Saturday, April 14, 2018

The Coffee's Black, But The Patrons Can't Be

By Zamboni

Something terrible happened at a Starbucks in Philadelphia, and now #BoycottStarbucks is trending on Twitter — to the point where Starbucks has issued an apology.

As well they should. Two African-American men were handcuffed by Philly cops for the hideous crime of Waiting For A Friend In A Starbucks Without Ordering Coffee. The men cooperated without incident, because God knows if you're black and you object to something a police officer is doing, you're good as dead.

We cats are as appalled as the rest of you, but we're pretty sure that #BoycottStarbucks won't get anywhere. In fact, right wingers are already laughing at it. So let's get a grip on this, shall we?

Howard Schultz did not issue a memo to his employees telling them to call the cops on black guys who were hanging out. (We're not into the coffee shop scene ourselves, because we drink our Starbucks at home. But we get that, inexplicably, other people are.) So this disgusting incident has to be laid at the feet of the individual store. Besides, as we all know from the evangelicals' lamebrain "Christmas cup" kerfuffle, effectively boycotting something as big and as popular as Starbucks is next to impossible.

What we need to do is take this as a bitch-slap for white people, to make them realize — perhaps more effectively than any other incident could — how fragile African Americans' position in society is. Even today. In 2018.

Black guys like Michael Brown getting gunned down in the street aren't relatable for white Americans. Getting arrested for doing nothing in a Starbucks? Well, that's something that the white people at the next table would see. We cats hope this knocks some sense into their heads. And by the way — the employees who called the cops? They should be fired. If not, we cats HISS.

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