Thursday, April 30, 2009

Makes Sense to Us!

A new poll by the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life shows that churchgoers are more likely to favor torture.

Mitt, Unloved

By Zamboni

WaPo's Chris Cillizza recently posted a cliche-laden, poorly edited list of the "winners and losers" of President Obama's first 100 days.

We cats mention this not just to chide Mr. Cillizza for using tired old puns like "the son also rises" (referring to Andrew Cuomo), but to note that he listed former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney as a "winner." Romney, he says, "has done everything right in terms of positioning himself as the leading GOP contender against Obama in 2012."

Hmmm. We think that "The Fix" has not been spending a lot of time looking at right-wing websites. In fact, if he visits Free Republic today, he'll find a raging anti-Mittster conflagration, just blazing away.

The fire was started by none other than Free Republic's creator, Jim Robinson, who for some reason launched on Romney this afternoon. "I don't care who this socialist, abortionist, homosexualist, constitution trampling bastard picks for running mate," he screams. "If Romney's in I'm out! GOP, R.I.P!"

Around 250 comments follow: "Amen, Mr. Robinson, amen!" "Right on, Jim!" "[Romney] is the slimiest politician since Richard Daley, Sr." "Mitt Romney would spell the end of the GOP as a national party. He has no conservative values at all." "I agree... I’d like to see a Palin and Bachmann or Bachmann and Palin ticket."

Um, we think Governor Romney has a little work to do with his party's primary voters. And in the meantime, Mr. Cillizza, we suggest you wallow in the muck of the Republican base before you pronounce your GOP "winners."

(And you might want to do something about all those typos you make, too.)

UPDATE: It's Sunday and Jim Robinson is still launching against Romney. We cats can't figure out what's set him off this time, unless it's because the Mittster appeared on a talking-head show this morning. Anyway, he's pulling the circular firing squad a little tighter, in a way that we can't envision will win many elections for the Republicans.

"If there is anyone here who doesn't understand why we cannot support a slick socialist politician like Mitt Romney, God help you, but you're on the wrong website... FR is not for everyone!"

Whew, Jim — take a Xanax or something.

Michele Bachmann is Older than We Are...

...So officially, she has no excuse for not remembering this.

Republicans: Does anybody in your party have a brain, or are you all pathetic idiots? Just wondering.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

It's About Frickin' Time

We cats just want it on the record that the Republicans obstructed this HHS appointment despite 50 million Americans' lack of health insurance, not to mention the fact that we may be well into a potential flu epidemic.

If you wonder why the GOP is shrinking to a marginalized, regional, irrelevant party.... well, look no further than this.

Michael Steele's First 100 Days

By Baxter

So, Michael Steele is coming up on the 100-day anniversary as Chairman of the Republican National Committee. Let's see how he's done so far — aside from his disastrous media gaffes, that is.

He's lost a special Congressional election in an upstate New York district that boasts 70,000 more registered Republicans than Democrats.

He hasn't been able to orchestrate any kind of groundswell of support for former Senator Norm Coleman's endless legal appeals. In fact, 64 percent of Minnesotans want Coleman to quit and Senator-elect Al Franken to be seated.

He's presided over one of the most high-profile Senate party switchings in recent political history.

Oh, and that alleged Craigslist murderer guy? He's a Republican, too.

Michael Steele, you're a FAILURE. And Michael Steele, we cats love you!

Specter Joins Party of Satan — Freepers Hope He Comes Down with Swine Flu

By Sniffles

Wow! We cats were all ready to settle down for our early-afternoon nap when the word came across the wires that Senator Arlen Specter of Pennsylvania is switching parties.

So we guess that 10 years after his "not proven" vote against Bill Clinton's impeachment, Senator Specter's responsible support of the economic stimulus has so infuriated the nuts on the Republican right that they've driven him clean out of the GOP.

Our only comment — besides the fact that it's not nice to wish swine flu on anyone — is that we hope this gives Susan Collins and Olympia Snowe some food for thought.

Meanwhile, add Senator-elect Al Franken and we have a filbuster-proof majority! We cats PURR.

UPDATE: Somebody who calls himself "Right of Right Wing" over at Free Republic needs to check his Senate roster. "I say we clean house," he harumphs over the Specter news. "Take McCain, Snowe, S. Collins, G. Smith (Ore.) [sic], Lugar."

Sunday, April 26, 2009

The Devil Made Him Do It

By Zamboni

Since our team is now out of the Stanley Cup playoffs, we cats understand being on the losing side of things. But still, we were curious to see how the far-right base of the Republican Party was reacting to the GOP loss in the 20th Congressional District of New York.

