few things to keep your ears pricked for:

Matthews asks James, "Why are you screaming?" and James answers, "You excite me." Hm.

Count the number of times Matthews asks James what Neville Chamberlain did that was wrong, and the number of times James answers, "It was appeasement!" before Matthews finally gives up and says, "You don't know, do you?"

The expression on Mark Green's face throughout. Talk about the cat that ate the canary.

The Color Purple

By Zamboni

Between multiple catnaps and a few minutes' joy with a Kitty Tease, our attention has been grabbed by two completely unrelated stories today.

One is this New York Times piece on whether a surge in voter turnout by African Americans — anticipating Senator Obama as the Democratic nominee — will endanger the Republicans' hold on their usually solid South.

The other is yesterday's decision by the California state Supreme Court to legalize gay marriage.

Why connect the two? It's a matter of color — purple, actually.

Larry Sabato, director of the University of Virginia's Center for Politics, got it all started with this comment to The Times. "This [African-American turnout] is going to encourage the purple-ization of red states," he said. "It's going to make red states purple-ish over time."

Hmmm, we thought. Purple — the color you get when you combine red and blue. And, coincidentally, the color that right-wing evangelist Jerry Falwell said was associated with gay people. (Back in 1999, the late, unlamented Mr. Falwell accused the Teletubby Tinky-Wink of promoting the homosexual agenda, partly because he was, well, purple.)

And you know what? In light of recent events, maybe purple is the best color to be. It all came together in our minds when we heard San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom speak to a crowd of supporters on the gay marriage decision and say, "As California goes, so goes the nation."

Here in feline world — where we're weary of humans getting into cat fights over such self-evident issues as equality — we can only hope that the United States is heading toward becoming a More Purple Union.

One in which everyone is treated equally, despite whom they sleep with.

One served by a President who is a living, breathing example of the opportunity that only America can offer.

And one in which there's far less division between the Red and the Blue.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Too Bad Keith Could Only Say "Hell" on TV

By Baxter

We cats have not watched a whole lot of Keith Olbermann recently. We've been a little turned off by his attitude toward Senator Clinton, which seems to border on misogyny. But no matter. This post is about something different: George W. Bush's utter lack of understanding (and feeling) about the Iraq war and what it has done to this country and its people.

Last night on "Countdown," Mr. Olbermann went after Bush for that very sin in one of his all-time best Special Comments. Here are the last couple of minutes of it:

We PURR loudly at Keith Olbermann and rub our faces on his ankles. He says everything that needs to be said about the Worst Presidency Ever.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Somebody Please Explain This to Us.

By Sniffles

We cats are confused. This doesn't happen often, but when it does — well, it just does.

New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd and several other journalists reported an incident that occurred as Senator Obama was campaigning in the run-up to the recent Indiana primary.

"In a restaurant in Greenwood... Obama approached an older white guy who waved him off, muttering afterwards to a reporter: 'I can’t stand him. He’s a Muslim. He’s not even pro-American as far as I’m concerned.'”

Okay, now, we admit right out of the (litter) box that we cats aren't much into religion — unless of course it's US who are being worshiped. In short, if you ask us, we'll tell you that the Ancient Egyptians had the right idea.

Otherwise, we firmly believe in the Jeffersonian model of separation of church and state. Religion has no place in the public arena.

But despite all that, we just have to wonder where this "older white guy" in Greenwood, Indiana has been the last, oh, two months or so. How in the world did he miss all the brouhaha about Senator Obama's pastor, the Rev. Jeremiah Wright?

That's Senator Obama's pastor they were talking about — not his imam. Hel-LO???

Let us be clear. We couldn't care less whether Senator Obama is a Christian, Jew, Muslim, Hindu or pagan. We just don't understand why he must answer for the silly rantings of a guy whose church he went to AND have to respond to accusations that he's a Muslim — all at the same time.

We GROWL and switch our tails at voters who are so painfully uninformed. Please educate yourselves before November. The future of the planet is at stake.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Three Strikes and You're Out

By Zamboni

Cats with names like "Zamboni" usually comment on Canadian rather than American politics, but we have to admit that the races "south of the border" sure are exciting these days.

In fact, tonight we're celebrating the Republican Party's third consecutive defeat in a special Congressional election, and in a very red state. Congratulations, Travis Childers!

We have two thoughts.

First, as we all know that losing three safe seats in a row like this typically presages disaster for the fall (remember 1974?), does this put Haley Barbour or Lindsay Graham in play as McCain's vice president — just to try and hold the South? Inquiring cats want to know.

