Play This Fun Campaign 2008 Game!

By Baxter

Feeling a little battered by the fluctuating national polls and the horrible slew of negative T.V. spots from the McCain campaign? Glad that Paris Hilton's mom has repudiated the "Celebrity" ad, but worried about it anyway?

We cats understand. Although we are the very definition of relaxation, we are Democrats. So we know you might be feeling a little bit skittish, especially after that disastrous Supreme Court decision in 2000 and John Kerry's loss in '04. Maybe you're even wondering how you'll make it to November without breaking into Rush Limbaugh's house for some Valium or Xanax.

So to feel better, here's a little game you can play. Fill in the blank on the following question.

"Would you trade places with John McCain on —?"

The Polls? — Yes, they're all over the place. And yes, the pundits have bought into the mantra that with the economy the way it is, Senator Obama should be miles ahead, nationally. But we cats believe this line of argument is the product of lazy talking heads whose bosses are leaning on them to produce "conflict narratives" on the cable news shows. (And to date, while it's close, Senator Obama has never been behind.) We also believe that many of Senator Obama's strongest supporters are being underpolled. But even if you don't buy any of this, check out today's New York Times electoral map. The only polls that matter between now and Nov. 4 are state-by-state.

Money? — Senator Obama has raised more money than anyone who's ever run for President before, mostly from donors who have given less than $100. And he can spend unlimited amounts of money in the general election. Senator McCain can't.

Organization? — The Obama campaign is a lean, mean, disciplined fighting machine. They are leak-proof, tech-savvy and tightly knit. They're opening offices in states that Democrats have no business in — like Montana and North Dakota. They're registering new voters at a record pace. And they're forcing the McCain campaign to defend turf that normally they'd be able to take for granted. Virginia's only the tip of the iceberg.

Up-ticket/Down-ticket Effects? — The Democrats could gain between 20 and 30 seats in the House. With the indictment of Senator Ted Stevens (R-AK), they could get close to 60 seats in the Senate. Strong Democratic candidates at the Congressional level can contribute even more to Senator Obama's margin in key states, just as a strong performance by Senator Obama can contribute to Congressional margins. However you look at it, Democrats definitely have the advantage in the coattails department.

State of the Party? — The Republicans are a mess. The base doesn't trust John McCain. Enthusiasm is rock-bottom. Bob Barr is running as a Libertarian. Ron Paul is holding a counter-convention in Minneapolis. George W. Bush is the leader of the Republican Party. Eek!

There are more items on this list — such as "National Mood," "Issues," "Image," and "Luck" — but this post is already way too long. We'll revisit this game again. In the meantime, enjoy!