Friday, April 17, 2020

Itching To Open

By Hubie and Bertie

Benedict Donald is off the deep end today. (Wait until he sees these nine minutes of delicious video from New York Governor Andrew Cuomo. A thrilling takedown.)

Anyway, even before Cuomo destroyed him in this morning's news conference, Trump had already gone full 25th amendment, tweeting demands for the "liberation" of Virginia, Michigan and Minnesota. All three have seen small-to-middling demonstrations of teabaggers, bought and paid for by the DeVos family. So Trump is fanning the flames. As Washington state Governor Jay Inslee has pointed out, doesn't that constitute fomenting domestic rebellion? (He means violence.)

We were trying to figure out why Benedict Donald is so obsessed with these mean, mean Governors. Sure, a lot of them are Democrats and lead states that didn't vote for him and still won't. But Michigan? He won it in 2016. And Minnesota is on his wish list. Why would he risk alienating voters there? It makes no sense, but we have a theory.

Trump knows that his ace in the hole this November is the economy. It's the only reason swing voters might go for him, much as they dislike his boorish antics. And now that the coronavirus has cratered it, he's desperate to get it cranking back up in time for the election, right? Simple enough.

Trump's problem is that he can't get the economy back on track just with teeny states like South Dakota, Arkansas and Mississippi. He needs the economic engines of New York, California, and the industrial Midwest. (Of those, only Ohio is headed by a Republican.) So big-state Democratic Governors hold Trump's political future in their hands. That's probably not their biggest concern at the moment (their constituents' health is), but their decisions on "reopening," if they make them responsibly (and they will), could spell Donald's doom.

This drives Trump crazy. So he flails and flails.

What's weird is that trying to reopen the economy in one fell swoop, without testing and tracing and safeguards, will just send it back down the toilet again. Why don't the Trumpsters get this? We cats are still stumped about that, and we HISS.

(IMAGE: Joshua Bickel, The Columbus Dispatch)

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