Second, let's talk money. Congressman-elect Childers just forced the Republican Congressional Campaign Committee to spend $1 million in a losing effort. Since the RCCC will have to spend a minimum of $45 million on Congressional races this year — what with all their other problems, like retirements, scandals and the like — they've just wasted about 2 percent of their entire 2008 budget losing this safe seat to Travis Childers.

But that's not all. To try to win back the district in November, the Republicans will have to spend at least another half million dollars. We like that — because that's $500,000 that they won't be able to spend trying to defeat Democrats like Heath Shuler in North Carolina, Tim Mahoney in Florida, or Brad Ellsworth in Indiana.

We PURR loudly in the direction of Travis Childers, and of all those fine voters of Mississippi's first Congressional district who refused to be swayed by icky, negative campaigning.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Why It Had to Be Crawford

By Baxter

It's a no-brainer. Here's the real reason that Jenna Bush had to get married in dusty, remote Crawford, Texas.

A country that's this pissed off at its President, his bottomless-pit war and his $4-a-gallon gas would have little patience right now for White-House-wedding hoopla. And we imagine that Barbara Bush is simply fit to be tied that little Jenna couldn't enjoy what those bitchy Nixon and Johnson girls had.

We have some advice for George W. Bush if he wants to improve his numbers: bring the troops home from Iraq, do something about gasoline prices — and oh, get a blow job from a White House intern.


Sunday, May 11, 2008

Is Vito Finito?

By Sniffles

We're sure that Congressman Vito Fossella is having just a wonderful Mother's Day.

Or at least a busy one — since, as the world just discovered due to his drunk-driving arrest, he has two mothers of his children in his life.

Apparently he's spending the day with his "official" family in Staten Island, which he serves — for the moment — as New York City's only Republican House member.

That leaves us cats wondering, and we must confess not very sympathetically, how the mother of the righteous Congressman's illegitimate three-year-old daughter is passing the time. Brunch at The Willard? Or secluded in her suburban Virginia home, trying to escape from the press?

Well, no matter. Whichever family Mr. Fossella is hiding out with, the hours must be hanging heavy as he tries to decide whether or not to stay in Congress since his hometown paper, The Staten Island Advance, called on him to resign. And since his party leader in the House, Representative John Boehner, effectively cut him loose before the weekend began.

Memo to (the real) Mrs. Fossella: Keep Vito away from the liquor cabinet, and hide the car keys.

In the meantime, although none of us cats is a mother (we've all been fixed), we're spending Mom's Day 2008 PURRing in contentment — as we always do when Republicans are exposed for the hypocrites they are.

Friday, May 9, 2008

This One-Trick Pony is Old Hat

By Zamboni

If you want more evidence that the obnoxious Diaz-Balart brothers will have to fight (for a change) for their South Florida Congressional seats this fall, look no further than this great TV spot by Joe Garcia, the Democratic candidate in the 25th district.

We so like the fact that he's included both of the brothers in this spot, even though he's only running against Mario. And we love his choice of musical artist. We're feelin' groovy.

A wildly happy PURR to Joe Garcia for making us grin like Cheshire cats today.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Family Values!

By Baxter

We don't understand why right-wing Republicans are so critical of gay people's lives when their own folks behave so badly.

Case in point: U.S. Representative Vito J. Fossella, Republican of Staten Island, who recently was not only arrested for drunk driving but who also has had to admit to an extramarital affairand an illegitimate daughter.

Memo to the Republican leadership: Why is this okay?

We liberal Democrats, gay and straight alike, just want to make our own way in life without infringing on other people's rights. So, why do you guys huff and puff about family values and attempt to desecrate the Constitution with discriminatory "marriage amendments" — when the guys on your side of the aisle are wantonly fornicating and, oh, by the way, endangering other people from behind the wheel?

Just wondering.

In the meantime, we HISS at Representative Fossella for his hypocritical silliness. (We also are breathlessly waiting for the Republicans in the House to promote him to some leadership position. Obviously, he's following in the footsteps of such fine, upstanding Americans as Newt Gingrich, Bob Livingston, and Bob Barr.)

Baba Wawa Who?

By Sniffles

The more we see journalists treated like celebrities, the more we're reminded of the wonderful movie, Broadcast News, in which TV news station manager Robert Prosky says to anchorman William Hurt — who has just expressed an opinion on the air — "Who cares what you think?"

The latest example is truly making us want to hack up a hairball. Frankly, my dears, we don't give a damn who Barbara Walters slept with. We don't care, we don't care, we don't care.

A low GROWL to anyone who tries to approach us to buy that silly book.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

It's Time for Obama-Clinton

By Zamboni

We cats haven't exactly been glued to the recent Democratic primaries, because we can't bear the blathering of the talking heads. And besides, nothing has been able to break the standoff between Senators Clinton and Obama.

