Saturday, February 2, 2019

Not Funny, Not Ever

By Sniffles

We cats are shocked and astounded, on so many levels, at Ralph Northam. We have to reluctantly conclude that Northam should step aside and make way for Lt. Governor Justin Fairfax, who is highly qualified — and history-making — in every way. (Virginia Democrats, at least, can be proud to avoid the "Pence Pause" — which is when the solution is worse than the original problem.)

We could get into the hypocrisy of the Old Dominion GOP, the white supremacist they nominated for Senate in 2018, and the racist campaign that Chinless Ed Gillespie ran for Governor in 2017. But we won't. We also will refrain from asking why in the hell medical schools have yearbooks. (Yearbooks? Like high school kids? Aren't they too busy studying to be doctors for that crap?)

Instead, we'll just focus on our disappointment in Ralph, even though we totally believe him when he says his 1984 antics don't reflect the man he is today. Delegate Danica Roem is right when she says that Northam has opened wounds in Virginia that can't be healed any other way.

So that's our story, and we're sticking to it. We've taken pains to educate ourselves on the offenses of minstrelsy, which has been presented as benign entertainment in the past and which we've all had to realize is just not cool (looking at you, Al Jolson, Mickey Rooney, Judy Garland and Fred Astaire).

But that white hood has never stood for anything but murder, rape, mutilation, lynching and terror. Even when the Coen brothers and Spike Lee put the Klan in their comedies, they made it menacing — which it is. Sorry, Ralph. The KKK is never funny. We cats HISS.

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