It seemed especially interesting because "the base" are folks who — unlike the majority of the country — are in no mood to get on the Obama recovery and renewal train, or even to cheerfully wave it on. No, they're bruised, battered, resentful and mad. And before the special election was held to fill now-Senator Kirsten Gillibrand's former House seat, they were rooting and hoping and praying for GOP candidate Jim Tedisco, whom they seemed to like.

Well, everything's different now. Here's why Mr. Tedisco lost, courtesy of the angry, frustrated posters over at Free Republic.
  • Scott Murphy stole the election. ACORN helped him cheat.
  • The election wasn't free and fair. What happened to Democrats saying "Count every vote"?
  • This result was preordained, the same way Coleman vs. Franken was. (Hello? Would someone please send a note to Norm Coleman and Tim Pawlenty?)
  • Redistricting has put this particular C.D. out of reach for GOP. (Never mind that registered Republicans there still outnumber registered Democrats by 70,000.)
  • The "party elites" who ran the campaign didn't know what they were doing.
  • Michael Steele should resign.
  • Tedisco was a terrible candidate.
  • Tedisco is a RINO.
  • New York State is a hopeless cause for the Republicans. The party should just give up on the place.
  • The Democratic Party is the party of Satan.
We cats love these people! Who would entertain us if it weren't for the fearless Freeps?

Friday, April 24, 2009

Norm — Take the Hint!

By Baxter

Republican Jim Tedisco has conceded to Democrat Scott Murphy in the special election to fill Senator Kirsten Gillibrand's former House seat (NY-20).

What a refreshing change — a Republican who recognizes reality.

Meanwhile, we're waiting with great anticipation to see how the party of "no" spins this. And of course, to see what Norm Coleman does. (Gee, let us guess....)

UPDATE: For further proof that the right-wing Republican base is marginalizing the party out of existence, the nutbags over at Free Republic barely got to comment #4 on the Murphy-Tedisco story before somebody said, "Curious that the Republican quit before every vote was counted in this race. He probably was a RINO like McCain."

In other words, at the same time that it's blazing away in a circular firing squad, the GOP base is shooting itself in the foot. We cats are in awe. What a feat of multitasking!

(Photo: "Let's Face the Music and Dance," from Follow the Fleet)

35 & 44

"The concept of a second coming of Camelot has already become a cliché, but it is true that Washington has not experienced such a collective change of attitude since that young PT-boat skipper named John F. Kennedy replaced the supreme allied commander of World War II, not quite seven months before Barack Obama was born."

—Todd S. Purdum, Politico, April 24, 2009

(Photo: Callie Shell/Aurora for TIME)

Thursday, April 23, 2009

GOP: Zero Leadership

By Sniffles

Did you know that one of the nicknames that the right-wingers at Free Republic use for President Obama is "Zero"?

No, it's not a tribute to the late Broadway star, Mr. Mostel. Quite different. See, what they do is, they type the President's last name using the lowest numeral instead of an "O." Which then they shorten to just "Zero." Ha, ha, clever, yes?

Actually, we cats YAWN. But rather than post our favorite picture to illustrate our boredom, we've chosen instead to share the latest T.V. spot from the Democratic National Committee.

Because in just 60 seconds it vividly demonstrates who the real zeroes are.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

"I Am Going to Be Face-to-Face with Jesus Now"

By Zamboni

So in the wake of the release of the Bush Administration torture memos, the Senate Armed Services Committee has issued a report that the Bushies started racing toward torture as an interrogation method as early as 2001 — well before they said they did.

Are we cats surprised that Bush officials would lie, and say they only turned to waterboarding, sleep deprivations, confinement and "walling" later, and as a last resort? Nah.

But we still find it chilling, for a lot of reasons. One of them is Karla Faye Tucker.

What, you say? Uncovering the secret abuses of Bush II — a process which, by the way, has only just begun — make us think of a woman executed for murder in Texas in 1998?

Sure. Because even though the Governor at the time — one George W. Bush — had received appeals to spare the life of Tucker, a model prisoner and born-again Christian, he openly mocked her in an interview with Talk magazine. "'Please,' Bush whimpers, his lips pursed in mock desperation, 'don't kill me,' " the magazine reported. This prompted even right wingers like Gary Bauer to say, "I think it is nothing short of unbelievable that the Governor of a major state... thought it was acceptable to mock a woman he... put to death."

Bush is clearly a psychopath — someone totally without empathy. So that's why we're not surprised that his Administration behaved the way it did.

And don't even get us started on his alleged Christianity.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Obama Shakes Chavez's Hand, World Spins Off Axis and Hurtles Into Sun

By Baxter

It's always a treat when the Republicans give us reason to use this picture.

