Obamacare: Who's Smiling, Who's Not

By Sniffles

Surely the millions of Americans (some leukemia-ridden) who would have lost their Obamacare coverage if today's Supreme Court decision had gone the other way must be raising a glass tonight. And whew, we don't blame them. What a relief it must be to know that the GOP wasn't able to snatch their healthcare away!

Then just for fun, we started to wonder who else must be celebrating. Which led us to think about who wasn't. Here's who we came up with, on both sides.

Everyone knows how Antonin Scalia feels. He made it abundantly clear with all that bile and colorful language he spouted from the bench. ("Jiggery-pokery"? What century is he from?) But as long as we're on the subject of vocabulary, we'd like to say that it's highly amusing that the name "Scalia" is so close to the word "sclerotic." (As Casey Stengel would say, you could look it up.)

And of course our teabaggy friends over at Free Republic are definitely not putting on a happy face. In fact, they've been raging all day — not knowing whether to impeach John Roberts or move to Costa Rica first. But if there's a heaven, and if Ted Kennedy is there, he's one grin-bearing angel right now. (Would President Obama have pushed so hard for healthcare reform early in his first term if Kennedy had not died when he did? We wonder.)

We cats have heard all day that, behind the scenes, the Republicans are relieved that they don't have to deal with the fallout of an adverse SCOTUS ruling. Horrors — they might have had to come up with an alternative! But balancing that out, we think, is the big headache they're going to have in the 2016 clown car race. The words "litmus test" come to mind. (And just imagine how rigid that litmus test will be if the Supremes uphold marriage equality nationwide!)

Finally, of course, we cats are thrilled. Sure, it might have been fun to watch Paul Ryan and his fellow House goofballs try to cobble together an ACA replacement by the middle of next week. But thanks, we'll take today's King v. Burwell decision over that any day. Many Americans will sleep easier tonight, thanks to the Supreme Court, and that makes us PURR.