Until now.

Senator Clinton's big loss in North Carolina yesterday — and the squeaker victory she eked out in Indiana — have convinced us that it's time. Senator Clinton, we like you very much, but you should drop out of the race.

We're not even going to criticize the way you handled your campaign. Plenty of people named Matthews and Olbermann and Cooper and Blitzer will do that for us, and anyway, you know how cats don't like to overextend themselves. We think you know what your mistakes were, and at the same time we recognize that you also acquitted yourself nobly in many ways. (New Hampshire comes to mind.)

So, please — sit down with your husband and your finance chairman and whatever other friends you really trust and figure out the best way to make a graceful exit.

But none of this means that Senator Obama is off the hook. We have a request for him, too.

Please choose Senator Clinton as your running mate. Do it now. She's demonstrated that she had incredible strength within the Democratic party, and come November, you'll need a fighter by your side and the voters she'll bring with her (like us). You also need a smart, experienced vice president to rely on when you win.

Obama-Clinton would not only be an unstoppable ticket. It would make us PURR, do some head rubs, knead, and show our stomachs.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

How Do You Say "Heckuva Job, Brownie" in Burmese?

By Baxter

Demonstrating a vivid underappreciation for irony, Laura Bush has criticized the military rulers of Myanmar for their "inept" response to Tropical Cyclone Nargis.

We'd HISS at Mrs. Bush, but we're laughing too hard.

Monday, May 5, 2008

Nanny Nanny, Boo Boo

By Sniffles

The GOP's mendacity machine wasted no time in trying to downplay the results of the special Congressional election in Louisiana this weekend.

What's that, you say? You were too busy watching fillies die at the Kentucky Derby (don't get us cats started on that) to pay attention to the latest example of the Republican party's cratering fortunes?

Well, no worries, we'll interrupt our latest catnap to bring you up to date: This Saturday, Democratic State Rep. Don Cazayoux took a Congressional seat that had been in the Republican column for more than 20 years. This is on the heels of the Democrats taking the Illinois House seat that had belonged to former Speaker of the House Dennis Hastert.

National Republican party officials tried to spin the oodles of money that they'd poured into the race — attempting to tie State Rep. Cazayoux to national Democratic figures such as Senator Barack Obama and Speaker Nancy Pelosi — as a successful effort to cut into State Rep. Cazayoux's lead.

Hel-LO? A Democratic lead, in a Republican stronghold near Baton Rouge? If that's the case, we can't wait until the upcoming Congressional runoff in Mississippi!

In the meantime, we PURR gently and happily in the direction of State Rep. Cazayoux, U.S. Rep. Chris Van Hollen and the entire Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee, for a job well done.

Friday, May 2, 2008

"It's the Fact that John McCain Doesn't Know Jack About the Economy, Stupid"

By Zamboni

As cats, we don't have to worry much about finances — mainly because we don't have thumbs. This means that we can't write checks or sign mortgage agreements. But we know humans who are struggling with economic issues — and it appears they'll be paramount come November.

A new CNN poll has 49 percent of respondents stating that the economy will determine how they will vote for President this fall. Why? Because energy costs and food prices are spiking — because people are having trouble paying their mortgages — because the cost of a college education is out of this world — because, because, because.

We'd just like to remind readers that John McCain recently said he didn't know a whole lot about economic stuff. "I know a lot less about economics than I do about military and foreign policy issues," he told The Wall Street Journal. "I still need to be educated." In subsequent interviews, he said that as President, he'd rely on his Secretary of the Treasury and his economic team to do good things and advise him well.

Puh-LEEZ. Is America going to vote for a Presidential candidate who doesn't have a clue how to get us out of this mess?

We HISS at John McCain. He's nothing more than a poseur. Cats just don't have the patience for anyone who's less than authentic.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Happy "Mission Accomplished" Day!

By Baxter

It was five years ago today that the worst person who ever lived landed on the aircraft carrier U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln — packin' a lotta lunch and baskin' in the adulation of his (manufactured) audience — and declared "Mission Accomplished" in Iraq.

We can think of no better way to commemorate this revolting anniversary than by sharing the following clip from Michael Moore's "Fahrenheit 9/11."

Back then, we'd only lost a few hundred soldiers in this war based on a pack of lies. Now, it's 4,000 and climbing. (And how are you going to vote this November? For more of the same, with McCain?)

We cats not only HISS at the Bush warmongers. Ears back, teeth bared, we jump on their faces and scratch their eyes out.