Today, we have a number of Grand Old Party members to thank for the occasion, but we guess we'll single out the ethically challenged former Speaker of the House, Newt Gingrich, for inspiring our collective yawn.

President Obama is making nice to the enemies of America! Mr. Gingrich groused on this morning's news shows.

You know what we cats have to say to all the Republican huffing and puffing over Chavez? BFD. (That means "big feline deal.") Get over it, guys. A new day has dawned — and even though the election was almost six months ago, you have yet to come to grips with it.

But we also send a big HISS to Mr. Gingrich for his gratuitous little swipe at former President Jimmy Carter. Mr. Gingrich wouldn't know a Nobel Prize if he tripped over it. And he apparently hasn't the remotest idea that the peace treaty between Israel and Egypt that President Carter brokered is still going strong after 30 years.

We'll take peace over warmongering, any time!

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Latin America Rocks!

And our President, for the first time ever, fits in really well. What a group — so multicultural and many-hued. (Not pictured here, unfortunately: Michelle Bachelet of Chile.)

UPDATE: We're so embarrassed. We forgot to mention the other female President from Latin America: Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner of Argentina. Sorry, Madam President!

Clearly, although we cats have no desire to share the politics of an elephant, we could definitely use the memory of one.

"I Didn't Know There Were So Many Racists Left"

By Sniffles

We cats thought that Janeane Garofalo's appearance on "Countdown with Keith Olbermann" the other night was pretty hard-hitting — and satisfying.

But we didn't know how hard-hitting and satisfying until we saw how the wingnuts over at Free Republic reacted.

Janeane dared to (excuse us) call a spade a spade — declaring that the very-mixed-message "tea party" demonstrators had one thing in common: hating the black man in the White House. And the Freepers have — in teabag parlance — boiled over.

"I would say I am surprised that MSNBC would put such a stupid Bull Dyke [sic] on their show but I would be not telling the truth," said one charming commenter. "Go back in the closet idiot [sic] where you belong."

"Garafolo [sic] is so unattractive (inside and out) that even neediest of lesbians wouldn’t want anything to do with her," stated another. (Do we cats detect a theme here?)

"This blight on Humanity [sic] and ENEMY of Americans gets away with it because She [sic] is not shouted down and made fun of. The Republicans BETTER STOP playing nice with these filthy vermin and say what is needed every time." (Wow — did this person post drunk?)

Here's what we cats think. We see in the postings at Free Republic glimmers of what the recent DHS report was warning about. And we think Janeane Garofalo is the cat's meow.

Friday, April 17, 2009

If Texas Secedes: The Bright Side

By Zamboni

We cats aren't big fans of the state of Texas, except maybe for the city of San Antonio and Congresswoman Sheila Jackson-Lee.

So we had mixed emotions to Governor Rick Perry's behavior at a "tea party" this week — first because like his national political party, the Governor has so clearly jumped the shark. But second, if the Lone Star State follows Perry's advice and tries to leave the union, we see some unexpected benefits.

If Texas secedes, its 34 electoral votes will go with it. Which means that the GOP couldn't win the Presidency again for at least two more generations. The red states with the next biggest number of electoral votes are Georgia (15) and Tennessee (11).

Losing Texas would balloon the current Democratic majorities in Congress. The Republicans would be stripped of 19 House seats and, of course, two Senators — letting Al Franken make the Senate veto-proof without a single Republican vote.

A Texas secession would mean that the United States of America could forever wipe any trace of either President Bush from its historical record. Or, at least, relegate them to the same historical dustbin that holds people like Jefferson Davis. The Obamas could put the Bush White House portraits (Mr. and Mrs., both sets) out with the trash.

We also wonder if a Texas departure would throw any Bush-appointed federal judge immediately off the bench — with subsequent vacancies filled by our current President, under the advice and consent of the Senate (minus John Cornyn and Kay Bailey Hutchison).

And think of all the Freepers, gun nuts, Apocalypse 2012 believers, polygamists and child-bride enthusiasts who would move out of places like Utah, Idaho, Wyoming and Montana and make a beeline for Texas. Places like Waco would be teeming with them in no time, which would probably help turn another three or four reliably red states purple, if not outright blue.

We like this plan! We just have one question: After Texas secedes, can San Antonio secede from Texas and rejoin America?

UPDATE: Yesss! A quick visit to Free Republic has yielded almost immediate results: a query from a right winger in Illinois who is asking about relocating to Lone Star World. It only took till post #16 before the ol' secesh spirit revealed itself. "Settlers are still welcome here," said a Freeper named Texas Fossil. "We might need you to defend her."

