Jon Huntsman is too sick to fly to New Orleans for the big Republican "leadership" hootenanny. He has a cold.
Poor Jon. We cats would like to fix him some chicken soup, followed by a hot toddy, and, with much sighing and commiserating, lay cool cloths on his fevered brow. You know, something right out of Jane Austen.
Okay. For the umpteenth time, we admit it, all right? We have a crush on Jon Huntsman. We never thought we'd feel this way about a member of the GOP, and a Mormon to boot. But we can't help it — we dream about him cat-stroking us and whispering sweet Mandarin Chinese nothings in our ears.
The only thing that mildly worries us is the possibility that the Grand Old Party will decide they have a crush on Huntsman, too. Because we think he could be a formidable candidate in the 2012 general election.
But then we remember the nutty Republican base — filled with teabaggers and evangelical Christians and frothing-at-the-mouth, gun-loving bigots — and we relax.
'Cuz, see, the other thing about Jon Huntsman is that those gay Republican log-cabin types have joined us in our lust. Here's the story.
Sooooooo. How many times do you think Mitt Romney's folks and Tim Pawlenty's folks and Michele Bachmann's folks and Herman Cain's folks and all the other haters' folks have e-mailed this link today? We cats are guessing a lot.
By tomorrow, there will be no living South Carolina Republican who has not seen or heard this story. We guarantee it.
So — good. Please, Republican Party, please, please, please dislike Jon Huntsman. We want him all to ourselves!
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