Unhappy Warriors

By Hubie and Bertie

CPAC is convening again, with all of its dark and dystopian takes on the state of the nation. Goodness gracious, it's nothing but grievance and anger and shouting. It got us cats wondering: Whatever happened to the sunny optimism of Ronnie Reagan's "shining city on a hill"?

Then, when we thought about it, we realized that Reagan was the exception, not the rule. With precious few outliers, the Republican worldview has always been sour, angry and resentful. Donald Trump just amplified it and set it free — allowing people to be their worst selves.

A little background: Reagan started out as a New Dealer, but changed his tune in the Sixties, railing angrily against Medicare and other lefty initiatives. But by the time he ran for President in 1976 and, especially, in 1980, somebody advised him to cloak his retrograde ideas in amiability. And he was successful — but the GOP before him, and well after him, trafficked more in indignant entitlement. Remember how in 1936, FDR singled out his detractors and said, "I welcome their hatred"? Well, Democrats could still say that today.

Funnily enough, there's no reason for 2023's mainstream voters — or, for that matter, any voters — to be attracted to an angry, aggrieved Republican message. Unless they spend all their days feeling angry and aggrieved themselves — but most people don't. They go about their lives and, if we politicos are lucky, they beam in every two or four years or so, and decide to vote for somebody (or vote against somebody else). These are the majority of Americans — and as imperfect as our democracy is, they still basically make things work. So why should they vote for somebody who yells at them?

Look back on Republican nominees for the past 60-plus years, and you don't see a lot of cheerful folks. Maybe Eisenhower was the last one, and he was merely genial. Nelson Rockefeller was happy — in fact, he even married someone named Happy. But the party crushed him three times before he died in the saddle. Nixon was quintessentially resentful and paranoid. Dole was menacing (picture him in his 1976 VP debate, muttering about "Democrat wars"). Both Bushes modulated their behavior, because in 1988 and 2000, they wanted to win. Romney is a blank slate — neither happy or un-.

But with Trump in 2016, Republicans truly unleashed their outrage. And by a combination of the Electoral College, Russian interference, James Comey, and the assistance of the press, they won.

(Interestingly, the closest a Republican has come recently to happy warriorship was Sarah Palin, with her hateful politics balanced in 2008 by a winky, cheerful, hockey mom persona. And the Republicans have banished her to the dumpster ever since.)

Our point is this: After all these years, Republicans need to understand that grievance and fury don't sell. Reagan knew this, but the GOP of today would be unrecognizable to him. (And to Nancy.) Which explains why Nikki Haley attended CPAC today and was heckled not only during her speech, but in her hotel-hallway press availabilities. This is the way the base of the GOP is going to treat anyone who is anti-Trump. And thanks to that, they're going to lose — because they'll be going up against the ultimate Happy Warrior, Joe Biden. We cats PURR.

(IMAGE: Nelson Rockefeller gives the finger to students at SUNY Binghamton in 1976. Ford-Dole lost the Presidential election that year, but Rockefeller, who today would be considered a wildly liberal Republican, epitomized the kind of guy who loved — loved — the political give and take. Like Joe Biden trapping Republicans into a pledge to maintain Medicare and Social Security. We cats PURR again.)