Monday, January 2, 2012

Sad Little Freepers

By Miss Kubelik

We cats promised you more Freeper madness, so on the eve of the big clownapalooza in Iowa, we thought we'd check on our crazy teabagger friends at you-know-where to see how they're feeling today.

The quick answer is, a little depressed. Not necessarily because they think their nemesis Willard Mitt Romney will win tomorrow, but because of What Might Have Been. Specifically, contemplating the first official contest of 2012 without their two faves, "Herb" Cain and the famous quitter from Alaska, makes them pretty down in the mouth.

Here's a typical comment: "Palin and Cain were run out of town on a rail, politically raped and lynched because the mainstream media...made it happen. We let it happen only because we are truly without power. The only real power is held by the liberal cabal. The mainstream media is [sic] owned and managed by leftist/gay/pagans."

"Without power"? Aw, c'mon, guys, buck up! You've only been running the House for the last year. Plus, there's that little matter of how both the famous quitter and "Herb" contributed to their respective ignominious downfalls.

We're sure that the Freeps will get over their funk once the unGoogleable Rick Santorum wins the caucus tomorrow. In the meantime, we're more worried about Free Republic posters like this fellow, who we sincerely hope is not your next-door neighbor:

"2010 — We bought 14.5 MILLION guns. 2011— We bought 16 MILLION. 2012—?? I think we all know how this mess will end. Lock and load, boys and girls — it’s going to get interesting."

If he is your next-door neighbor, we advise you to call the police.

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