Thursday, April 16, 2009

"Ward, I'm Worried About the Beaver"

Freeper revelation:
"Tax Day... for CNN, MSNBC and other media outlets... was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to use the word 'teabagging' in a sentence. Teabagging... refers to a sexual act involving part of the male genitalia and a second person's face or mouth."

Freeper reaction: "These people are disgusting! What our culture has come to! My parents would never have believed that this could happen in this country! I find I am having difficulty believing it as well!"

God Bless the "U.S.S.A."

By Baxter

So thanks to that nutbag Governor Rick Perry (R-TX), the crazy right-wingers over at Free Republic are engaged in a serious discussion as to whether the Lone Star State should secede from the Union.

Attending a "tea party" yesterday, the politically embattled Governor implied that his state could, indeed, return to the glory days of the Texas Republic.

We're not clear whether the teabaggers who yelled "Secede!" to the Governor expected other Southern states to follow, should Texas — a huge recipient of federal stimulus money, by the way — actually act on this preposterous notion. And now, Texas State Senator Rodney Ellis has warned Governor Perry to back off this incendiary rhetoric.

Never mind that 140 years ago, more than 600,000 Americans died to settle the secession question. Despite the fact that the Civil War turned "the United States" from a plural to a singular noun, the Texas mental-cases-slash-teabaggers are armed (no doubt) and ready to re-fight all those battles — from Fort Sumter to Appamattox Court House.

"[I]f Texas seceded and all of us conservatives left the U.S.S.A., what would we care?" asks one Freeper today. (We can only assume that his abbreviation stands for "United Socialist States of America.") "While the U.S.S.A. goes straight to hell under the tyranny of Comrade Barack Obama, we conservatives in Texas would be living in prosperity and freedom."

Fear not, faithful readers: Just a few comments later, the Freepers betrayed their true stripes, dismissing State Senator Ellis thusly:

"Black politician. Nothing more has to be said."

Does this qualify as hate speech? We cats would vote yes.

"We Have Been Through a Dark and Painful Chapter in Our History"

By Sniffles

This sign, held by a protester at yesterday's "tea party" in Philadelphia, would always be stupid. But it's particularly stupid today.

This afternoon, President Obama released four previously classified memos from the Bush White House that detail (and attempt to justify) the torture methods used by the CIA on terror suspects.

The descriptions in these memos — which have been released almost entirely without censorship — are enough to make us cats hack up a hairball. Years ago, we visited castles in Europe with dungeons featuring the very torture techniques our nation is guilty of now. A queasy feeling, to say the least.

But back to the photo of our little Philadelphia teabagger. One of the problems with yesterday's demonstrations is that the participants lacked a clear, cohesive message. Some were anti-tax or protesting the deficit — but many others were fringe people, including "birthers," gun nuts, homophobes, Eric Rudolph fans, Palin supporters, Ayn Rand devotees, and white supremacists who put away their Nazi armbands for the day.

Ergo, this guy. Clearly he's one of those morons who believes that President Obama is a Muslim — despite the fact that Mr. Obama's campaign was nearly derailed last year by his Christian minister, the Reverend Jeremiah Wright. How that translated into the President being a Muslim, we have no freaking idea.

And now, the Bush torture memos. Written in the Administration of the guy who said his favorite political philosopher was Jesus Christ.

So we have to ask this teabagger: Which President is the real Christian?

The guy who tortured — or the guy who put a stop to it?

To Bag or Not to Bag

By Zamboni

Thanks, Talking Points Memo, for sharing some truly bizarre pictures of yesterday's "tea parties."

But does this photo from the Philadelphia shindig mean that the protesters understand what "teabagging" means? Or that they don't?

You be the judge! Our phones are open.

Hating the Heroes of United 93

By Baxter

We cats weren't going to post this early in the day, but we've been so revolted by a right-wing "tea party" attendee quoted over at Salon that we simply have to register our disgust.

"I don't like what's going on," this moronic teabagger said. "Government — to be honest with you, and this will probably be misquoted, but on 9/11, I think they hit the wrong building. They should have gone into the Capitol building, hit out [sic], knocked out both sides of the aisle, we'd start from scratch, we'd be better off today."

When the reporter pointed out that the 9/11 terrorists did try to hit the Capitol, this jerk was unmoved. "Yeah, I know, they missed," he said. "The wrong sequence. If someone had to go, it should have been the Capitol building."

We guess that this person — if, indeed, he is a person — believes that the brave passengers and crew of United 93 gave their lives for nothing. That is, if he thinks about them at all.

We not only HISS at him. We hope someone cuts his teabags off.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

We Blame Palin

By Sniffles

So.... the Department of Homeland Security has released a report stating that the current rise of right-wing extremist activity is comparable to the climate that existed prior to the bombing of the federal building in Oklahoma City in 1995.

