Wednesday, July 22, 2020

Delays That Will Live In Infamy

By Sniffles

Joe Biden's use of the term "quit" in his campaign messages — as in, "Trump has quit on this country" — is a shrewd choice. You don't have to read niece Mary's best-selling expose to know that in the family formerly known as Drumpf, "quit" was definitely a four-letter word. They ostracized the star-crossed Fred Jr. for "quitting on" the demonic Fred Sr.'s business ambitions.

So keep at it, Joe! It will drive Trump crazy.

Benedict Donald is trying mighty hard, all of a sudden, to disprove his quittiness. He's back at the White House lectern, giving coronavirus "briefings," except without any of the scientists who are the ones we really need to hear. And according to the media, he has a "new tone" — if by that, they mean tediously reading from a prepared script and ending sentences in all the wrong places. Aside from making news by sending good wishes to accused child sex trafficker Ghislaine Maxwell (who surely must have some dirt on him), Trump announced that his task force was developing a plan for dealing with the pandemic.

"Developing a plan"? Now? Think about this for a second.

COVID-19 first surfaced in China in November. The first cases to appear in the US happened in January. And then things started accelerating: The coronavirus made frequent appearances in the Presidential Daily Brief in both January and February. And we all know what's happened since — in March, April, May, June and most of July.

The historical equivalent would be if FDR had gone in front of Congress — not in December of 1941, but, instead, in June of 1942 — and promised he would have a declaration of war against the Empire of Japan... well, pretty darn soon.

Calling Biden's speechwriters: Maybe you need to tweak his copy, because Trump never engaged with the virus to begin with. You can't quit if you don't even start, can you? We cats HISS.

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