The Lady from Rome

By Baxter

Pope Benedict’s visit to the U.S. reminds us of a favorite joke. A gay guy in church whispers to the priest, who is passing up the aisle swinging the incense, “Honey, I love your dress, but your purse is on fire.”

No offense to our Democratic friends who are Catholic — like our Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, whom we spied doing a bit of ring-kissing yesterday. It’s just that the visit, and the credulous hoopla around it, have been so dispiriting that we’re forced to find refuge in irreverent humor.

Particularly objectionable is the fact that the pontiff held a closed-door meeting with a small, hand-picked number of victims of priestly sexual abuse. Looks like Benedict has adopted the Bushian practice of only meeting with friendly, vetted audiences who won’t cause any “trouble.” (Oh, and be sure to keep other folks out, by keeping the whole thing a big secret.)

This disturbs us cats. We’ve always been told that humans occupy the highest rung of the ladder of sentient beings — able to think and reason, right wrongs, correct injustices, and recognize their own reflections when they see them in a mirror.

Guess Benny’s not realizing how the Church’s image is striking people these days. He can run around apologizing and hold surprise meetings with abuse victims all he wants — but the hypocrisy is pretty rampant since he’s been a big backer of one of the most egregious pedophile protectors, Cardinal Edward Egan of New York. He even appointed Egan to the high Vatican court that disciplines wayward priests.

So, Your Holiness, because you’re talking the talk but still not quite walking the walk, we choose to neither HISS nor PURR at you today. Instead, we gaze at you suspiciously and switch our tails.

And by the way, we think your purse is still on fire.