(You remember that attack — 168 people killed by the, um, right-wing extremist Timothy McVeigh?)

We cats find it very interesting that the DHS report cautions that no violence has yet been explicitly threatened. However, the report also cites general concern in the right wing last year regarding the potential election of America's first African-American President.

"Most statements by right-wing extremists have been rhetorical...," the report says. "[But in] two instances in the run-up to the election, extremists appeared to be in the early planning stages of some threatening activity targeting the Democratic nominee, but law enforcement interceded."

Gee. We cats wonder when those "two instances" occurred. We would bet money that they happened right after a couple of Sarah Palin campaign rallies, during which she riled up her crowds to such a frenzy that attendees were yelling "Kill him!" We're waiting for someone to prove us wrong (which, by the way, we'd be happy if they do).

We cats don't worry about a lot in life — we generally believe that there's nothing that can't be solved by a good nap — but we do tend to worry about this. To our way of thinking, a liberal democracy cannot tolerate violence. We don't care if it's right-wing nutbags or Emma Goldman carrying it out. It's wrong either way.

That's why we found those Palin rallies last year so disturbing. And why we call upon Governor Palin to repudiate them, even now.

Reason over passion.

Why do we think that Sarah Palin doesn't believe in it?

"The Art of the Possible vs. The Art of the Impossible"

Ahhh, how we cats PURR at having an intelligent man in the White House again.

But we don't agree that this video is Barack Obama "versus" religion. We think this is Barack Obama explaining why having religion separate from our public life is such a great gift. Thanks, Founding Fathers!

Monday, April 13, 2009

Why Do The Freepers Hate America?

By Zamboni

Any time something happens like today's decision by a three-judge panel that Al Franken has won the Minnesota Senate race, we cats can't wait to rush over to Free Republic to see how the right-wing nutzoids are reacting.

As you can imagine, they're mighty unhappy. And they're saying some awfully rude things about the Land of 10,000 Lakes. But what's truly surprising is this post from some miscreant from the Lone Star State, who signs himself "chesty puller."

"[Minnesota] once was the only state to vote against Ronald Reagan," he fumes. "Can it get more stupid...? Idiots! God, how I wish Texas could leave this dumb-ass country."

Well, "chesty" — why wait for Texas? Go for it! We won't miss you!

"Quick, Bo — Let's Go Congratulate Al Franken for Getting the Most Votes in the Minnesota Senate Race!"

Note to Governor Pawlenty: Time to certify the election, Tim. Good boy, good boy!

Next Easter, Bo, Bite These Bunnies on the Leg

By Baxter

Today marked the first White House Easter Egg Roll of the new Administration — and we can't tell you how pleased we cats were to see the Obama family on the Truman Balcony and the South Lawn instead of, um, you-know-who. It is World Saved, indeed.

Except, goodness gracious. Are we the only ones who think these Easter Bunny characters are creepy? Brrrr!

How Can the Media Focus on the New First Puppy When Gay Marriage is About to Destroy Civilization as We Know It?

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Sixty-Four Years Later...

Thinking of you today, Mr. President.

Right Wingers Mourn Daring Rescue at Sea (Makes Obama Look Good)

By Sniffles

We cats normally aren't big fans of Easter. We're still waiting for a holiday that honors felines, not bunny rabbits. But today, we join the rest of America in celebrating the rescue of Captain Richard Phillips from his Somali pirate captors.

We also think it's highly amusing that the right-wing crazies who spend their days consumed with hate for President Obama now find themselves with Easter egg all over their faces. Why, just the other day, some moron who calls himself "The Daily Pundit" wrote about the pirate hostage crisis and opined that "our Transnazi [sic] President... is determined not to wield violence on behalf of America or her citizens under any circumstances, ever."

Well, Mr. "Daily Pundit," now that President Obama has personally directed our military to free Captain Phillips and kill the pirates, how do you like your crow? Baked, broiled, blackened?

Excuse us cats, we're mixing our metaphors. But we'd like to tell the right-wing nutbags something really, really important: When you say you want Obama to fail, you're rooting for people like the man pictured here to die. So, cut it out.

Great job, Mr. President. Happy Bunny Day, Captain Phillips!

Saturday, April 11, 2009

President Dippy Duck

By Zamboni

Well! No sooner had we cats twitted the folks over at Free Republic for implying that Michelle Obama should have curtsied to the Queen, than a brouhaha erupted over in that paranoid little corner of the Internet about whether the President bowed to the King of Saudi Arabia at the G20.

Our first reaction was a roll of the eyes, because we remember — and none too fondly, we might add — the days of George W. Bush holding King Abdullah's hand, and kissing him on both cheeks, and (yes) bowing to receive a medal from him. Funny how popular sitting on a ton of oil will make you.

But since the wingnuts were simply apoplectic over the Obama incident — and since we'd just quoted Miss Manners that no American ever bows or curtsies to a foreign monarch — we figured we'd better check out the video.

Well, we've watched it a couple of hundred times, and we just can't figure out what the President is doing. Unfortunately, there's somebody standing between him and the camera. But he's moving like one of those drinking-bird gizmos we remember from high school science class.

Therefore, our conclusion is that the President deserves a HISS for this. While we're happy that the Freepers are wasting their time fussing about it, we'd advise Mr. Obama to leave this particular body language home next time.

Friday, April 10, 2009

What's That Line About the Pot Calling the Kettle?

By Baxter

"You should not exaggerate and lie... when you are the Vice President of the United States.”

Ah, the deathless words of Karl Rove. If we cats could laugh, we wouldn't be able to stop right now. We assume Mr. Rove — whose body type, now that we think of it, actually resembles a pot and a kettle — was unaware of the irony of that statement when he excoriated Joe Biden on, you guessed it, FOX News.

And we also assume that the crack "news" team at FOX didn't challenge him on it one bit. But any self-respecting journalist would have — which just goes to show you that FOX guys are neither self-respecting nor journalists.

So, little FOX friends, allow us to frame the follow-up question for you. "Oh, really, Mr. Rove? Surely you must be speaking of your own Vice President Cheney, who made 48 false statements to gin up Bush's unnecessary invasion of Iraq."

How soon we all forget. Here are just a few of the choicer Cheney lies:

"Simply stated, there is no doubt that Saddam Hussein now has weapons of mass destruction. There is no doubt that he is amassing them to use against our friends, against our allies and against us." —August 26, 2002

"There's overwhelming evidence there was a connection between Al Qaeda and the Iraqi government." —January 23, 2003

"[F]rom the standpoint of the Iraqi people, my belief is we will, in fact, be greeted as liberators." —March 16, 2003

"I think the jury is still out [on Saddam having WMD]. It's going to take some additional considerable period of time in order to look in all of the cubbyholes and ammo dumps in Iraq where you might expect to find something like that." —January 22, 2004

But of course — as we all know — the CIA's top weapons inspector reported on April 25, 2005 that there were no WMD in Iraq. “As matters now stand, the WMD investigation has gone as far as feasible," he said.

Thanks, but no, thanks, Karl. We'll take Joe Biden any day.

UPDATE: A new CNN poll shows that 72 percent of Americans disagree that the Obama Administration has put the country at greater risk of a terrorist attack. Screw you, Dick.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Note to Norm Coleman: It's Over

By Sniffles

We cats were interested to see that Ramesh Ponnuru, blogger for the conservative National Review Online, has called on the always-unappealing Norm Coleman to throw in the towel and let his state be represented by two people in the Senate:

Amy Klobuchar and Al Franken.

But Coleman seems intent on denying his former constituents their rightful representation in Washington — threatening an appeal of the Senate recount to the Minnesota Supreme Court and possibly beyond.

Well, Normie should probably save his money, because the tide is rising against him. Not only are there, as Chris Cillizza avers,"increasing signs in some Republican circles that patience with Coleman is wearing thin" — but buried in the movie reviews of this week's issue of The New Yorker is the following message:

"NOW PLAYING Al Franken: God Spoke. The comedian turned Senator from Minnesota stands up (in more ways than one) to inspection in this documentary..."

Translation: Normie, you're toast!

UPDATE: The Minnesota DFL has launched a cute new website. Sign the petition today!

C'mon, Liberals! Schadenfreude is Fun!

By Zamboni

We cats have had some discussions with fellow liberals recently about the left's alleged impatience with the Obama Administration. This picture pretty much sums up our reaction to such discontent.

In other words, we just can't get all outraged right now. First, the Administration is barely three months old. Second — and more important — ideological purity gets you nowhere.

Do we agree with absolutely everything President Obama has done so far? Heck, no. But we understand that he won a resounding victory in 2008 with more than just lefty votes like ours. Therefore, we have no interest in weakening his hand by criticizing every move of his that isn't All Liberal, All The Time. It's just not realistic. And anyway, after eight years of Bush we vastly prefer having a President with whom we agree 90 percent of the time — instead of insisting that he toe our line 100 percent of the time.

Meanwhile, what we ARE enjoying is the current sorry state of the right wing and the GOP. And we don't understand why our humorless liberal friends can't get into it, too. Gosh, the wingnuts are a mess. They're mad at Rick Warren, planning silly "tea parties," trashing Levi Johnston and Meghan McCain, embarrassing themselves with bad budget pressers, obsessing about President Obama's birth certificate, worried sick about gay marriage, screaming about socialism, fascism and Marxism, and trying to get Michael Steele fired. What's not to love?

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Cat Fight! Palins vs. Johnstons

By Baxter

Yippee! We cats just love it when Republicans keep their circular firing squads going. This time, it's not about policy, but rather about pregnancies. And family values. And alleged money grubbing.

Levi Johnston has finally figured out that he was being used by the Palin family and has come out swinging, first on Tyra Banks and now on CBS.

After claiming (incredibly, to us) that he and his family aren't white trash, Mr. Johnston said things really went south when the Palins returned to Alaska after their 2008 election defeat. "I think when [Governor Palin] got back is when it went downhill. They don't think of me the same way anymore," he said.

Well, okay. We're not sure how a V.P. candidate or Presidential campaign could ever see Mr. Johnston as a political asset, but we'll let that pass for now. We're just so tickled that Mr. Johnston's sister also chimed in and said the Palins were "lying trying to save themselves."

We can only hope that this whole kerfuffle will help save us — from Sarah Palin ever being a national candidate again.

UPDATE: We've added "Grammar" to the label list for this post. Apparently there's some evidence that Sis said the Palins were trying to save "theirselves." What were we just saying about white trash?

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

It's Good to Be Gay

By Sniffles

We cats have seen worse days for homosexuality in America.

The Vermont state legislature has overridden their Republican governor's veto of a same-sex marriage bill. Which makes the Green Mountain State the fourth state in the union to enshrine marriage equality into law. (Forty-six to go...)

And President Obama has appointed the Human Rights Campaign's Harry Knox to serve on the White House's Advisory Council on Faith-based and Neighborhood Partnerships.

We cats weren't paticularly thrilled that the Obama Administration chose to keep this Bush-created religious operation, but we may change our minds — because the Knox appointment has our online wingnut friends simply apoplectic with fury. "The SLIMEBALL heathen SOB Obama will NEVER force his fagot [sic] loving buddies on me" is typical of the comments we've seen.

Yep, a good day.

UPDATE: And the D.C. Council has voted to recognize same-sex marriages performed in other states. If cats drank martinis, we'd definitely have one tonight.

R Troops Luv Their Prez

By Zamboni

The entire lefty blogosphere is running this photo today, just to drive the right-wing crazies... well, crazy.

We cats bet it's working. Because we remember with great satisfaction some of the more moronic Free Republic comments about how the troops must hate having to serve under a Marxist, socialist, fascist, Kenyan, Muslim President.

Hmmm. Yes, the Freepers must be right. These soldiers look really upset in this picture. But only those who can't get close enough to President Obama to hug him.

What will the "media voices of the nation's conservative populist anger" have to say about this? Will they, to borrow a phrase, support the troops?

(Photo: Reuters / Jim Young)

Monday, April 6, 2009

"We Do Not Consider Ourselves a Christian Nation"

By Baxter

Hoo, boy — the right-wing maniacs sure are upset about this.

Too funny. Because first of all, they're ignoring the fact that the United States was founded upon the principle of separation of church and state. And second, they're not listening to the rest of what President Obama said.

Which was: "We consider ourselves a nation of citizens who are bound by ideals and a set of values."

And he went on to compliment Turkey as the same kind of nation. (And one, we can't help noting, that George W. Bush was an idiot to alienate.)

We cats PURR at President Obama for bringing sanity back to international diplomacy. And we PURR at the brave poster over at Free Republic, who is saying radical lefty things like, "We are not a theocracy and I hope we never become one." And getting hammered for it, as you can imagine. You go, girl!

A New Era of Responsibility

By Sniffles

As President Obama travels around the world, cleaning up messes left by George W. Bush, we cats are struck by his continuing leadership theme in the wake of eight years of Republican rule:

Let's all act like grownups for a change.

While our Republican friends would probably point to Bill Clinton as a supreme case of arrested adolescent development, we'd like to remind them that the things President Clinton was immature about wouldn't get the world blown up — or skyscrapers brought down. (Heck, it didn't even blow up his marriage.)

Since Clinton's time, however, the Bush Administration and the Republican Party carried towel-snapping and frat-boy behavior to new heights. And it's been bad for America.

So we'd like to take a moment to make the following observations about recent elephantine conduct — and its consequences.

Chancellor Angela Merkel of Germany was probably thrilled to attend an international summit without receiving an unwanted Presidential backrub.

It's not a good idea to punish a key Middle Eastern ally just because it doesn't support your pre-emptive invasion of a nonbelligerent country based on lies.

If you're thinking about running for President in 2012, it probably diminishes you to have to respond to tabloid stories about your messy personal family life.

If you're caught doing something wrong and initially agree to admit it and take your lumps, follow through. Don't try to squirm out of it later. It only makes you look more like the asshole you are.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Tidbits and Cat Treats (Friday Edition)

By Zamboni

So that principled conservative, Governor Mark Sanford of South Carolina, has caved and decided to accept stimulus money for his cash-strapped, undereducated and unemployed constituents after all. We cats couldn't wait to see what the right-wing nutjobs at Free Republic had to say about that.

Before, Sanford was a Freeper hero. Now, he's a goat. "RINO!" screams one. "Just another politician with no cojones." And those are just the first few comments we've read.

It'll be interesting to see how a party that's fixed so many of its hopes on a gaggle of untried governors will fare. Already their expectations have been somewhat dashed. First, there was Bobby Jindal's laughable "Republican Response" to President Obama's address to Congress a few weeks ago. Then, people started realizing Tim Pawlenty's no-win situation with the Minnesota Senate race. And now, Sanford.

Gee, what else can happen? Like, will we find out that family-values icon Sarah Palin knew all along that Bristol and Levi were having sex?

Nah... could never happen. Could it?

You Really Ought to Give Iowa a Try

By Baxter

Perhaps Iowans will be "cold as a falling thermometer in December" no more. The state's Supreme Court just declared Iowa's ban on same-sex marriage unconstitutional. Surely we'll soon be hit with a bunch of "American Gothic" parodies — with two men, or two women, with that farmhouse and pitchfork.

But, seriously. That makes three states out of 50 in which Americans enjoy marriage equality. That's because Vermont's Republican governor has indicated he'll veto any same-sex marriage bill that hits his desk, and of course, the Mormon Church last fall bankrolled a repeal of gay marriage in California. (Why that church continues to enjoy tax-exempt status is beyond us cats.)

This slow-as-molasses movement of the United States toward what we see as just plain common sense continues to be frustrating. Why, whole countries (Canada, for instance) have quietly legalized gay marriage without fanfare or fuss.

We just have to keep plugging along — and reminding ourselves of the words of Martin Luther King: "We shall overcome because the arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice."

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Let's Hear It for All the Smart Girls!

By Sniffles

Michelle Obama's had a very good day in Londontown.

We cats are especially impressed with her visit to the Elizabeth Garrett Anderson School this afternoon. Not just because the students — all girls, mostly minorities — were squealing with delight (and alarming the Secret Service with their desire to hug her), but mainly because the First Lady told them what was really important in life.


As tickled as we are with the rapturous coverage of her wardrobe and her relaxed, affectionate demeanor with the Queen (reciprocated by Her Majesty, we note), we just love the fact that Mrs. Obama told those students today, "Being smart is cooler than anything in the world."

Empowering and inspiring young women everywhere. Quite refreshing, especially in a week that saw Afghanistan legalize rape in marriage.

Oh, and we cats really like this outfit.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

On a Related Note: Happy (Late) Birthday, William Daniels

Just So You Know What We Mean...

Elizabeth and Philip, circa 1947.

Try to Remember

By Zamboni

Everyone's agog about Barack and Michelle Obama's first trip abroad as First Couple, but we cats just have one question.

What the heck's happened to Prince Philip?

Her Majesty the Queen — now, she looks fab. Comes from great stock, don'tcha know, and we love the pink frock. Sets off her crown of white hair to perfection. And the President and First Lady, as usual, seem to have just sprung from the pages of a glossy fashion magazine. He's cool and tailored, she's professional and, at the same time, ladylike. No problems there.

But the Duke of Edinburgh — *sigh.* We cats remember a time when he was quite the rake. He gave us all the vapors, because he was so handsome and dashing and yet still knew he had to be one step behind his wife at all times. The recipe, in our book, for the perfect aphrodisiac. Now, he looks bent, wizened, slow — like we'd find ourselves caught, walking impatiently behind him, at Aventura Mall.

Gasp! We know what's happened to him — age. OMG, is Philip really 87??? Almost 88??? That explains everything.

You humans really should have nine lives, like we cats do.

UPDATE: We cats note with great interest that the right-wing folks over at Free Republic seem to — inexplicably — think that Mrs. Obama should have curtsied to the Queen. We find this strange, coming from people who profess to be such staunch American patriots. As Miss Manners instructs us, "One does not bow or curtsy to a foreign monarch, because the gesture symbolizes recognition of her power over her subjects." Tea party, anyone?